Hello! Bonjour! Willkommen! xx Lektrogirl

LOVING MYSELF

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 22:31:00 +0000

Loving Myself, originally uploaded by Lektrogirl.

Yes pretty cool today. Also, I created my own Facebook Application today called CONTEMPORARY ART. For dinner I ate the last of the roast pork belly with some potato roesti. I watched the third episode of CSI Miami today. I put the heating on. Can you believe it? Then I went through all my desktop and random folders and realised I have quite a collection of great Flickr Porn now. I can't wait for Valeria to come to London in September so we can discuss such matters. I hope she likes to sit around and do nothing as much as I do. I am already thinking about what I will do for Christmas - it looks like tickets to Australia are £1600 - a £400 increase on last year. So maybe I will go for my birthday or something which is half the price. But still - Christmas alone in London. Thank Allah for all the Muslims who have chicken shops that are open on Christmas day or WTF would I eat?

xx Lektrogirl

8:30PM FEELING LIKE 2:00AM

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 19:42:00 +0000

By the end of the day today I was totally starving and I got the C2 bus home from Oxford Circus like greased lightening cause I knew what I had in the fridge. As you can see in the picture above, here is the leftover's from the lunch on Sunday I made that I was bragging about. Everything on the plate tasted even better after a day to marinade in the own juices and I fried the pork again and hot it was EVEN better. I think it would be great hot with puy lentils etc. Will definitely make that again.

On the way to Ladurée the other day, I saw Barbara Windsor get out of a taxi and I swear she had a chicken head! It was really good. She was also wearing mega heels and in all light coloured clothing. What a woman. Later that afternoon I saw that REALLY tall guy from The Office with his short girlf walking down Wardour Street. Hmmm... when was that? Thursday maybe on my way to the George and Dragon to the launch party for Paul Gorman's / Nigel Waymouth's / Granny Takes A Trip / The Look Presents t-shirt range for TOPMAN. Yerrr I know - TOPSHOP - totally against everything I believe in. However what I can appreciate is the history of the British fashion retail and design industry being visited by Paul Gorman which is what I grew up revering reading i-D and The Face back in 1988 in Tasmania thinking "OMG I CAN'T WAIT TO GO TO LONDON!!!" LOLZ. Apparently the rain was so heavy the roof leaked at Mum's all over my old magazine collection. FUCK.

Here I am looking a total babe as per usual in a t-shirt I wouldn't normally wear because I made the decision a while ago to stop dressing like a man but this picture shows that my lipstick is looking pretty hot. Probably I was pretty pissed by this stage from drinking Koko Kanu and Coke. I mean Max and I were topless in the George changing from our regular clothes into the t-shirts from The Look Presents range. If you want to check them all out though, look here. Some of the designs are actually reproductions of the original Granny Takes A Trip store front back in the 60's [like the one I had on]. You didn't know that Granny Takes A Trip was a shop back then? Ohh... God... where do I begin? Not even worth it...

So, mega day today back at work. Feeling hyped but can't believe how tired I am so early. I'm looking forward to getting paid. I want to go to a restaurant The Cardinal visited with her family recently:

Nearly as good as the instrumental to Hairbraider by my main man Kelz!

xx Lektrogirl

ME 2003

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 19:02:00 +0000

Me 2003, originally uploaded by Lektrogirl.

In Zurich just off Langstrasse. SO LONG AGO. I wasn't working, DJing all over the place, swanning around, doing whatever with whoever, whenever. All co-ordinated from my Tangerine iMac.

Life was so different then. It seems like I remember it as being always hot and sunny. I guess I just don't remember bad weather. But then summer in Switzerland is ALWAYS banging cause they build temporary bars along the Limmat and have grills on the side for wurst and beer. AND there is the lake that you can swim in. And the forest. B.A.N.G.I.N.G. However, it is a kind of boring town. Only good for eating, drinking and lying down cause it is too hot.

xx Lektrogirl

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #13.5

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 07:23:00 +0000

Bugger - this one came on Thursday but I forgot to post it!! Sorry everyone.

-----

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 August 2008 03:20
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: first day down, This is in answer to your first day down' a good learning day, and lots of quids to come?

