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September 6, 2009

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #26

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@XXCENSOREDXX]
Sent: 06 September 2009 04:48
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: the cardinal and i at the spatisserie at the dorchester

‘ere’s me, walked passed the Dorchester 4 million times in my earlier days, never put me foot inside the door. Never had the dosh, and me father would have kicked me arse for having thoughts above my station.
No wonder that Cardinal is a mate. Except for being slightly thinner faced she looks very much as you do. Long hair, brown?, good looking complexion, etc.etc. won’t continue. YOU will only accuse me of being a ‘dirty old man’
Anyhow, the tucker(can you call food of that standard ‘tucker’?) It looks fabulous. Seems a good place to move out of the daily tribulations of earing a living. You ought to take Hobart with you? Don’t be mean. slip him in yer carry bag/large purse and let him have a wander. Sorry HER. W.K.O.F. name is Hobart for a female?F.C.S.
Got an Email ex Sars today and she tells me there’s a parcell in the post, which I’ll prolly get to-morrow. She doesn’t know I know it’s seeds so I can plant things to remind me of you lot. I have planted cuttings of Roses, Iceberg and Bridal shower for your reminder. BIG Sharpish tasting radishes for me. Can’t tell wot I’m putting in for the kids and Sars till I get the package tomorrow.. The prickles on the roses will be for Pussie!.
Look after yorself Kiddo. Winter’s on it’s way. Keep away from any fukka who has a runny nose or is sneezing. Swine Flu is a bastard. Bad for yer health.Cheers from yer old Dad. Since The Cardinal makes you happy, say hullo to her from me.

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@XXCENSOREDXX]
Sent: 06 September 2009 04:55
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: my cooking – macaroons

P.S. Your cooking you faggot? You nicked them from them from the Dorchester. You ought be doing Nigella Lawson’s job on T/Vif that’s really your cooking. Fark. They look delicious mate. Cheers again. Poppa.xxxx

August 10, 2009

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #25

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX]
Sent: 10 August 2009 02:14
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: FW: THE WEDDING INVITATION

Have you been very busy. Accounts usually are at this time of year profits and loss, and how much interesr is dead stock eating into the profits? Been there, done that kid. And those in the top echelon usually look down at the accountant as if it is her /his fault the sales div didn’t unload?But that was yesterday mate. Haven’t had a text lately so you have either been experimenting with cocktails or something similar or just plain tired from business?
Yer ma came to lunch on Saturday/ Chicken and veg hot pot, which she seemed to enjoy. The other blokes at the table seem to enjoy her wittering. and she usually bring me a walnut sticky-bun. Which I swear is good for my mental health.
Been off crook for a week, Effin Flu and congestion. Sometimes you go to sleep and hope for the inevitable sooner rather than later?
How’s His Majesty , THE CAT? Bowels workin well? Actually the smell of the urine of a Tom is the most pervasive stench in a house. Try to catch him in the spot he empties has bladder. or BUY A LARGEST BIRDCAGE YOU CAN FIT ON YOUR WINDOWSILL AND SHOVE THE SCRAWNY LITTLE FUCKER IN THERE WHEN YOU HAVE TO GO OUT(WITH A BIT OF TUCKER AND H2O) of course. I would like ti print my usual expletive about CapsLqck. But I won’t.
Look after yourself matey. I get worried when I don’t hear from you for a few days. Episodes like the Kings Cross affair, make my bowels rumble Cheers mate. Lolve from yer errant father!XXXX

August 3, 2009

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #24

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX]
Sent: 03 August 2009 07:58
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: your photos.

god luv us, you are a tall girl. And may I add pretty good looking. AND anyone would know who yer good lookin’ pa is!!!!!! I’l try to print them off for my “Art gallery” Thass my eldest daughter. She’s me mate. Put that in Diddong’s bum and smoke it. Just come in from m y postrage stamp sized garden. Put a little wooden shelf up outside my window for the birds, water and a bit of tucker. Just like any silly old man does. usually when there are no humans with enough wit around the place , birds make more sense. Being a bloke and your father I’ve never looked at your legs as things of beauty. However you’ve a got a fine pair of legs duckie. And I’ve got a photo to prove it, Wait til I show them to the Bishop. Cheers yer pa,XXXX
Your mum gave me a bit of a warning the other day. “I’m not paying money to have you buried” Oh ses I. coon’t give a stuff I’ll be dead. So she is taking another bit off the one eighth of a pension I am allowed and saving it in a debit account. Got 2000.00 bucks so far. She will need about 6 thou. I told her to get a cardboard coffin and paint it white. No bastard would know it ain’t cedar. only the poor bastards carrying it. Got to come one day. kiddo. I’ll be able to find out what it’s all about
Cheers mate. Keep on keepin on having a bit of fun out of life while you’re young. I did so I cunt grumble now. eh?
Cheers. kick dingdong up the bum for me. I luv thr scrawney little turkey gobbler. LUVyer DadXXXXXX

