Hello! Bonjour! Willkommen!

August 2, 2011


I have been thinking for a long time wondering when the next blog post will come out of me. After a weird time of thinking about what I like and what I dont like in life generally, about who and I am who I dont want to be, (I think mostly triggered by having a nice boyfriend who is super cool and a major dickhead at the same time just like me – you know so I can seriously CHILL OUT about a lot of thing) lots of things stopped (I deleted everything of mine from the lameatnames.com blog for example but Valeria keeps spreading “the word” there) and I just started collecting cook books and talking at length channeling my cat.

Seriously mates, I can see how those crazy cat ladies end up! It is just too easy. There I will be buried under a mountain of bubble wrap from eBay and etsy stinking of piss, Hobart walking all over me and my boyfriend saying “Dont worry dear” and I poo myself yet again.

But before I get to that level, this space in between I think is called still “growing up” or maybe when you are a grown up it is called “maturing”.

Maybe I was a thick kid but I thought you got to a certain age and that was it. You are a grown up. You have finished growing up. But my experience to date is for that not to be the case. In 18 months when I turn 40, will I have stopped all this “teen angst”? No I dont think so. I hope that I dont turn into one of those smug pricks who are in their 40’s writing for a music paper pretending like teen angst is a thing to laugh at though. Cause all those smug pricks who dress like they are teenagers anyway only have one thing on their side real teenagers dont – and that is perspective through having lived more years. Teen angst still sucks. That is why you see so many pictures of 40 somethings on dating websites taken by themselves on their mobile phone in their little bedrooms. Same thing.

What was I saying?

Actually I wasnt saying it yet but I wanted to get round to cooking. Other than my cat and my boyfriend, this is the thing I think about the most. If I didnt have a job, I would have dinner parties every night and cook and cook all day. The Booyah Cook could make a re-appearance. However I am a bit of quandry – if I want to start writing the cooking on the blog, I really dont want people to accidently end up on a picture of my knickers. Or maybe it doesnt matter.

Health report – Hobart puked over a shitty pair of jeans that Ant was trying to throw in the bin but I wanted to keep for painting. I have an itchy thing behind my ear. Are the two related? I doubt it.

May 7, 2011


I was in Soho today to get a massage in an attempt to get my headache removed. Walking down Charing Cross Road afterwards I popped into one of the second hand bookshops there and was lucky enough to find a copy of a booked that first belonged to Alison Harvey at Xmas in 1943 if the inscription is to be believed. There is a nice notice inside “THE TYPOGRAPHY AND BINDING OF THIS BOOK CONFORM TO THE AUTHORIZED ECONOMY STANDARD”. With a Z. Like Liza with a Z and not Lisa with an S. How strange for a British Wartime Book. Anyway, the book is John Fothergill’s COOKERY BOOK with pages in it dedicated to ENTREES: broad beans, au gratin, cauliflower, cheese rice. EGG SAUCES: asparagus, anchovy, beetroot, cheese, haddock, kipper…


Done hard with graetd onions and chopped fine.


The egg is whill whisked in a cup with some milk, pepper adn salt, and whipped into the soup when it is boiling. Continue to boil for a minute.

This book is both amazing and hilarious.

John Fothergill was a well-known author and innkeeper. If he liked you he would go to great lengths to make you welcome; if he thought you were unworthy of his hospitality, he wasted no time in making that clear.

My new hero.

January 3, 2011

OH HAI 2011

Alone at last, Hobart and I are trying to maintain a positive relationship after her behaviour the last week. My internet searching reveals that:

1. Hobart is very territorial of her house and of me

2. Her tail when it starts to twitch – she really means no

Which is all very depressing because it is quite upsetting when other people come round and she turns psycho on them. I am not ready to have her put down just yet of course.

I dont have any New Year resolutions – except maybe answer the phone even less (GASP!! I can hear from you all already!) and my mantra used to be GET ON THE INTERNET and now more likely it is GET OFF the internet.