I know rour'e busy etc. but you are the only one who has the brightest and appreciative of the 'rare' vulgaruty that sneaks into my writing. I don't have control over it, it just overflows as from a carbuncle pussing out of an infected follicle. God help us!
Our boss stopped me yestertday looking all harrassed and worn out, I asked "what's up Chook" To which she replied this place gives me the 'effein shits' (quote, unquote)
Evidently the Salvo's are giving her a hard time, which is easy for them , because they think they've got God on their side, What a load of bollocks?
The two chaplains are very pleasant folk, they are from the south of Edinburgh.
'Borderers' to be precise. Still they are Scottish and are fairly understanding of my antipathy to religion when I relate my earl days in Glsgow being a protestant at a predominantly Catholic school. My brothers and I gave blood noses to Catholic abusers every day we gathered in the playground for recess. Even the shit faced girls used to call out 'Protestant Bastards'
But that was a lot of yesterdays ago my little friend.I remember give ing one shiela a bit of a dunt up the arse to help her into the classroom for wittering shit at me.
Miss King sent me for the strap and book for violence on a female. She larraped six of the best on my hand. Which was fair enough. W hen I think of my father, thumping shielas isn't really fair play.
Itried deleting all my previous emails theother day, yours and mine but the flamin printer took a hand in printing the saved in drafts tray.
Some of the reading from each other is a good laugh!
Specially bits about what hangs in and out of best? Don't tell me youve relaxed you guard and let XXCENSOREDXX have a serve? Fark, (exactly)That's enough of your expensive time. I hope it get's more interesting for you mate? Luv ex PaXXXX.

------

I promise that I will not let emails sit in my inbox for too long without posting them.

Well work again this morning and I cant believe that I am awake and happy at this time of day. Totally unheard of! On the weekend I was awake pretty early - the transition hasn't been that bad from slacker internet addict to SATC working girl. TCB. Anyway I better go and find something more appropriate to wear to work than pink polkadot PJ bottoms and a red Kon Tiki t-shirt [an old one of Max's he gave me!]

xx Lektrogirl

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #15

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 07:18:00 +0000

Dear All

Before posting my Father's opinions here from his latest email, I just want to re-iterate that they are MY FATHER'S opinions and not mine although I cannot speak for my sub-editor. Indeed - they may not even be my father's opinions either, he maybe just be saying them for comedy effect...

-----

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 18 August 2008 01:34
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: MY ADDRESS IS the HOUSE WITH A BIG RED LIGHT SHINING OUT OF THE PORCH

tHANKS FOR THE WORDS/INFO. i MUST BE A GREAT RELIEF TO YOU TO KNOW YOU HAVE THE RENT AND TUCKER COSTS COVERED. Fark. You know why the expletive? I think my 83 rd year will be the last of controlled intelligence?
One other thing that springs to mind, you must gain great confidence in yourself that you are still elligble, and able to apply for, a,d get, a good job. I' m happy for you any how.
All I can say about the Olympic games is spectacularly boring. The Chinese are so far up themselves I'm sure they can taste their own faeces on the back of their toungue. Nothing unsual, really thet use their own shite to manure thier own home grown salad and veges. They sprinlkle glitters on the turds to make them more attractive! To smell or eat? I' m not sure. Cheers mate. 2 quick questions,
1.Where is your email computer?
2 When's the best time for you to recive.
3What is your mobile phone number? I'd HATE TO BE SENDING VITAL INFO TO THE THIEVING GIT WHO NICKED YOUR PHINE. fARK AGEN. Cheers mate. Luv yer. Take care. Put a mouse trap by the edge of the bed, be suprised what the XXCENSOREDXX man 'll get caught in it? At XXCENSOREDXX he'll prolly need a rat trap? Dadxxxx The comp just told me when I went to sign off that my message had not been sent. and that was after it had already told me it had sent it. so Ill send it again in case the F.R.E.D!

-----

xx Lektrogirl

SUNDAY LUNCH

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 18:56:00 +0000

laptop_lunchbox 2007.01.04, originally uploaded by amanky.

Well I have to admit that my Sunday feast looked nothing like this but I forgot to take pictures. What a loser! But it looked so amazing. Then we ate it.

I made:

Slow cooked shredded pork belly with wine with chicory and cornichons.
Carrot, cumin and harrisa dip.
Potato dauphinoise.
Norwegian cucumber & dill salad [The Cardinal's recipe]
Plus there was like olives, bread, cheese, anchovies etc.

I'm so sad there were no pictures cause it really was a sight to behold. And I was told that it was an excellent lunch. Thank god.

Here is the Cucumber Salad recipe that I made which The Cardinal confirms is similar enough to hers. Only we both only make about a quarter of it.

Cucumber Dill Salad

4 large cucumbers
1 cup cider vinegar
1/4 cup granulated sugar
salt and black pepper, to taste
1 medium red onion, thinly sliced and broken into rings
3 tbs. fresh dill, finely chopped

- Wash the cucumbers and partially remove their peel in lengthwise strips, using either a vegetable peeler or the tines of a fork. Make sure to leave a bit of dark green skin between each stripe.