> From: ME
> To: MY FAMILY
> Subject: RE: Emailing: P8010086
> Date: Sun, 2 Aug 2009 09:13:33 +0100
>
> These are from when we had dinner all the girls the other night and then we
> went back to sarah lee’s house and played with her dog.
>

FYI: Gross about the legs thing from your own father!

xx Lektrogirl

May 26, 2009

GRIS GRIS ANS

Just a sketch and something to do this evening.

To quote The G.A.: “Maaate, Never give in!”

xx Lektrogirl

April 7, 2009

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB LONG OVERDUE

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 31 March 2009 00:31
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: Me at sarah lee’s house

still haven’t seen your sarahlee’s house photos. your mother has got a new comp, maybe she hasn’t transfered them. F.K.

yOUR SISTER EMAIED ME THE OTHER DAY that tho the dy was sunny in D’port, you could feel that winter fingers were touching one’s bones with icy undercurrents. Today I know what she meant. Was bloody cold out in the garden patch thisa.m.. Except today is accreditation day for the home, they check the answer to the question, ‘is the government money being spent wisely?. If it weren’t for prying bodies snooping around I’d be in bed. MAYBE THIS ARVO? on IT. nEEDless to add, companionless!
What’s with you and your ever-changing admirers? French. German? Celonese? LOOK AT THESE? Life is so boring I think the altenative can’t be any the worse. I guess I’ ll see soon enough/ Cheers. yer pa.xxx

# # # # # # # # # #

From: John Davidson
Subject: RE: Me at sarah lee’s house
Sent: 02 Apr ‘09 00:59

got the pics ofyou at the tucker at Sara Lees house. Gawd help us I’d eat tht beatifull looking food offa baby’s nappie. I haven’t had a real belly-full of ‘ real ‘for farkin yonks. O nly SAlly Ann shit which is crossed turds on a plate with freckles on them, the farkin smell is crook, I tell yer.
Get talkin’ to the wall paper and msake yer poor ol’ Dad a happier man!Luv yah. Pops.XXXX

# # # # # # # # # #

> ——-Original Message——-
> From: John Davidson
> Subject: RE: Me at sarah lee’s house
> Sent: 19 Mar ‘09 00:45
>
> Ain’t caught up with ma this week. Saturday prolly. When she brings the
> paper(W.E,Australian when we attempt the crossy. We must be getting older,
> for we cannot do as much of as once we did. Sorry y’r tired. It’s a bit of
> a bastard when y’r young you have to spend such a lot of energy just to
> keep up! Ave another effi beer. Guiness for St Pat’s day. What beats me St
> Pat was a Welshman who went to Ireland (Omagh) to spread the word. Yet an
> irishman would bang you in the lughole if you reminded them of that FACT
> Your great grandparents were Irish, from Dublin. Which might account for
> yer screwball father’s antics? See yer. my dear girl. How about that git
> who gave his Daughter, 7 children. Fark. He was Austrian. So was Hitler,
> and he definitely WAS a nutter. Heil Hitler Luv from yer pops.

# # # # # # # # # #

> ——-Original Message——-
> From: John Davidson
> Subject: RE: Last night’s supper part one
> Sent: 15 Mar ‘09 23:54
>
> per the re: three parts. thereis nowt on the input on this comp. Sorry
> to say

April 4, 2009

A FAN OF THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #22

I haven’t post may new posts for the John Davidson Fan Club for a while but I have a few emails racking up. I was going to do it this evening actually before ‘Family Dinner’ – rabbit casserole, kale, cabbage and home made bagels. Instead, I am checking my email and this comment appears about a previous post of The John Davidson Fan Club if you want to refresh your memory about, you can read it here.