Also relevant to kind of NY resolution vibes, but no real kind of resolution, you all know how much I love cooking. You all tell me all the time I am good at it. I dream of having some kind of place of my own sometimes – a cross between Tartes Kluger in Paris, Pain de Sucre in Paris and The Golden Pudel in Hamburg. But then when the computers at work break down over the Christmas break and I have to go in for the second time to fix them I am not sure I want to be running my own business on my own. That kind of stuff is just not appealing. I was going through my old iMac backup drive the other day and saw spreadsheet after spreadsheet after handout after application saved from the days of Lektrolab – as well as some pretty embarrassing old pictures too on FB if you are interested. I dont want to do that. I like mixing the big bowl of cake mix. I dont want to have to fill in a council application form for some health inspector. I cant just “set up shop” like the amazing M Goldstein and wee in a pot when it comes to a place for food. Anyway so the idea is still there, but still needs some ruminating.

Ideas anyone?

December 11, 2010


I’ve been awake since 7.30 today when the Ocado delivery arrived with the balance of ingredients for my baking mission for Lee and Abbie’s pre baby good luck Lee hello baby party.

So far I have made cannele bordelais, half a strawberry, rosemary & pear sponge,  mousse aux fruits, gin and tonic jelly [aka glibber] and I am about to embark on poppyseed biscuits and macarons. For some reason I have also become obsessed with the idea of some kind of panacotta thing. Suggestions on a postcard please really quickly.

Hobart hates me today [or loves me]. So far she has had to endure 2 hours of vintage Mexican love songs and now we are onto Dr Dre. It was with a great pleasure of hers I am sure she stuck her arse right in my face. For those of you who are intimate on Facebook will get to see the picture. Everyone else you will have to miss out I am afraid. If my face was not covered by Hobart’s rear end, I seriously look like a par boiled Christmas ham.

A-Dogg is going to come over tonight and I will experiment with making beetroot spaeztle for a veal and pumpkin stroganoff-esk dinner.

Enough procrastination. I have been avoiding attempting the macarons as I havent made any for a while and I am worried I’ve lost a bit of a hand.

July 13, 2010



But it is taking a lot of work!

There is a guy who has been emailing me a lot, sending me all kinds of compliments. Which is great right? Only I’m not sure how much of his fabulous life is real. I’m naturaly suspicious and I think the worse. It makes me feel like I am being groomed by some internet paedo stalker. I can just see my picture now in The Metro as the embittered woman who has been swindled out of millions by some chancer who leads more than a double life.

I have a date tonight with someone else. After waking up in a quite excited mood, by the time I left the house I have switched into being a mini Phil Thompson on a bad day and have been lashing out at everyone in the office, the other IT guy not the fruity IT guy. It is quite likely I will tell this guy that Im going to “fucking get you,  you fucking cunt” all on my own.

Even though I brought in a chicken and fennel quiche and a raspberry cake, the girls have shut me in my own room to listen to Snoop Dogg all on my own and a screensaver of my number 1 girlfriend which keeps comming on because I am sitting her staring at the screen totally vaguing out.

March 21, 2010


Today I:

  • slept in til 10.30pm
  • half made two shirts – one floral with from a pattern and one white from my head
  • made a pavlova that was a fail
  • made a hazelnut and morello cherry loaf that was a win
  • watched shutter island that was pretty dissapointing
  • avoided the black dog for another day
  • February 9, 2010


    a.k.a. My Love Affair With the Macaron

    So how many people have I told the same story to over and over


    I was talking to Mum on the phone this morning asking her “What other kind of cake is hard and a bit fiddly that you have to practice loads to get perfect and even go to a class?” and she said “Profiteroles?” I told her I already made those and they were easy. Maybe not perfect, but successful enough on the first go to not feel challenged. Sponge cake – I have totally cracked it. I have struggled with cannellés and clafoutis – maybe that is the kind of thing – but nothing like a macaron. If you serve a macaron, people are amazed and always say “HOW DO YOU DO THIS? Is there a mould? Do you drop it into something hot? How do you get it so smooth?” etc etc etc. Anyway I have no clue as to what I will learn in Paris but I am getting HELLISHLY excited. And I feel a bit sick/nervous about it. The confirmation letter even tells you what you have to wear in the kitchen.

