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April 15, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #2

Oh and I got this in my inbox today from The G.A.:

wHY DID i END SLEEPING ING THE LITTLE PARK(dUKE OF bEDFORD’S LOT? CAN’TREMEMBER for sure. 1, it was the closes free space to home and had a coupla big trees to pee against in case of emergencies, and the old man had a bad attack of S. ON THE LIVER and he said he could smell alcohol on my breath, the sharp nosed prat, I’LD BEEN PLAYING SNOOKER UP IN THE nAG’S hEAD hOLLOWAY with some mates from nght school and had drunk one pint of rough cider. Do you find the Caps lock a pain in the cock, whereever? I inevitably forget the rotten things on. As YOU HAVE NOTICED.

What sensible question was I going to ask you? Yeah. XXCENSOREDXX? did you get over the minor problem of being crook. Did the XXCENSOREDXX girlfriend keep her snot-faced visage out of your probs? Hope your happier now.

I think you and I must E.S.P relative to not feeling too good. Ever since that bloody fall when I cracked my scone I felt like shit. Even right now, stretch a meter of green snot and admire it gleaming in the sunlight. Stretch it and snap. the loose end flips back and gets you in the eye. Fark!

What was the other question you askrd me? Ah yeah. the black pipe! that was on the Victorian built nurses home added to the Gloucester Royal Hospital. Led up to the top dormers just under the roof guttering, Dorothy(1st wife) used to sleep therein. after a few beers the only way to a quick snog was to climbthe friggin pipe,all six stories of it! Not long out of the Scots Guards your old fella 20 I think , was one fit twat. But that wasyesterday, 81 years of the blinders. And I loved them. Except me old man. I can rememember my mother muttering to her self at his regal funeral”I’ m glad he’s gone. Bit rough but ththe bugger used to wack her stupid. XXCENSOREDXX? Must go shagger. Though me lunch is a couple of Saos and a cuppa Orange PekoeCheers Buddy. Miss yer. ALL THE EFFIN TIME, Yer pa.xxxx

Not wanting to sound too much like a perverse version of the Pussy Cat Dolls, don’t cha wish your Dad was cool like mine?

Obviously now it is going to need to be discovered – where was this pool hall – as this is now in my neighbourhood. Also night school? Doing what? And I need to get him to tell the story of the Scots Guards.

LUNCH TIME. I going to go to Archgate and have a kofta wrap I think with garlic sauce and salad and chips. They are the my favourite cafe / restaurant in North London. They are directly over the road from the Archway tube station and I have now been going there for years.

xx Lektrogirl

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