DAY OFF

And what a day. Still broke and waiting for pay day I went back into town cause the guy at the Leicester Square Timpsons failed to cut a key correctly and I needed him to do it again. The key he cut as a replacement also didn't work. I hate him. He looks like a large version of the boot makers elves crossed with something out of A League of Gentlemen or something with brown gack all over his glasses. I also visited the Photographer's Gallery which wasn't a lot, then went and had a piece of rhubarb tart at PAUL and a really horrid coffee. After that I went into an antique etching and print place and asked the nerdy guy "I'm looking for pictures of naked ladies or tea parties." I mean what else would I want? A 'Negro' boxer, a prize winning horse or a battle scene - hardly. Anyway the poor guy blushed his face off and couldn't even bring himself to to say 'naked ladies' to his female boss [I bet he is big into vintage porn]. She sent me off to Cecil Court where I found some amazing plant lithographs and maps of Tasmania from the olden days. I didn't buy anything though. I will definitely go back though. I couldn't help but think of the rude man in Paris who has the shop selling old photographs in is it the Marché des Enfants or something? I so feel a trip to Paris coming soon.

Anyway - got home, had a nap but got woken by Superduck asking me about the name of a Café in Paris - which apparently has great hot chocolate. I don't even drink hot chocolate. Then OMG who should appear online by my old friend Noodles who I was able to swap some timely gossip with about one of the more highly strung ex's of my days and a lot of snorting ROLFing done on my part. Noodles also gave me the missing link to a mystery I have been trying to investigate for the last couple of weeks. So I was straight back on the phone to Superduck who could make like Craig David and Fill Me In. Superduck could assure me that XXCENSOREDXX is a piece of work and XXCENSOREDXX only goes for trophy men. HAHA. Good luck to XXCENSOREDXX then. To wind up the conversation, Superduck then went to tell me he wanted to jizz on Maude's face cause she is so cute, sweet, innocent and lovely [it is his cat] and take picture of it. Cool. Thankfully though he sent a text later telling me that even though he was trying hard and was thinking of XXCENSOREDXX Maude's little furry face really put him off and he couldn't do it.

And to put the lid on the day, Mr Chips has been making me a couple of videos on Facebook after we told each other to 'Get Fucked' the other day. In one of them he sang a little song along with what he calls his 'Paedo iPhone Piano' where he said I was like a cat stuck in a petrol can. Which I thought was a very accurate description of me sometimes - I can be that prickly.

All in all I have really enjoyed my day off. I hope to goodness that Oscar is in the office tomorrow. He is the cutest dog in the world.



I have worked in some offices where there have been dogs that have been nothing but trouble - pissing and shitting on the floor, constantly barking, biting people, chewing up staff's belongings - really badly trained dogs. Oscar on the other hand is just perfect! He has such a lovely nature and he is so friendly I love it when he sits at my desk and does my work for me. And I am going to see him tomorrow.

Oh cool - I just got another video from Mr Chips. He told me he is going to shoot me in the face and stab me in the cunt! Mr Chips really puts boys like Prancehall back in the playground when it comes to beef.

xx Lektrogirl

STRANGE IDEA OF LOVE

So I made a new video - this time of Pippa's band All About Eve Babitz. One night they performed at Paul Gorman's Lost Society party and Superduck and I filmed it. And another night I chased Pippa around Soho and then left it a few months. Finally yesterday I edited it all together.

This is my favourite All About Eve Babitz song. And I am really pleased with the video. I was on the phone to Superduck last night while he was stuffing envelopes at his high flying desk job and he told me that to edit the video's we shot together would be easy. I didn't tell him that I was actually trying to sync the live performance to an MP3 studio track and that the songs were at different tempos. FYI Nick Abrahams. Then he went on to tell me about bee keeping in Iceland.

xx Lektrogirl

YESTERDAY

With recent events in my life, it has taken me a while to get this thing online. I challenge everyone to nominate a better Facebook Grafitti Artist than Nicholas Abrahams. Here he has depicted a more realistic scene than that depicted on my birthday cake. Even though my mother's work came from actual photographs of R Kelly and I, somehow Abrahams seems to have captured something MORE. WHAT A GENIUS. I would prefer to think we were sucking car exhaust fumes though from a tailpipe than a bong. Cause I don't do drugs. Maybe something from a V8 engine machine - maybe like a Ford Cobra



or even this


check the number plate!