- Thinly slice each cucumber. Place the slices in a large non-metal bowl and pour on the cider vinegar, sugar, salt, and pepper. Stir or toss the mixture gently until the sugar is dissolved.

- Add the onion slices and fresh dill, then toss well to combine. Let the mixture marinate for at least half an hour before serving.

- It's best to serve any leftovers at room temperature. So refrigerate any remains, but let the seasoning be enhanced by a little time on the table before dining.

Hopefully it looks a bit like this:

I LOVE COOKING.

I feel like this today!

xx Lektrogirl

PRON

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 10:43:00 +0000

PRON, originally uploaded by pilgrim' s progrock.

HERE'S TO SWEET DREAMS

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 22:39:00 +0000

with love from the countryside, originally uploaded by favoriet.

One one hand my fingers smell of garlic and the other fresh ginger [already preparing for tomorrow! Shit if I get blown out...] and I will go to bed in a minute and try and get bored to sleep. Why I don't cook more often I don't know. I absolutely love it. But it really is a grind cooking for just me.

CRAZY DAY

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 20:44:00 +0000

opp7, originally uploaded by carsick.

Today was all weird!

And I think that even the dog Coco upstairs is feeling it cause it won't stop barking.

I was walking along the street today and saw this:

I was on my way to Archgate for the usual but ended up having a falafel instead - a big mistake I thought. Then when I got home, Alex T rang to tell me all about going to an Art gallery and the conversation ended with him promising to punch me in the stomach if I ever got pregnant by anyone which is a sweet relief cause I don't think I could handle going to the dry cleaner and asking for one of those horrible coat hangers [they also ruin your clothes]drinking gin and eating green paw paw all in a hot bath. I think I would rather have Alex T punch me in the guts as hard as he can. I would even like it if he took a little run up. How that conversation happened I don't know and on that note we rang off from one another and I went to Waitrose cause I'm cooking a lunch for a friend tomorrow. I hope it turns out good cause he is on a par with the food fascism. I am just as guilty. Though I can't say what I am making now cause it is meant to be a surprise.

NOT the fire I am about to talk about.

On my way to Waitrose though, an old man scrunched up a piece of paper and set it alight and buried it in a huge pile of dry twigs outside someone's apartment under an overhanging tree on Magdala Avenue. I just watched him do it. As the flames rose and started licking the tree I was on 999 straight away and calling telling them my story. The owners of the house came out in the meantime and threw some water and kicking the bush stamping out the fire. I went up to them and told them what I had seen the old dude do. He was still sitting at the bus stop watching what was going on. He started yelling that he didn't do it. The guys from the house were calling him a fucking mental. The fire truck arrived. I needed to poo [sorry TMI!] so I went off to McDonald's. Etc.

And speaking of weirdness! You'll never guess who Japper's fancies like mad!! HOUSE!!! She said he is totally DREAMY! And she said the reason she fancied him is cause he is like EXTREME XXCENSOREDXX. Fucking LOLZAPOLLOZA!! Really good one. I wonder if I have to XXCENSOREDXX more of that.

And in further weirdness, I had a Internet chat with a friend who was in an Internet café at a nudist beach where he was hanging out with his father and his father's boyfriend. If I thought about it too much, I started tripping.

Anyway I hope you had a happy day everyone cause mine was pretty awesome in it's own little way. I'm not going out tonight though I was going to go to that thing The Cardinal and Antoinette are going to - bugger what is it called?! Can't remember.

xx Lektrogirl

P.S. I hope you appreciated the nice Flickr finds I have exhibited for you too.

ART GALLERY OF MY DREAMS

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 16:45:00 +0000

art gallery 01, originally uploaded by Mang25.

TV FACE [TM]

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 18:57:00 +0000

TV Face [TM], originally uploaded by Lektrogirl.

Yer you know what it is tonight? I know you are all gagging for it - fuck Acid On Sea IT IS LAW AND ORDER SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT NEW SERIES EPISODE TWO and I will be in bed looking like this watching NCIS in anticipation working myself up into a fever, erupting all over LAW AND ORDER SVU and basking in the after glow of whatever else is on then - I think another Law And Order - either Criminal Intent or the other one.

BRING IT ON.

I got a new computer at work today. I showed my guns and carried the new monitor and hard drive up four floors one in each arm without a rest to the top like a true Aussie hero. Not cause I had to but cause I wanted to. And if I got a thirst for it I would have cracked a Solo - light on the fizz so I could slam it down fast. That was an Aussie joke BTW. Only Caz might know it.

The best thing about my new job is knowing that I can sleep in tomorrow. That feels better than being able to sleep all day every day. Seriously.

