Hello! Bonjour! Willkommen!

April 17, 2010

NICE

Another nice mail I got the other week. Sometimes I feel like shit and giving up. So whoever you are – thanks for letting me know you get something out of what I do. It makes me feel great.

    i was linked to your blog months ago and have been reading it daily ever since.

    reading this blog has literally talked me down from the ledge and seen me through the darkest and most crippling hrs of my recent break up.

    thankyou you so much for being so goddamn talented creative hilarious cool witty and styling.

    i dont know how i could have gotten through the last few months without it.

    THANKYOU

In other news last night I went to The Alibi for Deano’s birthday. The whole place smelled like DIY and sawdust which I love very much. And also there was a strong smell of coriander. Stood at the bar drinking all night as I couldn’t quite bring myself to dance to EMF. I met them once. I don’t know who was more of their head – them or me.

March 19, 2010

MY LOVE LIFE

And that is my life. You know it.

January 28, 2010

EDIROL V4 VIDEO VJ MIXER FOR SALE £550

PERFECT CONDITION!!

On sale on eBay now.



November 16, 2008

WHEN IS THERE A DRY SPELL?

I walked back from dinner and he said “Some people are just destined to spend their lives single.” I was laughing and crying with snot and tears down my face I begged him to stop and he said that it was just how it is sometimes. I couldn’t even walk any more and cried and said “This year has been so so horrible. Please stop. I can’t bare it.” And kept laughing too. Someone else said I was emotionally incontinent.

My mother called and told me she had read my blog the other day. Before she went on I had to hold the phone away from my ear and shout “No no no please don’t tell me you’ve read it. You can read it if you want but I don’t want to hear what you have to say about it.” Which turned into a big conversation about how on evening at the dinner table she sat their with my sister quoting sections of my diary they found back to me with great hysterics between the two. I was so ashamed. I wanted to die. So it must come as no great surprise then that after that my boundaries on public and private are totally fucked.

I heard some great gossip stories this weekend. I was really laughing hard. I also found some BRILLIANT material for the Sex Attack video.

November 10, 2008

HEARTBEAT


, originally uploaded by sannah kvist.

November 9, 2008

SWALLOWED A STONE

So Sarah and Grissom are no longer together, their relationship withered as he couldn’t make up his mind. Now Grissom is in Lady Heather’s upstairs bedroom asking her to stay. As painful as they are, stories of breaking hearts, lust and longing and dreams that never come true are so attractive to me. And I guess why I end up in the world of lost loves with a pair of kiddies knickers on my dining room table and my heart feels like I swallowed a stone.

That is why I am so in love with some of the pictures I collect for lameatnames.com which I am relieved to say is now back online.

Tomorrow I will continue on my picture framing mission. I have pictures of cancers and illustrations of eruptive fevers from antique books, gems and flowers, naked ladies and drive in porn movie posters. I am looking forward to the next lot of London guests who may come my way. I will also put together a proposal for a video that I would like to make for Appareil for their song “Sex Attack” [which I have blogged about before].

Also in other news: Drx, Role Model and I have all swapped Wii numbers. We can swap Mii’s… I only have two Mii’s at the moment, me and my boyfriend who is a black guy called Wasteman. I made him tall and skinny like Snoop Dogg.

And this from harriet_the_spy is worth a note.


Trying To Start A Meme

What’s the oldest item of clothing you own? I’ve had this PJ top since I was nine or ten and watched my breasts develop under its thin cotton M&S comfort: ‘Take It Easy’ you sheep.

I will get around to doing this one day only I feel disadvantaged cause my really old stuff is at home in Australia and probably in Mum’s polishing rag basket by now. I’m sure to have some old NIKE tops from when I was in my Sporty Spice phase though if I dig deep enough. To elucidate on the Sporty Spice phase: It was actually when I was going to Rephlex Raves “back in the day” wearing things like neon pink Speedo swimming costume with a massive zipper down the back, combat trousers, a red Helmut Lang tulle vest and giant Nike trainers back in 1996. And made up like a cosmetic counter exploded in my face.

xx Lektrogirl

November 2, 2008

MINE

There are some things that I just can’t tell because they are all mine things and I don’t want to share them with you. But take Bryan Adams instead. It’s a banger.

