Sunday, 28 September 2008

CROSS EYE


cross eye, originally uploaded by Least Wanted.

o hai, iznt that ur new girlfriend?

Saturday, 27 September 2008

LET'S BE THERE FOR EACH OTHER

Hi XXCESNOREDXX
A pleasure to look at your lovely picture and your nice profile.I must say australian princess, u sound so easy going and u write crisp and short.I am quite new to the site,infact it was yesterday,that i subscribed and got a full membership,so this is definately not the best mail you have recieved so far...........BUT,its from a very genuine man.I am a medical doctor by profession,and work in east london with the NHS.A horse rider and swimmer(not at the same time) on most sundays,although i do enjoy walks in the parks,exhibitions,cinemas,bars & restuarants,and all the normal things,like chocolates and cats.(and do not wear pointy shoes)..lol.Am very romantic at heart,so not shy to show the feelings(holding hands/hugs/kisses).Witty with lots of jokes for every moment,but an intelligent conversation equally stimulates my brain cells. Am kind,down to earth and very genuine.Please write back,and be in touch if u fancy.Kind regards,K******d

For a Doctor, he's has bad spelling. But then I guess that is what you get when you post a profile on dating website. This guy is not hot which is a shame or I would def email him back so we could not be shy to show each other our feeling (holding hands/hugs/kisses). I have been talking to a guy in a gorilla suit though which is going much better.

xx Lektrogirl

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EXPLOSION IN WOOLWORTHS

The Message is Love: Silverlink feat. Jammer and Badness



You get to see the bee costume at last.

xx Lektrogirl

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Friday, 26 September 2008

Хорватия июнь

I love it when I find a new photostream to subscribe to.

Today I calculated I was happy to wake up to banana muffins. I deliberately didn't take my sunglasses or my camera to work so that I could take my £1 junk shop book "Faces, Figures And Feelings: A cosmetic Plastic Surgeon Speaks" by Leslie E. Gardener published in 1959. Dr Gardener has very bushy eyebrows a bit like Sam The Eagle from the Muppets. The book is illustrated with all kinds of before and after pictures which I will no doubt at to my Flickr or blog at some stage while referencing another bleeding heart story from my tragic life. Anyway - as it transpired The Cardinal came into town and met me for lunch. AND SHE IS NO LONGER A VIRGIN!!! After our bacon and avocado salads we went down to Ladurée in The Burlington Arcade. Her favourite is pistachio. A discerning palette. The statement of the afternoon had to be when she said "I didn't even know all this was here in the Burlington Arcade. Last week if I won the lottery I'd have gone off shopping somewhere else. This Saturday if I win the lottery, I'll be coming here first. Look at all the bling." Sadly, the harlequin pendant for £9500 I had my eye was was gone. I could settle for an antique Rolex. And we sat in the sun [very shiny today!] and she took some pictures and we discussed a friends wedding that we heard of where the venue alone will cost £20,000. A lot. But yerrr I could have used my sunnies and my snapper today.

Speaking of a lot, this is my most viewed picture in my photostream:



Watching the pair of them dance was such a funny night.

xx Lektrogirl

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MY GOAL

Shit check this out - Bruce Weber even has a dressed up dude to act as back support with his leg so he can photograph while sitting on the ground. MEGA. I know where I wanna be in my life when I am Weber's age.

NOT ONLINE A LOT



As I keep saying I haven't been online a lot lately. I have been feeling so shit you really cannot believe. It is my old friend "Lost At Sea Feeling" back again. If you have these times too, then you will understand. Hopefully you do, cause that will mean you are normal. But yeah, I have even thought about killing this blog. I started off not giving a fuck about what I wrote on here and telling great gossips and having a laugh. But has timed has moved on, I have found myself biting my tongue more often and thinking "Fuck should I say that?" and deleting half a paragraph. And that isn't why I started this blog in the first place. It was never meant to be a music blog, or a look at my H&M outfit blog, or anything, it was just supposed to be my place to sit down and chat away. Rather than have 4 AIM windows open and FB all running at the same time. What I find disturbing is why do I suddenly give a fuck even?



My relationship with my longest love is going through a rocky time. The relationship feels pretty empty and soulless at the moment? Maybe it is the weather? Maybe it wasn't meant to go on forever? Like the old man at Ed's bar in Chicago [when he was propositioning me to go back to his house and strip so he could look and not touch] said to Paul and I "You too are good for now. Not forever. Just for now." I am even looking at jobs back in Australia because I am tired of life with my longest love. City of London - I don't love you like I used to. But then - maybe it is the people I know and don't want to know any more that are making me feel less inclined to venture out doors and walk your streets in my big black boots.



God - fuck it - I feel like I am living someone else's life if I can't talk about my own here.

It is so weakening getting finger fucked by a guy who "doesn't want a girlfriend" and the only dicking I got is when they dicked me round. XXCENSOREDXX. What a waste of fucking time. It was in essence, my first lesbian relationship. LOLZ.