Anyway I now need to pretend I need to do some random chores [I do need to but I so cannot be bothered] and will go get ready for my TV viewing.

xx Lektrogirl

YERRR

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 22:46:00 +0000

am90_burger, originally uploaded by marisaolson.

I'm so hungry I could eat an old shoe.

Oh yeah and today at work continued with further tribulations. The light relief was provided by talking about videos like this:

I mean FFS!!! 'Chrome Dome' YGM. Not on.

And I know it isn't funny or clever to swear, I can't help but refer to this track Move Bitch by Ludacris

cause I am so feeling it right now about a few people, piles of paperwork, maybe even myself.

I had a coconut macaroon today from Laduree and it was gross.

xx Lektrogirl

FFS

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 08:00:00 +0000

Appointment at work this morning that I got up at 7am for cancelled.

Just to let the universe know though, I was in the office at 8.55am - and this will NEVER happen again.

Spluch: Toilet-Themed Restaurant

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 06:40:00 +0000

>Spluch: Toilet-Themed Restaurant

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #14

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 06:38:00 +0000

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 August 2008 03:20
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: first day down, This is in answer to your first day down' a good learning day, and lots of quids to come?

I know rour'e busy etc. but you are the only one who has the brightest and appreciative of the 'rare' vulgaruty that sneaks into my writing. I don't have control over it, it just overflows as from a carbuncle pussing out of an infected follicle. God help us!
Our boss stopped me yestertday looking all harrassed and worn out, I asked "what's up Chook" To which she replied this place gives me the 'effein shits' (quote, unquote)
Evidently the Salvo's are giving her a hard time, which is easy for them , because they think they've got God on their side, What a load of bollocks?
The two chaplains are very pleasant folk, they are from the south of Edinburgh.
'Borderers' to be precise. Still they are Scottish and are fairly understanding of my antipathy to religion when I relate my earl days in Glsgow being a protestant at a predominantly Catholic school. My brothers and I gave blood noses to Catholic abusers every day we gathered in the playground for recess. Even the shit faced girls used to call out 'Protestant Bastards'
But that was a lot of yesterdays ago my little friend.I remember give ing one shiela a bit of a dunt up the arse to help her into the classroom for wittering shit at me.
Miss King sent me for the strap and book for violence on a female. She larraped six of the best on my hand. Which was fair enough. W hen I think of my father, thumping shielas isn't really fair play.
Itried deleting all my previous emails theother day, yours and mine but the flamin printer took a hand in printing the saved in drafts tray.
Some of the reading from each other is a good laugh!
Specially bits about what hangs in and out of best? Don't tell me youve relaxed you guard and let the big fella have a serve? Fark, (exactly)That's enough of your expensive time. I hope it get's more interesting for you mate? Luv ex PaXXXX.

HOUSEWORK

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 20:07:00 +0000

At my new job I have been TCB - [learnt this from Bok Bok via Manara - Take Care of Business.] Basically, getting stuck into some long overdue paperwork house keeping so that I can get cracking with my job properly. So sorting, filing, researching, asking questions, updating computers etc etc. The people I work with are super nice and couldn't be more helpful - but for those of you who read my blog who have ever had a job [so that would be 90% the girls, 30% of guys who have had 'real jobs' 30% of guys who have kind of had 'pretend jobs' that were just like DJing for cash or something but it still counts - the left over girls and 40% men you won't get this] - you will understand that a new job is always A LOT; Working out if you wore the right thing, who will be your allies, how everyone has their tea, how long you can talk on the phone without looking like a slacker, can you install Miranda/Trillion etc... S.T.R.E.S.S. And of course, overcoming my Internet addiction and having to drink cows milk for the time being out of an ugly cup. [How long can I leave it before I can bring in my own china teacup for plunger coffee without everyone thinking I'm a tosser but thinking I'm cool and quirky? YGM?]

So the following song, Let There Be House, is dedicate to me and my new job.

This song also holds some very deep connections to my life back in Tasmania. When this record first came out, I bought the 12" and went totally nuts listening to it over and over and dancing all the stresses of my life out in the hallway on Mum's new carpet. I was in year 11 or 12 - so 16 or 17. I was the bane of Mum's life - because the carpet was so new and woolly, one dance session would kick up all the new fluff of the wool - virtually tumble weave - that she would go round clucking and picking up spluttering at me "Stop It!! You are kicking up all the carpet!! You will dance a hole in the carpet!!"