I’m stupidly tired and I can want to sleep and be alone with my dreams.

Tomorrow, I will worry about lameatnames.com – I have been approached by many different people – even a company who wants to assist because they think I can help them with amateur porn on the iPhone. Yeah big business.

I have two friends with a crisis each and I must assist them – one can’t cook and the other one can’t fuck someone cause she love him too much [a generalisation].

xx Lektrogirl

October 28, 2008

STORY OF MY LIFE

I don’t know how fucking depressing it is to have to realise that something someone promised you they would do FOR TWO YEARS is never going to materialise and you have to do it yourself, even though you knew all along they were never going to do it and you would have to end up doing it yourself like every fucking thing you ever had to do the whole time you were with them.

H.M.L. TOTES!

xx Lektrogirl

FUCKING HELL!!! WHY IS IT WHEN I THINK LIFE IS TOTALLY LOST AND OVER I FIND SOMETHING ON YOUTUBE THAT MAKES ME THANK THE LORD FOR AMATEUR VIDEO PRODUCTIONS WITH AN EYE ON PROFESSIONALISM?!!

Oh I take back what I said about H.M.L.

September 25, 2008

NOT ONLINE A LOT

As I keep saying I haven’t been online a lot lately. I have been feeling so shit you really cannot believe. It is my old friend “Lost At Sea Feeling” back again. If you have these times too, then you will understand. Hopefully you do, cause that will mean you are normal. But yeah, I have even thought about killing this blog. I started off not giving a fuck about what I wrote on here and telling great gossips and having a laugh. But has timed has moved on, I have found myself biting my tongue more often and thinking “Fuck should I say that?” and deleting half a paragraph. And that isn’t why I started this blog in the first place. It was never meant to be a music blog, or a look at my H&M outfit blog, or anything, it was just supposed to be my place to sit down and chat away. Rather than have 4 AIM windows open and FB all running at the same time. What I find disturbing is why do I suddenly give a fuck even?

My relationship with my longest love is going through a rocky time. The relationship feels pretty empty and soulless at the moment? Maybe it is the weather? Maybe it wasn’t meant to go on forever? Like the old man at Ed’s bar in Chicago [when he was propositioning me to go back to his house and strip so he could look and not touch] said to Paul and I “You too are good for now. Not forever. Just for now.” I am even looking at jobs back in Australia because I am tired of life with my longest love. City of London – I don’t love you like I used to. But then – maybe it is the people I know and don’t want to know any more that are making me feel less inclined to venture out doors and walk your streets in my big black boots.

God – fuck it – I feel like I am living someone else’s life if I can’t talk about my own here.

It is so weakening getting finger fucked by a guy who “doesn’t want a girlfriend” and the only dicking I got is when they dicked me round. XXCENSOREDXX. What a waste of fucking time. It was in essence, my first lesbian relationship. LOLZ.

In other news: another friend told me once that they never wanted to work with someone on particular types of projects and that she wanted it to be ‘our thing’ – I guess she was having a hating on her particular day. Because now time has passed and indeed the two of them are working on something. I’m genuinely happy for my friend. It has put my nose out of joint tho.
So maybe it is my turn to be the possessive lesbian and I should go round finger fucking women like I was the aforementioned man? HA.
Actually I think it might have more to do with my absolute horror about getting forgotten about which stems from childhood favouritism, my parents not coming to a school party, my father missing my swimming tests, bullied at school etc etc. [a moment to cry folks and could have possibly deleted the whole paragraph] And something I definitely will not talk about here. Unless I’m totally drunk and wearing heels.

And speaking of being a lesbian – Max was apparently having a conversation with XXCENSOREDXX about how much I love cock. It is always a bit uncertain with Max when he has a glass of Rosé in his hand as to whether it is Tourette’s at that moment, or he had it while talking to XXCENSOREDXX, or was serious then or laughing now. Either way I found it funny. He teases me constantly about XXCENSOREDXX and how I should get with him. Personally Pippa and I think it is because Max’s wants to vicariously have sex with XXCENSOREDXX himself. The thing about loving cock – Mum if you are reading this – that is what MAX said not me.