    So – with this level of thrill in mind let me tell you first of all about Mrs K MEETING PIERRE HERME at the new Selfies consession where she had to photograph him for work. I had about 5 missed calls from her that day as she attempted to tell me “MOVE YOUR ASS HERE IMMEDIATELY” and as I said in my previous post about it [and apparently MISQUOTED and then got berated for it afterwards and I told her "Okay woah like fine but I will just blow it up all over the blog about how you yelled at me LOL brb gtg my nbff just logged on bye".

    Oh Buddah where was I? Oh - about to eat this gift of personally selected macarons by Mrs K from Pierre Hermés own hand.

    Here are a few views of the macarons at The Cardinals house. Please note the china. Also in bottom photo bottom left please note the sliver of marmite toast available for palate cleansing.

    You may remember if you even care, these were the ones I had in Paris when I was there last from Pierre Hermé shortly after getting silly stringed by three pre teens on a skateboard outside the the Pierre and Marie Curé University mineral and gem museum.

    So The Cardinal and I were in a gifted position to be able to truly assess the macarons in the privacy of her living room in front of an open fire, sipping Earl Grey Tea from china cups and a variety of cutlery to best perform the operations of peeling apart the layers.

    Not the first time I have done this. Remember Nantes?

    Sorry lost in a K-HOLE of macaron reminiscing and checking on the Danish cabbage in the kitchen.

    Back to Pierre Hermé. There seems to be a whole divide between Pierre Hermé vs Ladurée and who's is better and whatever. I am going to say that on the whole, I prefer Ladurée. I like to know that what is labelled as Rose is going to taste like Rose. Admittedly I do admire the adventure of P.H.'s "collections" but I think the ratio there is too much filling to macaron and I am not a big fan of chocolate & fruit together at the best of times. I think they are both marvellous though. The only macarons I ever that that were awful were the ones in Nantes - the really tasted like lipstick, shampoo and shower gel.

    With all this preamble, lets get ourselves to Sunday afternoon when I had a tea at The Crib with a selection of O.G.'s in attendance: Covvo, Alex T [the sub editor], Ella, Fi and the Cardinal. Hobart was also there but her presence was only felt when she scratched the Cardinal and singed her whiskers on a candle. For my guests I presented my take on cream cheese & radish and egg mayonaisse & quails egg sandwiches. Followed by a selection of macarons made in my own exclusive kitchen and two cakes. Oh and Champagne and tea.

    These were Bailey’s and Hazelnut. Total fail in my opinion but Alex T was more than happy to take the ones we didn’t eat home with him at the end.

    These were Campari and Blood orange on the left and Lavender on the right. Both lovely.

    These were Basil, Pinenut & Honey with Lime. They totally cleaned up. Unfortunately they are a visual fail – see the brown bit? Slightly over done but did not affect taste.

    The success of these makes me feel a bit less nervous about the class in Paris. I have to say, I had a very jolly afternoon after heinous weeks at work. The cookbook was planned. I will even be doing a chapter on Chinese food. It will be one page long.

    “Don’t fuck with it and leave it to the Chinese.”

    Although since then, I have been thinking about macaron recipes on that theme.

    My lunch is ready now – braised fennel and Danish cabbage. I’m going to go eat it. You can be rest assured that I will be reporting back in detail from Paris all about how I go. PLUS I have been in touch with Goon already to discuss the restaurants we will be visiting! YERRRRRR.

    xx Lektrogirl

    January 27, 2010


    One day I will bother explaining the ins and out of what it has been like living with Bipolar Mood Affective Disorder [aka Manic Depression that most people use - albeit incorrectly] but frankly it is a drag and a drain IRL so never really feel like blowing the trumpet online. But today as a absolute forced activity to get myself off the sofa I decided to work on my cake invention recipe and perfect it in the aim of sharing it with all of you. I can say categorically that cake eating Hayley at work has nominated this her favourite. She can elucidate her thoughts on every cake I every made and everything that goes into her mouth infinitum so truss, yeah. She knows.

    So after today’s success I feel confident to announce The Booyah Cook has achieved some earth bound status – NOW KNOW AS GODDESS!!