Listening to this song again now is a really great de-stress session for me. On top of the new job and the heartbreak over the Chanel lipstick really not being up to scratch, I had a fucking shit start to the week over really weird weird stuff that has also been on my mind. I just feel so much is in the bin right now - more like hard knocks from other people's misplaced weirdness - and like my astrology said today - 'just let it be like water off a duck's back' which is true, but when I'm super stressed/tired about a new job its hard. I went out to dinner with Max tonight and he asked me about all my woes [I cried in China Town - AGAIN! - FFS!! I really must be hitting menopause!!] and it was so nice to be sitting with one of my oldest bestest craziest friend 'chewing the fat'.

Something to look forward too though! I am going to Nantes to see Puyo Puyo and Eva on the 18th October for a gig there. WOOHOO. I don't know who else is playing but I am sure it will be excellent. I haven't seen them since I met them in Liege - the same night I met Lu and Bernd from Mash Gordon. FUCK ME!! THAT WAS A PARTY!! Yerrr...

SOMETHING NICE TODAY

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 06:54:00 +0000

Jo Made This, originally uploaded by Lektrogirl.

Something nice today as nice as this that I can look forward to that is nice, please.

Thanks

xx Lektrogirl

CONSUMER COMPLAINT

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 21:51:00 +0000

Dear Ms Chanel

I wanted to write a letter of complaint to you regarding two maquillage products I have purchased from one of your concessions recently, in Selfridges.

Based on the fact that the two 'rouge a lèvres' I purchased were similar to a Christian Dior lipstick I had stolen from me a while ago, I felt confident with the assurances from the marketing of your brand with the two colours I walked out of the store with would be more than adequate to mend my broken heart.

However I am bitterly disappointed on the performance of your product. My Christian Dior lipstick in Indian Red, even though was years old had maximum coverage, staying power and an intensity of colour that made all men turn in the street. Both lipsticks I bought from you - Passion and New York Red - are greasy, slippery, bleed and last about 20 minutes before needing another application.

My Christian Dior lipstick was not an impotent monkey dick or a weasley dog's dick of a product and I am indeed inferring that your products are both those things... in fact... maybe even of lesser standing. I rue the day I decided to choose your product over Yves Saint Laurent - which even if the lipstick had been of equal quality, at least it comes in packaging which makes carrying a compact mirror obsolete.

Going forward I shall never be wearing stands of pearls, linking my C's as I doodle on notepads while on the phone or considering getting a chin length bob with a tan.

Yours with a bitter fair well

Emma Davidson

P.S. I'm only bitching about the make up and not the wicked slides I have - they are still rocking!

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #13

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 00:48:00 +0000

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 12 August 2008 01:30
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: re: first day down, a good learning day, and lots of quids to come?

I am here only from desperation. I 'boot' up this wretched machine, one handed I might add, only to find no words of solace from one of my special friends. agen and agen. Ces't La Vie, or in my case the prevailing winds of death!
How did Monday go? Do you have to solicit bodies for jiobs or interview likely applicants for business clients?
You could be lucky and strike a rich young colt, unattached, who welcomes a good looking young 'bird' to hid mayfair condominium(left to him by a maiden aunt who died of a broken heart, because her husband, his uncle, shot through with a young filly with large knockers? Not that kind of luck, me hearty? All I can lay (me eyes on) are mostly older than meFark!
There you are. short no questions of import, except I deleted your address when I WAS CLEANING UP MY MOBILE' SENT AND INBOX LISTS. and I therefore lost your address again. Can't send you any picnics, til you give me yer address agen.
How often do you read yer emails? Why not make it daily just before you vist mrs murphy? Then you won't have any thing pressing on yer liver?
XXCENSOREDXX. XXCENSOREDXX. Jesusus that's big upwards that is. XXCENSOREDXX over the end of the bed?
Email yer dear old dad, who married yer ma so you wouldn't be a bastard, but you've got the makings, without any help from mr. Tho I taught you all I know, Miss Brilliance!
See you later....via this page. L v from yer pa. XXXX

SOCA

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 00:10:00 +0000

SO MY LOVE LIFE

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 23:28:00 +0000

ROTFLOL

xx Lektrogirl

DOUBLE JO

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 22:27:00 +0000

Today I saw Jo Wilson and then had chats with Jappers - it was a double Jo Sunday.

First I had a roast lunch in Stoke Newington and waited for the bus in the pissing rain but we ate this:

Which is better than what I cooked when Mr Chips was here the other night:

LOL the shame.

Then this evening I got some awesome links from Jappers. Firstly this:

Read the LOLDJ's blog about how Drx makes these perpetrators come correct.

Then secondly, if you have the time, read all the stuff below from the Milton Glaser website[and here is the original page here]. It is great! And very fitting cause I start my new job tomorrow with one of the most amazing women in the fashion industry. Even so, I'm quite nervy!! WISH ME LUCK!!

