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September 7, 2009

MEAN GIRL

You are possibly the most hideous person I have had the misfortune of knowing and I knew right from the second I met you that you were vile.

Speaking of other mean girls, after trying to walk the kitten on a lead [that is to say get the collar on her and drag her on her side to the back door with it] Hobart has decided payback comes in the form of clawing my new rug which I just rolled out about 15 minutes ago. All the bushels of wool that she is digging up she chews up. My payback will be laughing when she coughs up a fur ball. Then her payback will be my broken heart as I sit and watch her all stressed and worried that I have to call the Pet Ambulance. And when she is okay again I will feed her some THRIVE freeze dried shrimps.

I had a funny evening this evening with Mr 40something who had obviously had a very boozy lunch and was telling me how life was so horrible and depressing and stressful. He also said that I did nothing but take the piss out of him. But that I was also the person who was the most polite and respectful to him as well. [Aussie humour.] Then he asked me if I wanted a glass of wine. Worried he might have a sex den in his basement I said that he was welcome to bring the wine upstairs. He said he would be 5 minutes. After 35 I finished what I was doing and went home. Poor fella. He had splits in the crotch of his pants where they had worn through.

Oh – and Lady Gang alert – I’m double dog baby sitting with Mrs Kipling on Saturday night at the most luxurious flat in town. Anyone else want to come and watch the Nollywood channel and polish of a few bottles of something? The Booyah Cook may or may not make an appearance. Depends how much we want Pizza instead.

xx Lektrogirl

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