    Since then I have been with Sean Combs on a jet ski in Miami, making it rain up and down the strip in LA, my life is like a movie but if it looks like I’m having more fun than you then sue me. ETC.

    In concept is my favourite bits from different kinds of cakes: super moist vanilla sponge, fresh fruit, clafoutis-esque, lasts a long time. I have tried both a cherry one and a blackberry one. I think it will work with anything like mulberries, figs, fresh apricots or peaches, nectarines – strawberries would taste good but they would look rank.


    1] Grease a 9 inch / 23 cm (ideal size for BDL’s) circular cake tin and dust it with flour. It has to be a loose bottomed or spring loaded tin or when you get the cake out all the fruit is gonna mush up.

    2] Preheat the oven to about 180 degrees C / 350 degrees F

    I would like to say “freestyle freestyle” but the science of silkience will not adjust [remember that ad or is it just Australian? Mrs G?] when it comes to baking cakes. If a recipe recommends a particular tin at certain temperature, and you change either of those things it will impact on your recipe. Maybe even instant fail you.

    3] With electric beaters cream together 120g butter and 120g castor sugar.
    If you never made a cake before, this means mix the two together until the colour changes to a lighter shade and smooths into a paste and isnt all crumbly sugar and icing any more. Can take anything between 5 – 8 minutes.

    4] Add two eggs. Get on the beating again. Mix until the colour changes again. It will end up pretty pale. Takes about 5-6 mins after adding the egg.

    5] Add 240 grams of plain flour and 1 teaspoon of baking powder. Mix it in with a spoon or spatula. Don’t using the electric beaters now. The beaters will over work the flour and make it “tough” and you will end up with a loaf of flat bread. When you have mixed in all the flour, you will have a kind of doughy looking mixture though.

    6] Mix in 6 drops of vanilla essence and 200 mls of creme fraiche with the spoon. It is still gonna be a doughy looking mixture. If you think it is too dry, add 10 mls of milk / water / alcohol whatever but not more.

    7] Tip the mixture in the tin and spread it with the back of the spoon to the edges. Doesn’t have to be smooth, just kind of level.

    8] Cover the top with whatever fruit you want. You are going to bake your cake for a fairly long time. So don’t put anything too small on it and the cake needs to rise underneath the weight of the fruit so make small slices of peaches or whatever. Try the blackberries first though. Awesome!

    9]Put the cake in the oven for 40 minutes. It will most likely have to go in again. Everyone’s oven is different so maybe 40 minutes will be enough. Test like this: Use a skewer and prick the cake right to the bottom in the centre of the cake. If the skewer comes out clean, then the cake should be done. If there is any goo, put it in for another 15 minutes.

    If the middle is gooey but the top has turned brown, turn your oven down 10-20 degrees before shoving the cake back in for the second go in the oven.

    10] Leave the cake too cool a bit in the tin before turning it out. Then leave it on a rack to cook completely before you dust it with icing sugar you sprinkle on through a sieve.


    The end.


    The icing sugar will eventually dissolve into the cake after a while with the moisture. It isn’t even really important to put it on there. Whatever you want!


    xx Lektrogirl

    November 29, 2009


    Non Heart Attack Celebration Cupcakes, originally uploaded by Lektrogirl.

    Hi Folks,

    I have just been baking some red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese icing and Medici chocolate hearts on top in celebration that my Dad seems okay after the heart attack he gave me by having a little heart attack. I got a rather jolly text from the old prick last night:

    “Mite be too early, but stil abord, afta me slight heart attacck. i’m still kickimg 4 march, but not too vigourotsly. Fark busted hips ‘hurt. very much. Tell hoby i lov her and you. Thanks for the double bungd text. Luv from yer old dad, and hnby.”

    xx Lektrogirl

    September 18, 2009


    As I said to Philippa “This cake for Valeria is going to be like Phantom of the Opera crossed with the Olypmic Games opening ceremony and the first few chords of Teardrops”

    Drum rolls til Sunday!

    xx Lektrogirl

    September 6, 2009


    From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@XXCENSOREDXX]
    Sent: 06 September 2009 04:48
    To: Emma Davidson
    Subject: RE: the cardinal and i at the spatisserie at the dorchester