-------

Ten Things I Have Learned
Part of AIGA Talk in London
November 22, 2001

1
YOU CAN ONLY WORK FOR PEOPLE THAT YOU LIKE.
This is a curious rule and it took me a long time to learn because in fact at the beginning of my practice I felt the opposite. Professionalism required that you didn’t particularly like the people that you worked for or at least maintained an arms length relationship to them, which meant that I never had lunch with a client or saw them socially. Then some years ago I realised that the opposite was true. I discovered that all the work I had done that was meaningful and significant came out of an affectionate relationship with a client. And I am not talking about professionalism; I am talking about affection. I am talking about a client and you sharing some common ground. That in fact your view of life is someway congruent with the client, otherwise it is a bitter and hopeless struggle.

2
IF YOU HAVE A CHOICE NEVER HAVE A JOB.
One night I was sitting in my car outside Columbia University where my wife Shirley was studying Anthropology. While I was waiting I was listening to the radio and heard an interviewer ask ‘Now that you have reached 75 have you any advice for our audience about how to prepare for your old age?’ An irritated voice said ‘Why is everyone asking me about old age these days?’ I recognised the voice as John Cage. I am sure that many of you know who he was – the composer and philosopher who influenced people like Jasper Johns and Merce Cunningham as well as the music world in general. I knew him slightly and admired his contribution to our times. ‘You know, I do know how to prepare for old age’ he said. ‘Never have a job, because if you have a job someday someone will take it away from you and then you will be unprepared for your old age. For me, it has always been the same every since the age of 12. I wake up in the morning and I try to figure out how am I going to put bread on the table today? It is the same at 75, I wake up every morning and I think how am I going to put bread on the table today? I am exceedingly well prepared for my old age’ he said.

3
SOME PEOPLE ARE TOXIC AVOID THEM.
This is a subtext of number one. There was in the sixties a man named Fritz Perls who was a gestalt therapist. Gestalt therapy derives from art history, it proposes you must understand the ‘whole’ before you can understand the details. What you have to look at is the entire culture, the entire family and community and so on. Perls proposed that in all relationships people could be either toxic or nourishing towards one another. It is not necessarily true that the same person will be toxic or nourishing in every relationship, but the combination of any two people in a relationship produces toxic or nourishing consequences. And the important thing that I can tell you is that there is a test to determine whether someone is toxic or nourishing in your relationship with them. Here is the test: You have spent some time with this person, either you have a drink or go for dinner or you go to a ball game. It doesn’t matter very much but at the end of that time you observe whether you are more energised or less energised. Whether you are tired or whether you are exhilarated. If you are more tired then you have been poisoned. If you have more energy you have been nourished. The test is almost infallible and I suggest that you use it for the rest of your life.

4
PROFESSIONALISM IS NOT ENOUGH or THE GOOD IS THE ENEMY OF THE GREAT.
Early in my career I wanted to be professional, that was my complete aspiration in my early life because professionals seemed to know everything - not to mention they got paid for it. Later I discovered after working for a while that professionalism itself was a limitation. After all, what professionalism means in most cases is diminishing risks. So if you want to get your car fixed you go to a mechanic who knows how to deal with transmission problems in the same way each time. I suppose if you needed brain surgery you wouldn’t want the doctor to fool around and invent a new way of connecting your nerve endings. Please do it in the way that has worked in the past.
Unfortunately in our field, in the so-called creative – I hate that word because it is misused so often. I also hate the fact that it is used as a noun. Can you imagine calling someone a creative? Anyhow, when you are doing something in a recurring way to diminish risk or doing it in the same way as you have done it before, it is clear why professionalism is not enough. After all, what is required in our field, more than anything else, is the continuous transgression. Professionalism does not allow for that because transgression has to encompass the possibility of failure and if you are professional your instinct is not to fail, it is to repeat success. So professionalism as a lifetime aspiration is a limited goal.

5
LESS IS NOT NECESSARILY MORE.
Being a child of modernism I have heard this mantra all my life. Less is more. One morning upon awakening I realised that it was total nonsense, it is an absurd proposition and also fairly meaningless. But it sounds great because it contains within it a paradox that is resistant to understanding. But it simply does not obtain when you think about the visual of the history of the world. If you look at a Persian rug, you cannot say that less is more because you realise that every part of that rug, every change of colour, every shift in form is absolutely essential for its aesthetic success. You cannot prove to me that a solid blue rug is in any way superior. That also goes for the work of Gaudi, Persian miniatures, art nouveau and everything else. However, I have an alternative to the proposition that I believe is more appropriate. ‘Just enough is more.’