And for the first time ever, I will reveal a XXCENSOREDXX by way of a photographic clue:

He is one of the men in this picture. And I am certain that he must find me so attractive sitting here in hot pink polka dot flannel pyjama bottoms, a Silas red t-shirt, and orange Ralph Lauren sweatshirt I cut into a cardigan, powder blue Falke socks and red Chanel flip flips eating banana muffins I cooked for dinner cause I had nothing else in the house whining about my life. So seriously Max’s match making would be worse for him than me.

Yeah I should go to bed. But before I do:

This is the part of myself I absolutely hate hate hate the most. Compared to everything – all parts of me inside and out. This is it. We can all see that I would make an excellent Christmas ham and where the surgeons knife should go or straw or whatever he would do to get rid of the grossness on the inner AND outer thighs.

Hello friend. We are back together again like we should be and I have no secrets from you.

xx Lektrogirl

September 9, 2008

1 GIRL 1 CUP


1girl, 1cup, originally uploaded by nirE cigaM.

Today I am totally heavy hearted. I mean – he’s below your league you need a man ‘you’re a prick you were wrong’ stand up for yourself and don’t let yourself be part of the negative problem ‘you’re being an idiot’ so amazing ‘not impressed’ you can make each other happy ‘he won’t make you happy’ i love you ‘you aren’t attractive any more’.

Everyone – I can’t keep up with you – you are driving me crazy! Which way is fucking up?

The answer to that is neither way. Because ultimately, I’m a nihilist.

xx Lektrogirl

September 8, 2008

DROP THAT ASS


Hydraulic Style – DJ Nasty

Listen to the counter melody? Or does it count as a melody? Or just a synth line? It’s so beautiful! And while you are dropping that ass to the ground – which is something people can do with all ass sizes – we don’t have to be all bootylicious about this – why not check to see who got kicked to the curb lately? It might just surprise you!

I actually untagged this picture of myself on Facebook. I don’t know why I bothered cause I have a totally private profile. I regret untagging it now. Because you know me – Mrs. No Secrets. The last time I was in the Glasshouse was years ago with Nick Phillips / Noodles drinking Ayingerbrau [a.k.a. The Angry Brew] Rail slide down a tube station bench on my shoulder [how I did that I will never know] and throwing up all night bright orange vomit until Noodle’s flatmates thought I was gonna lose a liver. Speaking of Noodles, I saw ANDREW HARTWELL of all people at PIZZA the other night. AND BDL walked past while our whole table got a glacial vibe shower from his girlfriend. AND FOUL PLAY FOWLER. The shame. That hadn’t happened to me since about 1999 when Karl Hutchinson, Chris Chang Towers, Dan Moss and someone else – probably Smiler all rolled into The Bricklayers Arms AND SAT AT THE SAME TABLE. I was there with The Witch at the time choking on my pint. See how much I have changed? I would down pints back then with a full face of make-up with a severe bob and Prada shoes.

I’m off to have more of a living room disco chill out and max out those dance vibes. So much fun.

xx Lektrogirl

August 25, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #16 or so

It’s a dog’s life…

——————————————————————————–
From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 24 August 2008 04:57
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: Your unhappy news.

What a nuisance, for want of a better word. What stupid events has she perptrated to get herself in the dido? Nothing you can do to turn her around? XXCENSOREDXX If you were here in Tas then I could sign over my half of the house, then you could use it as security on a bank loan to create a busines here? Fark knows. Then again you aren’t in a very receptive frame of mind after such bad news.
Keep pecking kid. it ain’t the last job in the world.
Makes me think of Melbourne many years ago. Down to me last 8 bob. Bought a paper and applied to be Salesman for Dalgety’s. Luck would have the Manager, Arthur Pattinson, ask me if I followed the footy. I answered , yes. Carlton. Arthur glowed and sai,”Good I’m a Drector for Carlton. Stood me in good stead for the next 12 years. as you know, or may remember?
Think lucky girl. There’s always a bit of luck around the corner. Like you always say,”what goes around comes around.” Mine is” Think lucky. You’ll be lucky!” Though the golden eagle doesn’t shit too often 0ut of the Lotteries. Strike me lucky. I only want a million to get us started’
See yer kiddo. Chun up and tell t.t.f.themselves.paXXXX

