Hello! Bonjour! Willkommen!

June 23, 2008

HEY MATHIEU

Dear Mathieu

I is past two in the morning and I can’t sleep. Mostly because I am thinking of a way to come to Paris – I need someone to tell all my secrets too. For the most part, my blog is wonderful but there are always other things I want to write about as well. That is why I like to talk with you. I know you are a bad father but Bunny will always climb on the knee of Europe’s greatest Parisian Jew and whisper in your ear. God… I feel like I’m going a bit stir crazy tonight. What do you suggest?

I spent the day in bed watching Almodovar DVD’s. Today it was Kika. There was a scene where a rapist who has escaped from prison breaks into the house of his sisters employers, fake ties up his sister and goes into the bedroom to find his sister’s boss sleeping. He sticks pieces of a clementine into the pussy of the woman to taste her on the fruit. For some reason it made me think of XXCENSOREDXX and want to be lying in XXCENSOREDXX parents bed under the nude portrait they have of themselves looking out the window at the sun on the wall.

I also got an apology from XXCENSOREDXX, but XXCENSOREDXX can keep his two fingered half hearted tap on the shoulder to himself while he pretends to be all goody goody. The sad thing is, there is nothing going on and I miss his big jokes like crazy. It is so stupid. He just has an insecure girl riding his nuts.

Then there is XXCENSOREDXX. XXCENSOREDXX is my secret. And XXCENSOREDXX is who I think of the most and would be the first thing I would tell you all about. And the second. And the third.

Do you remember when we ate Burger King? I just remembered walking down Holloway Road.

D’accord. Moi je suis fatigue – ENFIN. Je vais au pieu. I hope I don’t have to see that ugly boude boudin any time soon. Save a seat for me at that nice restaurant we went to last time. I will meet you there as soon as I can.

xx Emma

March 28, 2008

NOT SUITABLE WITH A HANGOVER

As I have said many times before – Ramiro sends me the best YouTube videos.

This one I found on my own. Listen to the obsessions of the people involved.

I am now going to go an puke in a bucket for about three hours. 2 Girls 1 Cup might be more explicit, but in terms of grossness, it has NOTHING on this cause this cannot be faked. It is like 2000 VICE magazine gross jars rolled into one video.

xx Lektrogirl

Can I just reiterate again I feel so sick.

February 26, 2008

RAMI

I don’t have enough pictures of Rami on my blog, that’s for sure!

xx Lektrogirl

February 15, 2008

RAMI ALWAYS HAS THE BEST HOOKUPS

xx Lektrogirl

January 14, 2008

MY SECOND OBSESSION

First bras and now my interest in Javier Bardem grows:


Penelope Cruz! How could he… TOM CRUISE’S SLOPPY SECONDS?

Here we have the real life Javier Badem and Penelope Cruz:

It is Ramiro and his babe girlf Sandra.

WARNING: OVER 18’s ONLY and NOT MY PARENTS

Also, adam_roll2000 has been favouriting my photos.

He is definitely not shy.

Let’s check some of Adam’s other favourites in my new online exhibition called “ADAM’S FAVOURITES”:

I really love Flickr and other people’s pictures that you can spy on.

xx Lektrogirl

January 13, 2008

MY MIND WANDERS

Well the work in the bathroom grouting has gone so slowly – so boring. But while I work I have had a lot of time to think about all kinds of stuff – like particularly who is the hottest actor at the moment IMHO.

It all started when the ads came on TV for that new movie “No Country for Old Men”. Though I don’t have much of a clue as to what the movie about, I kept seeing this guy

shooting people and acting really weird and dark thinking “Fuck he’s hot!” But somewhere in my mind I kept thinking – I’ve seen that guy somewhere before, but crying. WHO IS HE?

Google called and I soon learned the killer of my dreams is a Spanish actor called Javier Bardem. But there was still something not right. This guy definitely needs the psycho bowl cut for me to feel his vibe. The guy I remember thinking TOTAL BABE was definitely crying and definitely has short hair. THEN IT CLICKED!!

The guy I was really in love with was Denny Duquette! OMG! The man who was dying in his hospital bed that was having a relationship with the babe nurse Izzy in Grey’s Anatomy.

Here we see [real name] Jeffrey Dean Morgan looking amazing. Point to note – JDM will never be amazingly famous cause he has a bad name.

So I had to get on AIM and tell my friend Ramiro all about it – and even he was astounded as to how similar the two men are:

Spit roast anyone? That is enough to make me kick an own goal, YGM?

Back grouting, I thought about it further – a psycho killer and someone with a fatal illness. It is a documented fact I am also in love with Owen Wilson who we all know tried to top himself not that long ago over that What’s-Her-Name.

Amazing! Can you just imagine the photographer and the stylist at this shoot. It makes me cry lauging thinking about it. But even so – BABE. What is up with me though falling for all these weirdos?

I had a rethink over a Milo [it's Australian, Google it.] And of course – HOW COULD I FORGET NICK STOKES!! Only in the era without the moustach. YGM?! I love facial hair but not a little mo.

So here is Agent Nick Stokes from CSI Crime Scene Investigation [the Vegas one.] Tell me, who wouldn’t want one of Nick Stokes digits poking around in one of your orifices laid out on a slab? I for one can raise my hand high in the air and say ME PLEASE. Until I saw this…


George Eades au natural. He might as well be in the fucking L’Oreal Dandruff commercial saying “Hey babe wanna root?”

Even speaking with a dirty French accent can’t save him.

God… so who is left?

Vincent D’Onofrio?

It seems XXCENSOREDXX is luckier than I am right now. He tells me he has a new lady who is rich and wears Jimmy Choo’s. That could be any WAG. I wonder if he is having an illicit affair with Posh Spice or even Danielle Lloyd?

Last night we went to the Walthamstow Dogs to wish Jo Apps a bon voyage.


Ronojoy trying to tickle Carrie’s fancy.


Jo and her boyfriends.

xx Lektrogirl

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