6
STYLE IS NOT TO BE TRUSTED.
I think this idea first occurred to me when I was looking at a marvellous etching of a bull by Picasso. It was an illustration for a story by Balzac called The Hidden Masterpiece. I am sure that you all know it. It is a bull that is expressed in 12 different styles going from very naturalistic version of a bull to an absolutely reductive single line abstraction and everything else along the way. What is clear just from looking at this single print is that style is irrelevant. In every one of these cases, from extreme abstraction to acute naturalism they are extraordinary regardless of the style. It’s absurd to be loyal to a style. It does not deserve your loyalty. I must say that for old design professionals it is a problem because the field is driven by economic consideration more than anything else. Style change is usually linked to economic factors, as all of you know who have read Marx. Also fatigue occurs when people see too much of the same thing too often. So every ten years or so there is a stylistic shift and things are made to look different. Typefaces go in and out of style and the visual system shifts a little bit. If you are around for a long time as a designer, you have an essential problem of what to do. I mean, after all, you have developed a vocabulary, a form that is your own. It is one of the ways that you distinguish yourself from your peers, and establish your identity in the field. How you maintain your own belief system and preferences becomes a real balancing act. The question of whether you pursue change or whether you maintain your own distinct form becomes difficult. We have all seen the work of illustrious practitioners that suddenly look old-fashioned or, more precisely, belonging to another moment in time. And there are sad stories such as the one about Cassandre, arguably the greatest graphic designer of the twentieth century, who couldn’t make a living at the end of his life and committed suicide.
But the point is that anybody who is in this for the long haul has to decide how to respond to change in the zeitgeist. What is it that people now expect that they formerly didn’t want? And how to respond to that desire in a way that doesn’t change your sense of integrity and purpose.

7
HOW YOU LIVE CHANGES YOUR BRAIN.
The brain is the most responsive organ of the body. Actually it is the organ that is most susceptible to change and regeneration of all the organs in the body. I have a friend named Gerald Edelman who was a great scholar of brain studies and he says that the analogy of the brain to a computer is pathetic. The brain is actually more like an overgrown garden that is constantly growing and throwing off seeds, regenerating and so on. And he believes that the brain is susceptible, in a way that we are not fully conscious of, to almost every experience of our life and every encounter we have. I was fascinated by a story in a newspaper a few years ago about the search for perfect pitch. A group of scientists decided that they were going to find out why certain people have perfect pitch. You know certain people hear a note precisely and are able to replicate it at exactly the right pitch. Some people have relevant pitch; perfect pitch is rare even among musicians. The scientists discovered – I don’t know how - that among people with perfect pitch the brain was different. Certain lobes of the brain had undergone some change or deformation that was always present with those who had perfect pitch. This was interesting enough in itself. But then they discovered something even more fascinating. If you took a bunch of kids and taught them to play the violin at the age of 4 or 5 after a couple of years some of them developed perfect pitch, and in all of those cases their brain structure had changed. Well what could that mean for the rest of us? We tend to believe that the mind affects the body and the body affects the mind, although we do not generally believe that everything we do affects the brain. I am convinced that if someone was to yell at me from across the street my brain could be affected and my life might changed. That is why your mother always said, ‘Don’t hang out with those bad kids.’ Mama was right. Thought changes our life and our behaviour. I also believe that drawing works in the same way. I am a great advocate of drawing, not in order to become an illustrator, but because I believe drawing changes the brain in the same way as the search to create the right note changes the brain of a violinist. Drawing also makes you attentive. It makes you pay attention to what you are looking at, which is not so easy.

8
DOUBT IS BETTER THAN CERTAINTY.
Everyone always talks about confidence in believing what you do. I remember once going to a class in yoga where the teacher said that, spirituality speaking, if you believed that you had achieved enlightenment you have merely arrived at your limitation. I think that is also true in a practical sense. Deeply held beliefs of any kind prevent you from being open to experience, which is why I find all firmly held ideological positions questionable. It makes me nervous when someone believes too deeply or too much. I think that being sceptical and questioning all deeply held beliefs is essential. Of course we must know the difference between scepticism and cynicism because cynicism is as much a restriction of one’s openness to the world as passionate belief is. They are sort of twins. And then in a very real way, solving any problem is more important than being right. There is a significant sense of self-righteousness in both the art and design world. Perhaps it begins at school. Art school often begins with the Ayn Rand model of the single personality resisting the ideas of the surrounding culture. The theory of the avant garde is that as an individual you can transform the world, which is true up to a point. One of the signs of a damaged ego is absolute certainty.
Schools encourage the idea of not compromising and defending your work at all costs. Well, the issue at work is usually all about the nature of compromise. You just have to know what to compromise. Blind pursuit of your own ends which excludes the possibility that others may be right does not allow for the fact that in design we are always dealing with a triad – the client, the audience and you.
Ideally, making everyone win through acts of accommodation is desirable. But self-righteousness is often the enemy. Self-righteousness and narcissism generally come out of some sort of childhood trauma, which we do not have to go into. It is a consistently difficult thing in human affairs. Some years ago I read a most remarkable thing about love, that also applies to the nature of co-existing with others. It was a quotation from Iris Murdoch in her obituary. It read ‘ Love is the extremely difficult realisation that something other than oneself is real.’ Isn’t that fantastic! The best insight on the subject of love that one can imagine.