    ‘ere’s me, walked passed the Dorchester 4 million times in my earlier days, never put me foot inside the door. Never had the dosh, and me father would have kicked me arse for having thoughts above my station.
    No wonder that Cardinal is a mate. Except for being slightly thinner faced she looks very much as you do. Long hair, brown?, good looking complexion, etc.etc. won’t continue. YOU will only accuse me of being a ‘dirty old man’
    Anyhow, the tucker(can you call food of that standard ‘tucker’?) It looks fabulous. Seems a good place to move out of the daily tribulations of earing a living. You ought to take Hobart with you? Don’t be mean. slip him in yer carry bag/large purse and let him have a wander. Sorry HER. W.K.O.F. name is Hobart for a female?F.C.S.
    Got an Email ex Sars today and she tells me there’s a parcell in the post, which I’ll prolly get to-morrow. She doesn’t know I know it’s seeds so I can plant things to remind me of you lot. I have planted cuttings of Roses, Iceberg and Bridal shower for your reminder. BIG Sharpish tasting radishes for me. Can’t tell wot I’m putting in for the kids and Sars till I get the package tomorrow.. The prickles on the roses will be for Pussie!.
    Look after yorself Kiddo. Winter’s on it’s way. Keep away from any fukka who has a runny nose or is sneezing. Swine Flu is a bastard. Bad for yer health.Cheers from yer old Dad. Since The Cardinal makes you happy, say hullo to her from me.

    From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@XXCENSOREDXX]
    Sent: 06 September 2009 04:55
    To: Emma Davidson
    Subject: RE: my cooking – macaroons

    P.S. Your cooking you faggot? You nicked them from them from the Dorchester. You ought be doing Nigella Lawson’s job on T/Vif that’s really your cooking. Fark. They look delicious mate. Cheers again. Poppa.xxxx

    September 4, 2009


    Today I couldn’t be bothered going to work on time cause I wanted to have a go at making these instead.

    Campari and Orange Macaroons.
    Grenadine and Fresh Blueberry Macaroons.

    I can’t decide which was better.

    Not to self: when it comes to colouring them, you really cannot hold back on the colour. More is definitely less in this case – which doesn’t often happen.

    The girls at work were really impressed. When I crack the recipe I will Booyah Cook them.

    Then we went for dinner at The Diner. When I got home, I stuck my fingers down my throat after champagne at work, a cocktail, a sailor jerrys with coke and fresh lime and a glass of horrid white wine. I feel a lot better now.

    xx Lektrogirl

    July 22, 2009


    but not single. but feeling alone.

    i am looking online at different lingerie stores seeing what they have in the sales.  it annoys me that you always take my bra off so quickly when you say how much you like it.

    i have to finish straining the gooseberries before i go to bed.

    July 9, 2009


    So, to all my regulators out there: MOUNT UP!

    I know it has been some time since I have given a full detailed report from my kitchen, but for those of you who follow my Flickr will have seen more developments in my kitchen in “my lost months”. But y’all know me, still the same O.G., but I been low key and hated on by most these niggaz wit no cheese, no deals and no G’s, no wheels and no keys, no boats no snowmobiles, and no ski’s & mad at me cause I can finally afford to provide my family wit groceries.

    TODAY THE BOOYAH COOK PRESENTS: CLAFOUTIS! Which just happens to be the easiest of posh desserts that you can make yourself and look truly incredible.

    And I mean like you wanna run around talking bout guns like I ain’t got none – what you think I sold ‘em all cause I stay well off? Now all I get is hate mail all day saying that I fell off. What cause I been in the lab wit a pen and a pad
    trying to get this clafoutis off?

    If you don’t trust my measurements which are still highly confidential and in levels of development stages depending on who’s kitchen I’m cooking in, I suggest you try this one here by Jill Dupliex who also created the recipe for Mini Egg and Bacon Pies.

    To describe Clafoutis – it is like a giant cherry custard pancake and an old school French dish.

    Cherry is the traditional but I even I saw some YouTube video of some New York Jewish Chef where he used Clementines. [Didn't like the look of it but he was into it.] You could use any fruit though – see my suggestions in the secret recipe below.