Paul G has left a new comment on your post “THE G.A. RECOMMENDS A RESTAURANT”:

Emma

I know I’m a year late but Schmidt’s popped up today because I am meeting someone for a drink at the Charlotte Street Hotel.

Schmidt’s was the first restaurant Iw as taken to as a kid. I remember it well because itw as so huge and two waiters – one Greek and the other Dutch – had a loud fight in the kitchen over a football match the previous night and my mother’s freshly prepared food was flung during the altercation.
Cut to a few years later and my first job at a phot library around the corner.
Freddie Schmidt funded it; he was the son of the owner and incredibly Austrian/English. Schmidts had just closed down and Freddie was looking fore anotegr business opportunity.
I remember it lay empty for a couple of years at least – this was 70s London which still had bomb damage from WW2 – and seemed like a relic from the Vienna Secession, not the punk rock West End.

There you go.

From an old timer.

PX

Wow. A whole lot better than hate mail from Prancehall.

xx Lektrogirl

January 12, 2009

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #21

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 10 January 2009 00:25
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: g’day, and g’day to you an’all. 1/4 to 11a.m. here, guess y’r in the scratch escaping from the cold and farkin snow?

That was a long and interesring e’mail, shagger. I like to read about your pursuits that haunt you dailySpecially about your mates who fall out about’usually’ fuck all. Talking about cold, you’ld get a shock if you were home here, the Summer, HAS PASSED tASMANIA BY. The best we have had so far is 16 degrees C’ Cold winds and rain, snow on the mountain, etc,etc.
Program on S.B.S. last night Secrets of the orgasm. So they built a see-thru plastic insert spectrum so you could look deep into her vagina. Supposedly looking for the ‘G’ spot. whatever the fark that is? Any way it did nothing for an aged 83 yr old, who’ld rather have a bowl of hot soup anyway.
Ain’t that typical of public utilities, like they couldn’t or wouldn’t tell you over the blower how to change the farkin batteries. Oh no. you got to have a night school ticket and an electrician’s certificate to change a battery. mate
Shower of faecal nobbies.
Sara and the family seemed to have had a fulsome festive season. G.F.luck to them. At least they didn’t have to engage in solitary thoughts and on your own-ness. Though I think I might be glad if I tell myself the truth, because IO do find XXCENSOREDXX a bit hard to take. Thick as bricks. XXCENSOREDXX read a booki in(fiction that is)in his life gets on my tits. Specially if he beats me at chess. Young sAM AT6 YEARS PLAYS BETTER CHESS THAN i DID WHEN i WAS 10.Fuck the caps lock! He’ could be a little champion the way he’s going. learning to play.I f you hear a violent squeal over the oceans. you’ll know the little fart has beaten his Grandpa? Makes you wonder, what is the worth of 70 odd years of experience when some bright spark comes up and digs a hole of defeat for you?
How’s the Deutch going? Or has Le Langue Francois takenover? Hoe about a bit of low class Russian? “Yopt via match, ti chouyou garbati! You stuff yer mother yer hump backed prick!
SEE YA LATER MATE. i’LL SEND A SHORT TEXT TO TELL YOUTHE EMAIL IS IN YOUR COMP. i WAS GOING TO SAY BOX, BUT IT SEEMED IAPPROPRIATE!” those bloody caps lock agen. Sorry. I think the comp does it to annoy. Like the Red Duchess in Alice . The baby she was chucking pepper on ‘only cried to annoy!
All the best kiddo. Don’t know what we’ld talk about if you were here. Couldn’t be worse than what I write on the comp?
Luv ex yer pa. XXXXX

January 1, 2009

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB NEW YEAR

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 01 January 2009 00:11
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: The festive season is over thanks to the fireworks.