9
ON AGING.
Last year someone gave me a charming book by Roger Rosenblatt called ‘Ageing Gracefully’ I got it on my birthday. I did not appreciate the title at the time but it contains a series of rules for ageing gracefully. The first rule is the best. Rule number one is that ‘it doesn’t matter.’ ‘It doesn’t matter that what you think. Follow this rule and it will add decades to your life. It does not matter if you are late or early, if you are here or there, if you said it or didn’t say it, if you are clever or if you were stupid. If you were having a bad hair day or a no hair day or if your boss looks at you cockeyed or your boyfriend or girlfriend looks at you cockeyed, if you are cockeyed. If you don’t get that promotion or prize or house or if you do – it doesn’t matter.’ Wisdom at last. Then I heard a marvellous joke that seemed related to rule number 10. A butcher was opening his market one morning and as he did a rabbit popped his head through the door. The butcher was surprised when the rabbit inquired ‘Got any cabbage?’ The butcher said ‘This is a meat market – we sell meat, not vegetables.’ The rabbit hopped off. The next day the butcher is opening the shop and sure enough the rabbit pops his head round and says ‘You got any cabbage?’ The butcher now irritated says ‘Listen you little rodent I told you yesterday we sell meat, we do not sell vegetables and the next time you come here I am going to grab you by the throat and nail those floppy ears to the floor.’ The rabbit disappeared hastily and nothing happened for a week. Then one morning the rabbit popped his head around the corner and said ‘Got any nails?’ The butcher said ‘No.’ The rabbit said ‘Ok. Got any cabbage?’

10
TELL THE TRUTH.
The rabbit joke is relevant because it occurred to me that looking for a cabbage in a butcher’s shop might be like looking for ethics in the design field. It may not be the most obvious place to find either. It’s interesting to observe that in the new AIGA’s code of ethics there is a significant amount of useful information about appropriate behaviour towards clients and other designers, but not a word about a designer’s relationship to the public. We expect a butcher to sell us eatable meat and that he doesn’t misrepresent his wares. I remember reading that during the Stalin years in Russia that everything labelled veal was actually chicken. I can’t imagine what everything labelled chicken was. We can accept certain kinds of misrepresentation, such as fudging about the amount of fat in his hamburger but once a butcher knowingly sells us spoiled meat we go elsewhere. As a designer, do we have less responsibility to our public than a butcher? Everyone interested in licensing our field might note that the reason licensing has been invented is to protect the public not designers or clients. ‘Do no harm’ is an admonition to doctors concerning their relationship to their patients, not to their fellow practitioners or the drug companies. If we were licensed, telling the truth might become more central to what we do.

NOT MY IDEA

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 22:19:00 +0000

xx Lektrogirl

P.S. Pippa's feet.

BLU TAK COCK GRAFFITI

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 20:46:00 +0000

Blu Tak Cock Graffiti, originally uploaded by ..Philippa...

I have been waiting for The Cardinal to Flickr this for some time so I can blog it. It is so LOLS.

xx Lektrogirl

RANK ALERT

noreply@blogger.com (Lektrogirl) — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 00:55:00 +0000

WARNING

I said I wouldn't post another one of these every again but I couldn't resist. The other night after watching a plethora of cyst videos on YouTube and having Facebook chats with a nice friend, I then when to bed and called my friend for further conversation where he was continuing to watch these videos and describing everything that was happening in them - I was watching these videos by proxy! Oh what a happy heart. Anyway this one sounded SO GOOD that I had to get the link and sure enough it was in my inbox this morning for me to enjoy [I had garlic stuff olives and cherry tomatoes for breakfast with a cup of English Breakfast tea.]

Anyway if you don't have the stomach to be checking out the video above, I will explain briefly that it is someone with a tooth abscess squeezing the bloody puss into her own mouth. It is fucking RANK.

In other news, my big Saturday night was Mr Chips and I making Facebook videos for a number of friends. Apologies to those who received rather weird videos [Mrs Kipling and Cazza for example]

Night night beautiful people. I want to go and have sweet dreams.

xx Lektrogirl