Just for your information - cars like this are all over still in Australia.

Yesterday was really a nice chilled out day - except for the part where I got really rained on. I went and met XXCENSOREDXX for coffee at Flat White. Oh the coffee was AMAZING. XXCENSOREDXX was quite jealous I new a number of the staff by name. Then off to snoop through Liberty and see what Spring Summer 2008 collections were in store.

Well!! Forget See by Chloe for this season unless you want to look like a 5 year. There were also a number of dresses that looked sneakily too much like other designers collections - one dress in fact was a total Marni knock off. Besides, you know that the whole collection will be ripped off in H&M and Top Shop by next week.

Marni knock off. I remember seeing the Marni one in a magazine which was grey with the grey painterly brush print thinking "Oh that would look great on a fat girl like me." I actually really liked the Marni one. Maybe I will make my own dress with a cut off t-shirt and some vintage fabric.

Pussy Pelmet. I can tell you know that this is going to be a big look for AW08 - so you better get some big knickers or your filet mignon's are going to be available to all and sundry. After Liberty I went to see Pippa at Maison B - I wish I had photographed the page out of the A.P.C. catalogue for SS08 cause there is a practically identical dress to this on a far more sour faced girl, except the dress was even shorter. The print was the same colour as well.

Having said that, there was a lot of REALLY NICE A.P.C. stuff in that look book and I'm waiting for my bag that I ordered when I was over in Paris with Max and Pippa in the A.P.C. studio. BRING IT ON!

So after half of an eclair with Pippa, I went up stairs to see the Noel Fielding painting exhibition. I really didnt like about 98% of it. What I do like is that Tania from Maison Bertaux has started curating these exhibitions in the the upstairs tea rooms. I think it is a really wonderful thing.

Anyway - sorry I'm rambling.

xx Lektrogirl

LOST SOCIETY

I just got back from Paul Gorman's night, The Look down in South London. Pippa's band All About Eve Babitz played again and Superduck and I got the chance to video tape two songs on two cameras at once and hopefully I will be able to edit it together to make a little video for them.


Here is a picture of the only cunt I want to know about right now. [See pussy smelling face story below for reference.] Anyway I was quite thrilled in a pathetic way to be shooting video with Nick cause he has made a documentary about Depeche Mode, proper pop videos as well as being close personal friends with Jeremy Deller. Which if you ever read the Shop At Maison B blog you would know I have already made a prick of myself in front of him.
Important to note - here is Nick freestyling his first "showerface" on his own. A LOT. Please send me your review on my first pupil's "showerface" performance. I was actually trying to explain this to DJ Assault at the time but Nick really got a firm grasp of the "showerface" concept.


When I was in Milan I was so miserable. Here is my eye. I went and catalogued all the people in the SLOWHITE section who were on the stands there this way. I looked the tiredest. But I think it was all the secret crying I was doing.


Katharine on the other hand was coping with Milan this way.


I'm thinking of starting a new business in my lunch break. For one pound people can visit the Katharine Hamnett archive for one hour and be truly amazed at all the crazy shit we have out in the back room. I swear to got - Cassette Playa and Silverlink would LOVE it! I always think of Carrie when I see the paisley jeans for some reason. They are pretty fly jeans.


Anyway here I am a bit tired and sad. But tomorrow is another day, which just happens to be FRIDAY!! Woo-Hoo!! One more day til Saturday and that means I can go and meet Cory and get a guided tour of his new exhibition opening at Max Wigram Gallery on New Bond Street. This show is going to be really awesome. I relaly looking forward to seeing Cory again and what new direction he is moving in.

Okay - I'm too tired now.

xx Lektrogirl

OMG!! I forgot to say XXCENSOREDXX has been telling me how horney he has been lately and how he can't stop having sex and he was thinking that by 40 this would have stopped but it totally hasn't. Which was a bit weird cause like I don't know XXCENSOREDXX THAT well. So I told him all about the time I discovered that XXCENSOREDXX had been sending emails to men off gay sex sites [advertising himself as 9" un-cut who likes nipple work and leather] and reading all the replies from different guys - some even including pictures of themselves with giant dildos up their bums [do men's call them dildos too or is there a gay word?] or sitting astrid a horse in the nude except for leather chaps and a waistcoat.