I don’t think your email of the 8th December really sunk into my addled consciousness when I read it the first time.Now having read it again your comments regarding XXCENSOREDXX are certainly no less than true. Although I don’t think penises should be so maligned by associating them with that crunt. I remember being in similar circs with a XXCENSOREDXX of Sydney who saved me from deportation when the Harbour Police caught up with me, Not, love, just a bit of rumpy pumpy and somewhere to sleep til I got a flat and a job etc. When she came across a millionaire fisherman from Darwin who wanted to marry her, she offered me 200 pounds if I would let her divorce me? This meant he didn’t have to know she was already married . Yack. Yack. Yack. I gladly accepted the 200 quid and moved on. But that XXCENSOREDXX heap of busted bumholes deserves a good kick up the anus, and if your sure you wouldn’t rise to his advances IO would him a severe dose of S.T.D. I hope you are able to send an email. When I don’t get a comment about an email I sent to you, I wonder if you are having difficulties with the system Windows offers ,here?
Hope your year does progress a little more happily my little mate. I always find I can make the thick shit which is my brain think more happily and positively When I think/tell it to. I am told quite frequently that I am paranoid, but I just tell them to G.F.
Luv yer poor ol’ Dad. He’s pretty rooted. Or Pretty and rooted!

December 8, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #20

Time for a little Christmas decoration on this blog I think as The G.A. has now sent out his Christmas message to all and sundry via email:

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX]
Sent: 08 December 2008 04:27
To: Bob davidson; Dorothy Trace; Emma Davidson; paul davis; rose at work; rosemary davidson; Sally Foster; sally foster.; Sara; sheelagh; trent buckley
Subject: re: The festive seaonal greetings which most folk expect about now

Not another one? The fiest ten were quite exciting, but the last seventy three are becoming ‘more of the same’, if you know what I mean?
Let’s face humanity is not sure of the birthdat, and many don’t believe a virgin can have a baby and remain a virgin, AND The three proponents of the ’said’ Son of God, Peter, Paul and Him were dealt with cruelly by the Caeser who maintained HE was the son of God. Paul had his noggin cut off, Peter was crucified and the buried on the cross upside down, and the other fella was crucified for the love of we sinners, which stretches the imagination because he upset the moneylenders and banks, the Jews and all other religious attenders who liked their own Gods and rituals.
However. be that as it may, if the current activities ‘unscrooge’ and therebye make you and the recipients of your kindnesses happy, may I,as a devout unbeliever hope for your personal Festive Happiness.
Cheers to you all ex-your aging friend, husband, father,uncle. Great uncle, Grandfather and companion to the aged , John.

——————————————————————————–
Sell your car for just $40 at CarPoint.com.au It’s simple!

October 13, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #19

Two mails in my inbox this morning – from different people of course.

——————————————————————————–
From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 13 October 2008 02:10
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: yer feet hurt?

Thanx 4 the email. Doesn’t Telstra shorthand give u the shites? Thnx my arse! I just love the telstra system. A man writes something peurile, infamously rude, belittlibg to say the least and the farkin mobile says, “message could not be sent!” that really pisses me orf. How come your feet hurt sitting down all day? Like me I imagine the bones of yer arse would be the aching points? It certainly is with ,e. I think they make wheelchair bases especially hard to remind the ‘wheelchair inhabitants’ that they are not thei for comfort but transport. Th e bastards.
Just printed a note from Htmail about changing my ‘password’ to prevent ’scams. I might change mine to ‘mother’s milk’ which shoukd be good 4 a sucker like me. The only thing is, will I remember which boob i’m sucking on? As a good friend of mine is wont to interject-Haha ha ha. But Ithink she uses capital letters? My Haha looks different.
Just organising a bit of spring planting, salad shite mostly, garlic, spinach, rocket lettuce etc, I’d like to propogate a few persimmon trees. Beautiful fruit. Trees are worth 40 bucks each, There are 2 in my bit of garden, but I think propogation is besat in Autumn?
See you later shags, all the best ex yer DadXXXX,

And:
——————————————————————————–
well, i tried, you know.

he was, like i said, not very good in bed, but fun. we were at my place with two other of his friends. and yeah well, it was fun. Thick…. thick !!! i’m telling you !!

Each mail is as good as each other.

xx Lektrogirl

October 3, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #18

I managed to get a quick email out to my Dad last night after whining I was too tired…

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 03 October 2008 04:04
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: yo re yo farkin yo yo. p-yours

Fire alarm going off. Lunch just started. I ain’t eating smelly half cooked fish anyway. I hope the kitchen catches fire! aND THE FARKIN COOK He wears a tall white hat and calls himself CHEF! His name is Roger Rider, I think he’s as camp as a farkin badger. He thinks he has the rights to my salad produce from my bit of garden, lettuce, herbs, garlic etc. I hope he’s first to lift a lemon from me lemon tree, I manure it liberally with MY urine. The farkin b!

