Hello! Bonjour! Willkommen!

January 3, 2011

LADY GARDEN

another couple

To drown out the sound of my upstairs neighbours having sex on their sofa, I am chomping through a packet of Monster Munch as loudly as I can. To follow with the current them of gorging since Christmas day I am keeping up the diet by sharing 8 mini chicken kievs with Hobart while we wait for the Sainsbury’s delivery. I have fared quite well with my holiday diet – alcohol, cakes, chocolate, clafoutis, swigging lemonade from the bottle, biscuits, vietnamese banquets. My cold is not quite better but I am feeling a bit thrushy round the lady garden. Errr diet of crap everyone? You will all be pleased to know I bought a bottle of acidophiles [spelling? too lazy to get off sofa and check.]

In other lady garden news, the Monster Munch were actually in celebration of the fact there were “some signs” from the joint lady garden of Abbie and Lee. Namely, Lee polished off a Milk Tray to herself in 10 seconds. Long awaited but no-one is very excited as this has been the slowest baby in the universe. Let’s hope it makes it out by 2012 shall we?

And even though not in the garden and more in the “top tummy” region, [Dame Edna's best joke ever], a lady friend has some kind of cysty boil on her nipple. Ergh. She is apparently going to the doctor today. All I could say was “Take a picture in case they lance it.” I sent that message and I wanted to send “Please take a video while they lance it” but felt that was on the wrong side of concerned. Instead I spent a while googling images for “nipple cyst”. It has been a while guys hasnt it?!?!?!?! There was something about my lunch of exploding mini kievs that stopped me from watching any videos. Most interesting picture I found was OF A RAT who had a cyst on its nipple WHO CHEW IT OPEN ITSELF.

The rat is apparently called Izzy. I’d like to think as in Stradlin. Probably not.

July 30, 2007

LETTER TO DER-ALEXAN

dear der

im fine. im not with anyone at the moment. im in bed with my laptop, my mobile, my computer phone and my landline and no-one calling me. i dont get lonely cause i have my nintendo DS and i play some games. XXCENSOREDXX did sms me earlier to say he got a text message from a guy telling XXCENSOREDXX that he has to punch me in the face till i bleed or he wont be XXCENSOREDXX’s friend any more.

well there is more to write but i can’t be bothered.

i was having an incredible AIM chat with someone i haven’t spoken to in a while cause when i’m AIMing it is usually to talk dirty with men online and i don’t have much interest in talking to girls at that time. tonight i found out uffie makes my friend feel like she is hanging out with an over sexualised 13 year old. whether that is true or not i don’t know. then we had a chat about french scenesters. my secret AIM girly friend said that they are the worst. and i had to say that i LOVE them and that i love partying in france cause the grenouilles always have good energy party vibes.


a regular night out in paris just casual

i remember cracking up once about ED DMX performing at the ICA shouting to the crowd “everybody put your hands in the air and show how british you are!!” of course not a soul moved but kept doing their regular cool person at a party head nod. typical. there is also a hysterical section in the book “notes from a small island” by bill bryson comparing french desserts with british ones. basically he was saying british people don’t know how to have fun and think to have to much fun is a punishable offence – so as far as exciting puddings go, scones with sultanas are really OTT by british standards. no offence guys, at least in australia we have lamington drives and fairy bread. it’s okay – you can call me a bigot.
مُتَعَصِّب لِرأْي أو لِعَقيدَه фанатик
i really like scones with sultanas. unfortunately the best onese i ever had were in a french breakfast in paris. but it is like cadbury’s chocolate – on appointment to the royal family – it even contains “chocolate flavouring” – really they aren’t doing themselves any favours there are they. i cant think what else could taste like chocolate to make chocolate taste more like chocolate. but then banana flavour isnt banana, it is paint thinners.

i do love british people. you are very weird and i love you.


xx lektrogirl

April 10, 2007

ELBE 76


Beef carpaccio


Pork belly and polenta


Lamb and orange


Wine and home made chocolate

Not only a restaurant but concerts and films. They even do an EARLY BIRD BRUNCH on Sundays for €14,50 or take the Prosecco Refill option for €22,00

ELBE 76 Bismarckstrasse 60 20259 Hamburg
Tel: +49 [for hamburg?] 40 02 35

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