——————————————————————————–

If anyone else was having a bummed out moment, please feel free to take some of my Dad’s advice for yourselves. There is plenty of The G.A.’s vibes to go around.

xx Lektrogirl

August 14, 2008

FFS

Appointment at work this morning that I got up at 7am for cancelled.

Just to let the universe know though, I was in the office at 8.55am – and this will NEVER happen again.

August 13, 2008

HOUSEWORK

At my new job I have been TCB – [learnt this from Bok Bok via Manara - Take Care of Business.] Basically, getting stuck into some long overdue paperwork house keeping so that I can get cracking with my job properly. So sorting, filing, researching, asking questions, updating computers etc etc. The people I work with are super nice and couldn’t be more helpful – but for those of you who read my blog who have ever had a job [so that would be 90% the girls, 30% of guys who have had 'real jobs' 30% of guys who have kind of had 'pretend jobs' that were just like DJing for cash or something but it still counts - the left over girls and 40% men you won't get this] – you will understand that a new job is always A LOT; Working out if you wore the right thing, who will be your allies, how everyone has their tea, how long you can talk on the phone without looking like a slacker, can you install Miranda/Trillion etc… S.T.R.E.S.S. And of course, overcoming my Internet addiction and having to drink cows milk for the time being out of an ugly cup. [How long can I leave it before I can bring in my own china teacup for plunger coffee without everyone thinking I'm a tosser but thinking I'm cool and quirky? YGM?]

So the following song, Let There Be House, is dedicate to me and my new job.

This song also holds some very deep connections to my life back in Tasmania. When this record first came out, I bought the 12″ and went totally nuts listening to it over and over and dancing all the stresses of my life out in the hallway on Mum’s new carpet. I was in year 11 or 12 – so 16 or 17. I was the bane of Mum’s life – because the carpet was so new and woolly, one dance session would kick up all the new fluff of the wool – virtually tumble weave – that she would go round clucking and picking up spluttering at me “Stop It!! You are kicking up all the carpet!! You will dance a hole in the carpet!!”

Listening to this song again now is a really great de-stress session for me. On top of the new job and the heartbreak over the Chanel lipstick really not being up to scratch, I had a fucking shit start to the week over really weird weird stuff that has also been on my mind. I just feel so much is in the bin right now – more like hard knocks from other people’s misplaced weirdness – and like my astrology said today – ‘just let it be like water off a duck’s back’ which is true, but when I’m super stressed/tired about a new job its hard. I went out to dinner with Max tonight and he asked me about all my woes [I cried in China Town - AGAIN! - FFS!! I really must be hitting menopause!!] and it was so nice to be sitting with one of my oldest bestest craziest friend ‘chewing the fat’.

Something to look forward too though! I am going to Nantes to see Puyo Puyo and Eva on the 18th October for a gig there. WOOHOO. I don’t know who else is playing but I am sure it will be excellent. I haven’t seen them since I met them in Liege – the same night I met Lu and Bernd from Mash Gordon. FUCK ME!! THAT WAS A PARTY!! Yerrr…

August 7, 2008

HEAVY

My arms and legs are heavy. I am not sleeping and following the whole story of my dreams has stopped. I only remember tiny details of them remain when I wake – like a freckle on a shoulder or the tail end of a sentence.

And I get spam like this:

—–Original Message—–
From: Blossom Mcfarland [mailto:recombiningmz9@oelinger.com]
Sent: 07 August 2008 15:07
To: emma@XXCENSOREDXX.com
Subject: [SPAM]Re:

It breaks your heart to see the one you love is happy with someone else, but it’s more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you. http://alvs.prosperityanger.com

—–

In Kinshasa I imagine it is very hot and humid depending on the time of year.

xx Lektrogirl

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