Stockholm? Why’d ya don’t take yer poor old dad, imprisoned here in a farkin aged care internment camp. Jesus OLD people are a severe pain in the anus. and some of them smell pretty crook too. I expect I don’t have a lot of room to talk? Though 83 ain’t too bad, but lots of other farkers seem to fall off the perch at 83. Wonder why? Maybe they didn’t live the good clean, Christian life yer pa did?
Actually your email was a good booster to me. It was like your old self, uppy and busy and much happier.
I’m glad the long shite has dropped off the peg. Life’s too short to have a grizzling, sarcastic prat hanging about. MEN ARE LIKE TAXI-CABS, MATE(FARK) they’re two a penny, just whistle and they’ll come a-running.
Good on yer, kid. Sounds like you have got back into a ‘jack-pot’ era? ££CENSORED££ quid a year should cover the cost of your night-club pissing on with Philippa?
Might even covwer the rent?
I know you’ld rather be looking at wall-paper when you’re not at work so I guess I’d better ‘coff, Real good to hear from you. LAV- NO Luv from yer ol’ manXXXX.

September 14, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #17

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 September 2008 02:34
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: MY thanks for yr seemingly happier email.

The chapel is in the next room to this comp room, The Chaplain came and smiled at Max and I, then shook her head, wistfully. No hope for we two sinners, mate. Thiugh we are comforted by the thought that if Jesus loved sinners, we are due a bundle of love from the Hairy Ghost. O or off the cross.How’d you get the mozzie bites, Chalie? Not uncovering innappropriately in the park, I hope. Might be the same family of mozzies that bit my arse on V.E.Day at the end of WW1. I scored an A.T.S. SGT. She was on the Victory parade with us ‘Old Soldiers(I was 19 and had four years under my belt including service in Italy. She was my first English blow through. The first was an ancient old Hungarian shiela in the snow in a paddock ioutside Trieste, Northern Italy. Her father was an Italian Mussolini Nazi. H e would have stuck a bayonet up me jacksie if he had found me on top of his daughter. I’m still here, so the bastard didn’t see a mound of snow going up and down in the paddock. T.I.F.I He’s dead now, for sure. So is she, I reckon. She was old enough to be me mother 60 years ago. FARK.
The bloody KIWIS DID US OVER LAST NIGHT AR RUGBY UNION Rhe black bastards. Though to be fair we were in front for the second half but we just hsadn’t got the bottle to finish on top.
Thanks for he email, mate. You’ll never know how much it brightens an otherwise pissy day when YOU commumicate with me. Thanks a lot. Keep up the good fight mate. Tomorrow Might be a better day. We might win the LOTTO.aND THEN WE HAVE TO BE PREPARED That we won’t It’s only muckin foney Cheers E.J. Thanks again. Kuv ex yer ancient DadXXXXX.

August 25, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #16 or so

It’s a dog’s life…

——————————————————————————–
From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 24 August 2008 04:57
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: Your unhappy news.

What a nuisance, for want of a better word. What stupid events has she perptrated to get herself in the dido? Nothing you can do to turn her around? XXCENSOREDXX If you were here in Tas then I could sign over my half of the house, then you could use it as security on a bank loan to create a busines here? Fark knows. Then again you aren’t in a very receptive frame of mind after such bad news.
Keep pecking kid. it ain’t the last job in the world.
Makes me think of Melbourne many years ago. Down to me last 8 bob. Bought a paper and applied to be Salesman for Dalgety’s. Luck would have the Manager, Arthur Pattinson, ask me if I followed the footy. I answered , yes. Carlton. Arthur glowed and sai,”Good I’m a Drector for Carlton. Stood me in good stead for the next 12 years. as you know, or may remember?
Think lucky girl. There’s always a bit of luck around the corner. Like you always say,”what goes around comes around.” Mine is” Think lucky. You’ll be lucky!” Though the golden eagle doesn’t shit too often 0ut of the Lotteries. Strike me lucky. I only want a million to get us started’
See yer kiddo. Chun up and tell t.t.f.themselves.paXXXX

——————————————————————————–

If anyone else was having a bummed out moment, please feel free to take some of my Dad’s advice for yourselves. There is plenty of The G.A.’s vibes to go around.

xx Lektrogirl

August 18, 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #15.5

Bugger – this one came on Thursday but I forgot to post it!! Sorry everyone.

