Before breaking my cake dome today, Dora and I shared some spiritual moments.
First she told me that Gyan will be a dead man if he ever returns to Ghana and he needs a body guard now. I asked her “What about Ghana and the football?” and she screeched “What is da meaning of this stupid man crying? Dis stupid man needs to learn to kick a ball.”
Then I was telling Dora some of my personal life problems cause I was away in Nantes and didn’t see her last week. Dora says:
Emma, you are like the little animal that makes the honey. You know, the little one, [a bee?], yes dat one. Emma you are like a bee. You are busy all the time making things, doing things, making things sweet for you and all your friends. Making honey making honey. Emma you are a bee. Sweet sweet sweet. But I told you, don’t trust your friends. Don’t even trust yourself. Your friends don’t want you to change because they like you as the Emma they know. You will find a man and he will hold you safe like and egg. I told you dat one before. But don’t tell ANYONE for a long long time about him because people who will be jealous. I don’t know who dat stupid one is you know – he is a witch for saying those stupid things. Just don’t trust anyone. Not even yourself. You will go out and open your mouth and think “God what did I say that for.” [At this point I didn't try and explain I have a blog, what it is, what kind of news is available on it etc. I think I would have been in a big trouble. Anyway the spiritual advice was progressing to a story about a table and a chair.] This stupid story is like the chair talking about the table. You sit in the chair and you hear it talking about “She is like this, she is like that, she is a thief, she is stupid, she is whatever.” And because you are sitting in the chair, why would bother to ask the table if it is true? Dat one is a proverb.
I got a bit lost but I think I understood.
Then we opened my Twi book and first class started – greetings.
Me: Akwaaba Afua.
Dora: Yaa nua.
Me: Wo ho te sEn?
Dora: Me ho yE.
I can’t write the language properly on the keyboard – the E should be more like a backwards 3.
I have however started to get better and the super nasal noise that you should do in “ho” – a bit like saying the start of the word “horn” really hard and fast.