Hello! Bonjour! Willkommen!

August 5, 2008

BOOTY PEOPLE


booty people, originally uploaded by bootycarrell.

Oh Hamburg family. I miss you. But I cam closer to you than you may think! Today I got some good news.

When I got home, I realised I had my knickers on inside out all day! Oh what a moron. But I think it is only unlucky when you put your knickers on back to front. I have to check with my Dad on that.

xx Emma

July 20, 2008

HERE’S MY FRIEND SARATEA


floridaoct, originally uploaded by saratea.

No relation to Alex, and only internet friends cause we never met. But I suspect sneakily from her pictures that we are quite similar.

I have to say a big thank you to Marisa and Sara though who both have commented on the most recent Leica selfportrait that I don’t look ming.

Today has been totes weird. Well let’s make that the last week. I feel like an eaten mango all turned inside out. I had to ask the Fambles to come over and just lie and watch TV with me for a half hour to get some normality back in my day. I spend too much time on my own in this house and end up telling people all kinds of dark things in the middle of the night that are too freaky [in a Rick James kind of way if he was into S&M] or crying over spilt milk.


Went to WORK IT with The Cardinal and Lord Fauntleroy, met up with Carri and bumped into Antoinette. Antoinette and I bragged about the fact we had no bra on each and flashed our boobs to each other then got a bit seductive with the dance moves – not overly though. Please don’t start sending in requests for pictures YGM. I have to say however that if I was to turn that way inclines, Antoinette would be one of the first babes I hit on. Only after drinking a bottle of Malibu myself and plying her with another. Lord Fauntleroy pissed me off again by lecturing me on how shit Garage is and that it isn’t a real dance music cause it is for the waist up only and proper dance music is for the waist down. For dancing like one of the Marley’s. Then he did this very cool dance that illustrated his point succinctly. For such a total nerd he is a pretty special creature. But we both know that we are a total different species to one another so I don’t think we will be going on a date any time soon. Nevertheless he is exactly the kind of friend I need. Except for the part where he told me I was a waist up dancer and he was disappointed. I told him that he was just cramping my style. Please Booty Carrell at this juncture stand up for me cause you know me so well.

xx Lektrogirl

OH YERRR AND FUCK ME – who was the cunt who thought it would be a funny idea to play Midnight Request Line or whatever that dubstep horror song is called and ruin my WHOLE party vibes. SO BAD. GIVE IT A FUCKING REST.

December 10, 2007

THE START OF A NEW WEEK

Back from Germany the two cake plates I had tried to pack in my suitcase got smashed, but the matching cups and saucers survived. It felt like a knife through my heart when I pulled the shards form my suitcase. It really broke my heart. I get upset over the most stupid things.


Hamburg was absolutely incredibly as ever. I had an amazing birthday party. I also had incredible times with everyone who came – Manara, Goon & Koyote, Cardinal and Pip who I met for the first time. So loving it. But I also really enjoyed the time I got to spend on my own walking around familiar streets thinking about my own things an contemplating all the big things that have changed in my life recently. I’m really looking forward to next year.


I was so lucky to have my Spiritual Guru so close to give me such wise advice. Booty gives the best advice about all problems. And his advice is so obvious and fitting that I always end up feeling stupid and embarrassed for having asked the question in the first place.

I wanted to write all amazing things about the trip and the stuff we did and the incredible jokes and the things I bought but I’m already too exhausted from only one day back at work. Then I got on the AIM to XXCENSOREDXX who told me that over pizza, XXCENSOREDXX told him that I was selfish and a bad friend. We nearly came to ignoring each other for 6 months again but I can’t be bothered.

Cardinal has invited me to a Christmas karaoke thing on Friday night which I hope I have time to go to. Thursday night is Pippa’s birthday and Noel Fielding’s art exhibition opening. What the hell can his stuff be like? Wednesday is dinner with Pascale and Reuben [I hope!!!] and Tuesday night is the work Christmas party. Can’t wait to go home. Mum says it is 32 degrees centigrade. Read it and weep.

I also have a great story to tell about an amazing dinner I had with Deano from Real Gold tonight after I dropped off some Limited Edition Katharine Hamnett t-shirts to his store on Ganton Street in Soho. He has t-shirts that have just come from the printers in colour ways that were only printed in colour ways of 4-6 each. We went to Bodeans and had burnt back ends but that is a whole other thing and really I’m tooooo tired.

Until I get the chance to write again, here is a porcine porcelain gift to all my fans

xx Lektrogirl

December 9, 2007

MAN ON FIRE


Last night Booty and I kicked back at his crib and watched a DVD he had bought at Lidl starring Denzel Washington. Through this whole movie we were both transfixed by the script, the narrative, the charactarisation. The whole thing was tantamount to a spiritual experience. Even though I’m a true believer in Wesley Snipes I have to give some creds to the Denzel. It was such a convincing portrayal of a man gripped by seeking revenge that it was like watching a documentary. Passionate.

Speaking of spiritual experiences I fell asleep on the sofa before dinner listening to Kontakte by Stockhausen. It was pretty good. It was nice cause I was so sleepy and everytime I got to the edge of sleep XXCENSCOREDXX laughing would come into my mind and I was imagining what it would be like to kiss him. The best dreaming ever.


Speaking of men, I had another rendezvous here with a guy I have been in contact with a lot via email. Sadly it didnt turn out to be as fun as the one with XXCENSCOREDXX the other night. This meeting ended up being a long story about a saxphone that covered two continents, family members, old friends, the yamaha music website and even though I said ‘cut to the chase’ it was unfortunate cause the story still goes on. Then the man I was with went on to tell me about a time he was so drunk that he was telling a mutual friend of ours he didnt like her boyfriend and should try with him and really she is so beautiful etc… She was only a few seats away at the table. I didn’t really feel in the mood for the vibes after that.


Last night I had better luck with the waiter at the restaurant where Viktor, Booty and I went for dinner. Tony couldn’t keep his hands off me and was calling me ‘Beautiful Emma’. Well state the obvious mate, but at least he was making an effort.

Things with nameless seem to be improving. Conversations are not always about who is such a cunt or who has to do what for something else to happen. I got an SMS from him I guess he was still in Uniqlo saying he couldn’t buy anything there cause it is all made in China and even thoough I’ve explained to him how different mark up systems work and making profit where there is no wholesaler he still said ‘this cashmere jumper is only 39 pounds. Who has paid the price for it to be that cheap? (refering to the workers in China) I’m going to try Smedley tomorrow.’ I was so proud.

More later. Still so much to tell from Hamburg.

xx Lektrogirl

December 8, 2007

SUICIDE

Stockhausen is dead and Booty Carrel no longer has a subscription to The Wire. You’d have to be desperate paying for that. I’m on Booty’s sofa listening with him to Stockhausen’s Helicopter String Quartet. You’d have to be desperate or listening to it for money – in Booty’s case I really hope he is gonna get rich. Booty is writing an obitury for some thing he writes for – zeit.de/musik I’d think I’d jump from the helicopter. How long does this fucking CD go for?

xx Lektrogirl

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