—–

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 August 2008 03:20
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: first day down, This is in answer to your first day down’ a good learning day, and lots of quids to come?

I know rour’e busy etc. but you are the only one who has the brightest and appreciative of the ‘rare’ vulgaruty that sneaks into my writing. I don’t have control over it, it just overflows as from a carbuncle pussing out of an infected follicle. God help us!
Our boss stopped me yestertday looking all harrassed and worn out, I asked “what’s up Chook” To which she replied this place gives me the ‘effein shits’ (quote, unquote)
Evidently the Salvo’s are giving her a hard time, which is easy for them , because they think they’ve got God on their side, What a load of bollocks?
The two chaplains are very pleasant folk, they are from the south of Edinburgh.
‘Borderers’ to be precise. Still they are Scottish and are fairly understanding of my antipathy to religion when I relate my earl days in Glsgow being a protestant at a predominantly Catholic school. My brothers and I gave blood noses to Catholic abusers every day we gathered in the playground for recess. Even the shit faced girls used to call out ‘Protestant Bastards’
But that was a lot of yesterdays ago my little friend.I remember give ing one shiela a bit of a dunt up the arse to help her into the classroom for wittering shit at me.
Miss King sent me for the strap and book for violence on a female. She larraped six of the best on my hand. Which was fair enough. W hen I think of my father, thumping shielas isn’t really fair play.
Itried deleting all my previous emails theother day, yours and mine but the flamin printer took a hand in printing the saved in drafts tray.
Some of the reading from each other is a good laugh!
Specially bits about what hangs in and out of best? Don’t tell me youve relaxed you guard and let XXCENSOREDXX have a serve? Fark, (exactly)That’s enough of your expensive time. I hope it get’s more interesting for you mate? Luv ex PaXXXX.

——

I promise that I will not let emails sit in my inbox for too long without posting them.

Well work again this morning and I cant believe that I am awake and happy at this time of day. Totally unheard of! On the weekend I was awake pretty early – the transition hasn’t been that bad from slacker internet addict to SATC working girl. TCB. Anyway I better go and find something more appropriate to wear to work than pink polkadot PJ bottoms and a red Kon Tiki t-shirt [an old one of Max's he gave me!]

xx Lektrogirl

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FANCLUB #15

Dear All

Before posting my Father’s opinions here from his latest email, I just want to re-iterate that they are MY FATHER’S opinions and not mine although I cannot speak for my sub-editor. Indeed – they may not even be my father’s opinions either, he maybe just be saying them for comedy effect…

—–

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 18 August 2008 01:34
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: MY ADDRESS IS the HOUSE WITH A BIG RED LIGHT SHINING OUT OF THE PORCH

tHANKS FOR THE WORDS/INFO. i MUST BE A GREAT RELIEF TO YOU TO KNOW YOU HAVE THE RENT AND TUCKER COSTS COVERED. Fark. You know why the expletive? I think my 83 rd year will be the last of controlled intelligence?
One other thing that springs to mind, you must gain great confidence in yourself that you are still elligble, and able to apply for, a,d get, a good job. I’ m happy for you any how.
All I can say about the Olympic games is spectacularly boring. The Chinese are so far up themselves I’m sure they can taste their own faeces on the back of their toungue. Nothing unsual, really thet use their own shite to manure thier own home grown salad and veges. They sprinlkle glitters on the turds to make them more attractive! To smell or eat? I’ m not sure. Cheers mate. 2 quick questions,
1.Where is your email computer?
2 When’s the best time for you to recive.
3What is your mobile phone number? I’d HATE TO BE SENDING VITAL INFO TO THE THIEVING GIT WHO NICKED YOUR PHINE. fARK AGEN. Cheers mate. Luv yer. Take care. Put a mouse trap by the edge of the bed, be suprised what the XXCENSOREDXX man ‘ll get caught in it? At XXCENSOREDXX he’ll prolly need a rat trap? Dadxxxx The comp just told me when I went to sign off that my message had not been sent. and that was after it had already told me it had sent it. so Ill send it again in case the F.R.E.D!

—–

xx Lektrogirl

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