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January 11, 2008

YESTERDAY


With recent events in my life, it has taken me a while to get this thing online. I challenge everyone to nominate a better Facebook Grafitti Artist than Nicholas Abrahams. Here he has depicted a more realistic scene than that depicted on my birthday cake. Even though my mother’s work came from actual photographs of R Kelly and I, somehow Abrahams seems to have captured something MORE. WHAT A GENIUS. I would prefer to think we were sucking car exhaust fumes though from a tailpipe than a bong. Cause I don’t do drugs. Maybe something from a V8 engine machine – maybe like a Ford Cobra

or even this

check the number plate!

Just for your information – cars like this are all over still in Australia.

Yesterday was really a nice chilled out day – except for the part where I got really rained on. I went and met XXCENSOREDXX for coffee at Flat White. Oh the coffee was AMAZING. XXCENSOREDXX was quite jealous I new a number of the staff by name. Then off to snoop through Liberty and see what Spring Summer 2008 collections were in store.

Well!! Forget See by Chloe for this season unless you want to look like a 5 year. There were also a number of dresses that looked sneakily too much like other designers collections – one dress in fact was a total Marni knock off. Besides, you know that the whole collection will be ripped off in H&M and Top Shop by next week.

Marni knock off. I remember seeing the Marni one in a magazine which was grey with the grey painterly brush print thinking “Oh that would look great on a fat girl like me.” I actually really liked the Marni one. Maybe I will make my own dress with a cut off t-shirt and some vintage fabric.

Pussy Pelmet. I can tell you know that this is going to be a big look for AW08 – so you better get some big knickers or your filet mignon’s are going to be available to all and sundry. After Liberty I went to see Pippa at Maison B – I wish I had photographed the page out of the A.P.C. catalogue for SS08 cause there is a practically identical dress to this on a far more sour faced girl, except the dress was even shorter. The print was the same colour as well.

Having said that, there was a lot of REALLY NICE A.P.C. stuff in that look book and I’m waiting for my bag that I ordered when I was over in Paris with Max and Pippa in the A.P.C. studio. BRING IT ON!

So after half of an eclair with Pippa, I went up stairs to see the Noel Fielding painting exhibition. I really didnt like about 98% of it. What I do like is that Tania from Maison Bertaux has started curating these exhibitions in the the upstairs tea rooms. I think it is a really wonderful thing.

Anyway – sorry I’m rambling.

xx Lektrogirl

January 7, 2008

XXCENSOREDXX


So, I now have a picture of XXCENSOREDXX and I keep it in my oyster card wallet. When you tap in, you don’t even have to open the card wallet so it isn’t as romantic as it sounds I guess. What is very romantic is that he has my birthday written in his Smythsons birthday book. I am guessing that XXCENSOREDXX is trying to seduce me for my Marni bag.

XXCENSOREDXX and I met tonight and had some incredible gossiping. I heard the most gruesome and fabulous story about two gay men. Gayer 1 went into the bathroom of Gayer 2 and started snooping through the cupboards [as you do. I hate it when you do that and the bathroom cabinet has a massive door bang that you aren't expecting or something] and found some jumbo tampons. Gayer 1 was really confused cause Gayer 2 was living alone and had no sister / friend that would have reason to leave jumbo tampons in his bathroom cabinet. At the time, XXCENSOREDXX and I were eating these layered cakes, the bottom layer seemed to have absorbed a rather large amount of liquid. It was quite strange and was rather unpleasant to eat. Even more so as this story progressed. So Gayer 1 didn’t know what to do. He was curious about the tampons but didn’t know how to ask without appearing as though he had been poking through all the cupboards in the bathroom. Finally Gayer 1’s curiosity got the better of him and his asked Gayer 2 about it who was totally casual and replied “They are like for you know, after fisting I used them for absorbing all the slops.”

I had to put my fork down.

After trying to get away with paying the wrong bill that was 5 pounds cheaper than the correct one, XXCENSOREDXX and I went for an evening stroll to Carnaby Street. I wish again I could make it out to be romantic, but it was just so that XXCENSOREDXX could use the free ATMs there. On the way you will never guess what we saw:


None other than London’s number 1 urban blogger moonlighting in the Agent Provocateur window for some extra cash in a dishevilled Danielle Lloyd WAG wig and an ill fitting bra on the right cup. The pair of mannequins were standing in saw dust pretending to be at the circus. You could almost smell the piss from outside the window.

Finally, check out Pippa’s latest video. I’m not really sure what it is for but my friend Alex looks amazing in it. [She is the one with the doll face and the bobbed hair]

xx Lektrogirl

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