    500g fresh dark ripe cherries. Don’t take the stones out – they are better left in!
    3 tablespoons of icing sugar
    1/2 cup caster or icing sugar
    1/2 cup plain flour
    3 eggs
    1/2 cup cows milk [not soya - sorry.]
    6 drops Vanilla essence or extract
    Pinch of salt

    The recipe above is the basic. You could also:
    Soak the cherries in kirsch, amaretto or rum for an hour before starting.
    Use apricots and nougat cut into chunks
    Try figs
    Pear and chocolate
    Basically – you see it can be a fruit freestyle.
    Use as much of whatever to cover the bottom of the dish you are using.

    1] Turn on the oven to 175 degrees C.
    2] Grease the dish you want to use with butter and then sprinkle a bit of your 3 tbs icing sugar over the buttered dish.
    3] Put the cherries [pre-soaked in booze or not] in a bowl with the rest of the 3tbs sugar and roll them round til they are coated.
    4] Cover the bottom of your dish with the cherries [or other fruit.]

    5] Use a hand whisk if you have one and a big bowl and mix the eggs and sugar together. A spoon will do but you do look more OG with a whisk.
    6] Add the milk, vanilla and salt and mix again.
    7] Add the flour but don’t mix it too much. Over beating it will make the final thing come out doughy and not custardy. The mixture should be quite runny and not like a thick-shake. If it is, add a little bit more milk.
    8] Tip the batter over the fruit.
    9] Put it in the oven for 40 minutes. It should be all puffy and golden going a bit crisp right round the edges.
    10] Leave it to sit for a little while and it will sink on itself a bit – but don’t leave it too long, it is better eaten warm!

    This recipe is so Booyah I am considering this as the dessert for the next time I have a Lady Gang dinner at my house with the apricots and nougat.

    If you make one, please send me a picture!

    xx Lektrogirl

    May 23, 2009


    I have been in batten down the hatches meltdown mode this week and throwing myself into my work and totally switching off when I get home. Which made it so amazing to see the Lady Gang last night Philippa’s house for the dinner get together we do every so often. I did not take any pictures – came straight from work and had left my camera at home charging. Madame was there in one of Grandfather Lady’s old rubber skirts cut off to secretary length, The Cardinal had on a stunning black dress that was so ladylike she couldn’t reach up to get the canelle tin out of the cupboard, Mrs Kipling is undergoing a skin transformation – she was GLOWING and Mrs G was wearing RIPPED JEANS with the best vintage polka dot scarf from here to eternity. So amazing. Bette was also there and she was being super cute trying to avoid everyone. The drink of choice – Aperol & Prosecco / Cava whatever was opened. CHEESECAKE for dessert [The Cardinal's is legendary you know.]

    Today I woke up at 1.30 wishing for some more Vietnamese Salad that Cards had prepared next to a slice of Spinach quiche. I lay in bed and tried to positively think it into my life but every time I peeked over the covers a side plate had not appeared on the windowsill… So I got up and decided to cook my own quiche with stuff I had in the fridge and freezer.

    So it was a bit random – smoked salmon, braised fennel, spring onion and tarragon but at the same time it was a good combination and I was quite pleased with the results for my first ever quiche. Not as good as Philippa’s but not bad for a beginner.

    In other news, osl.lameatnames.com is going really well – in fact the visits are blowing up so much so that valeria and I are sharing the hosting of files around three or four different sites trying to scrabble up some space. Oh shit – that reminds me I wanted to tell Pippa something about hosting videos. Brain ache now but I will do it tomorrow or later.

    Oh yeah – Pippa and I had to have THAT conversation. The one that had been brewing for a while. We had kind of seen it coming but we never actually said anything to each other about it until last night. VINCENT D’ONOFRIO IS FAT!! I said I would still blow him, but as Pippa said “He has turned into a real man mountain.” Anyone else checked him out in series 8 of Law and Order: Criminal Intent? He always had a lot of screen presence – now he totally hogs the camera! [OJ LOL]


    I’m gonna go catch some episodes. Meltdown is manageable. Not the best time at the moment, but the Lady Gang is always a wicked treat.

    xx Lektrogirl

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