Hello! Bonjour! Willkommen!

August 23, 2009

HOT MONEY

The man in the red East 17 woollie has fluid delivery of his lines.
And wait until you see the wife not knowing what they will do.

And the knitted stripy demon outfit!

xx Lektrogirl

September 14, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #17

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 September 2008 02:34
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: MY thanks for yr seemingly happier email.

The chapel is in the next room to this comp room, The Chaplain came and smiled at Max and I, then shook her head, wistfully. No hope for we two sinners, mate. Thiugh we are comforted by the thought that if Jesus loved sinners, we are due a bundle of love from the Hairy Ghost. O or off the cross.How’d you get the mozzie bites, Chalie? Not uncovering innappropriately in the park, I hope. Might be the same family of mozzies that bit my arse on V.E.Day at the end of WW1. I scored an A.T.S. SGT. She was on the Victory parade with us ‘Old Soldiers(I was 19 and had four years under my belt including service in Italy. She was my first English blow through. The first was an ancient old Hungarian shiela in the snow in a paddock ioutside Trieste, Northern Italy. Her father was an Italian Mussolini Nazi. H e would have stuck a bayonet up me jacksie if he had found me on top of his daughter. I’m still here, so the bastard didn’t see a mound of snow going up and down in the paddock. T.I.F.I He’s dead now, for sure. So is she, I reckon. She was old enough to be me mother 60 years ago. FARK.
The bloody KIWIS DID US OVER LAST NIGHT AR RUGBY UNION Rhe black bastards. Though to be fair we were in front for the second half but we just hsadn’t got the bottle to finish on top.
Thanks for he email, mate. You’ll never know how much it brightens an otherwise pissy day when YOU commumicate with me. Thanks a lot. Keep up the good fight mate. Tomorrow Might be a better day. We might win the LOTTO.aND THEN WE HAVE TO BE PREPARED That we won’t It’s only muckin foney Cheers E.J. Thanks again. Kuv ex yer ancient DadXXXXX.

August 18, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #15.5

Bugger – this one came on Thursday but I forgot to post it!! Sorry everyone.

—–

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 August 2008 03:20
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: first day down, This is in answer to your first day down’ a good learning day, and lots of quids to come?

I know rour’e busy etc. but you are the only one who has the brightest and appreciative of the ‘rare’ vulgaruty that sneaks into my writing. I don’t have control over it, it just overflows as from a carbuncle pussing out of an infected follicle. God help us!
Our boss stopped me yestertday looking all harrassed and worn out, I asked “what’s up Chook” To which she replied this place gives me the ‘effein shits’ (quote, unquote)
Evidently the Salvo’s are giving her a hard time, which is easy for them , because they think they’ve got God on their side, What a load of bollocks?
The two chaplains are very pleasant folk, they are from the south of Edinburgh.
‘Borderers’ to be precise. Still they are Scottish and are fairly understanding of my antipathy to religion when I relate my earl days in Glsgow being a protestant at a predominantly Catholic school. My brothers and I gave blood noses to Catholic abusers every day we gathered in the playground for recess. Even the shit faced girls used to call out ‘Protestant Bastards’
But that was a lot of yesterdays ago my little friend.I remember give ing one shiela a bit of a dunt up the arse to help her into the classroom for wittering shit at me.
Miss King sent me for the strap and book for violence on a female. She larraped six of the best on my hand. Which was fair enough. W hen I think of my father, thumping shielas isn’t really fair play.
Itried deleting all my previous emails theother day, yours and mine but the flamin printer took a hand in printing the saved in drafts tray.
Some of the reading from each other is a good laugh!
Specially bits about what hangs in and out of best? Don’t tell me youve relaxed you guard and let XXCENSOREDXX have a serve? Fark, (exactly)That’s enough of your expensive time. I hope it get’s more interesting for you mate? Luv ex PaXXXX.

——

I promise that I will not let emails sit in my inbox for too long without posting them.

Well work again this morning and I cant believe that I am awake and happy at this time of day. Totally unheard of! On the weekend I was awake pretty early – the transition hasn’t been that bad from slacker internet addict to SATC working girl. TCB. Anyway I better go and find something more appropriate to wear to work than pink polkadot PJ bottoms and a red Kon Tiki t-shirt [an old one of Max's he gave me!]

xx Lektrogirl

August 14, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #14

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 August 2008 03:20
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: first day down, This is in answer to your first day down’ a good learning day, and lots of quids to come?

I know rour’e busy etc. but you are the only one who has the brightest and appreciative of the ‘rare’ vulgaruty that sneaks into my writing. I don’t have control over it, it just overflows as from a carbuncle pussing out of an infected follicle. God help us!
Our boss stopped me yestertday looking all harrassed and worn out, I asked “what’s up Chook” To which she replied this place gives me the ‘effein shits’ (quote, unquote)
Evidently the Salvo’s are giving her a hard time, which is easy for them , because they think they’ve got God on their side, What a load of bollocks?
The two chaplains are very pleasant folk, they are from the south of Edinburgh.
‘Borderers’ to be precise. Still they are Scottish and are fairly understanding of my antipathy to religion when I relate my earl days in Glsgow being a protestant at a predominantly Catholic school. My brothers and I gave blood noses to Catholic abusers every day we gathered in the playground for recess. Even the shit faced girls used to call out ‘Protestant Bastards’
But that was a lot of yesterdays ago my little friend.I remember give ing one shiela a bit of a dunt up the arse to help her into the classroom for wittering shit at me.
Miss King sent me for the strap and book for violence on a female. She larraped six of the best on my hand. Which was fair enough. W hen I think of my father, thumping shielas isn’t really fair play.
Itried deleting all my previous emails theother day, yours and mine but the flamin printer took a hand in printing the saved in drafts tray.
Some of the reading from each other is a good laugh!
Specially bits about what hangs in and out of best? Don’t tell me youve relaxed you guard and let the big fella have a serve? Fark, (exactly)That’s enough of your expensive time. I hope it get’s more interesting for you mate? Luv ex PaXXXX.

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