In other news: another friend told me once that they never wanted to work with someone on particular types of projects and that she wanted it to be 'our thing' - I guess she was having a hating on her particular day. Because now time has passed and indeed the two of them are working on something. I'm genuinely happy for my friend. It has put my nose out of joint tho.
So maybe it is my turn to be the possessive lesbian and I should go round finger fucking women like I was the aforementioned man? HA.
Actually I think it might have more to do with my absolute horror about getting forgotten about which stems from childhood favouritism, my parents not coming to a school party, my father missing my swimming tests, bullied at school etc etc. [a moment to cry folks and could have possibly deleted the whole paragraph] And something I definitely will not talk about here. Unless I'm totally drunk and wearing heels.



And speaking of being a lesbian - Max was apparently having a conversation with XXCENSOREDXX about how much I love cock. It is always a bit uncertain with Max when he has a glass of Rosé in his hand as to whether it is Tourette's at that moment, or he had it while talking to XXCENSOREDXX, or was serious then or laughing now. Either way I found it funny. He teases me constantly about XXCENSOREDXX and how I should get with him. Personally Pippa and I think it is because Max's wants to vicariously have sex with XXCENSOREDXX himself. The thing about loving cock - Mum if you are reading this - that is what MAX said not me.

And for the first time ever, I will reveal a XXCENSOREDXX by way of a photographic clue:



He is one of the men in this picture. And I am certain that he must find me so attractive sitting here in hot pink polka dot flannel pyjama bottoms, a Silas red t-shirt, and orange Ralph Lauren sweatshirt I cut into a cardigan, powder blue Falke socks and red Chanel flip flips eating banana muffins I cooked for dinner cause I had nothing else in the house whining about my life. So seriously Max's match making would be worse for him than me.

Yeah I should go to bed. But before I do:



This is the part of myself I absolutely hate hate hate the most. Compared to everything - all parts of me inside and out. This is it. We can all see that I would make an excellent Christmas ham and where the surgeons knife should go or straw or whatever he would do to get rid of the grossness on the inner AND outer thighs.

Hello friend. We are back together again like we should be and I have no secrets from you.

xx Lektrogirl

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Thursday, 25 September 2008

A VICTORIAN HOOKER


IMG_0345, originally uploaded by All About Eve Babitz.

Max said I looked like a Victorian hooker when I went down the stairs to the shop to meet Pippa on our way to the Jeyjon gig at what once was the Raymond Review Bar. I then offered to have sex with Max and give him Syphilis but he refused on the grounds he doesn't do it with women.

#115


#115, originally uploaded by tetheredto.

Yeah. Hi.

Tonight I cried in a hippy vegan restaurant with pipe music eating vegan stroganoff with one of my oldest bestest friends thinking about what a total loser I feel and blah blah. Then I went to Trannyshack and met someone who performs as slutty called Rani. He was amazing. Then I called another friend in the taxi on the way home.

Life changes too fast.

Monday, 22 September 2008

FUCK YOU ANYWAY


HowManyOfMe.com
LogoThere are
103
people with my name EMMA DAVIDSON in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

I LOVE US


Triple Trouble but Obvs Max doesn't feel like he can fuck with me and Pippa who were INDEED holding hands. Boy we get around.


Me seducing Foul Play Fowler into drawing a street map. I think it's working!?


And here is my little nephew Sam with his sister apple cheek Chloe on his first day at his new school - a Catholic one! - looking SOOOO cute I want to eat their faces off! I LOVE THEM!

xx Lektrogirl

AKLGPOVM JADOPJF OPFPGOPEJG

I know lame lame lame

Too much to tell you all about but meltdowns all over the place. Even celebrities were not having a good day - Chris Moyles [?] in the Palmerston left his wallet at the table and had to come back for it. Everyone except for Russel Brand who walked passed Café Mozart today with rather relaxed hair. Maybe he was having a bad hair day? I didn't think of that. How was your day? The Cardinal heard she may have to wear Coffee or Strawberry bridesmaid dresses [visions of Neapolitan ice cream anyone? Enough to make anyone turn Muriel's wedding if you ask me.] XXCENSOREDXX's true colours turned out to be less Over the Rainbow and more yellow this weekend - such a loser. I woke up this morning feeling super sad for about half an hour but then realised that all that heavy heart was gone gone gone like I'd Cillit Banged myself.

Anyway got to go to bed now. Busy week. New boots. Martin Margeila. J'ai mes regles etc.

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Sunday, 21 September 2008

SUPERDUCK WAS WRONG

You were wrong Superduck. Not so super now. I pity I don't care more about actually happened. I'm more disturbed that you are not the oracle I once thought.

Today I thought I died and went to Heaven and I opened my eyes in the Maison Martin Margiela store all white and heavenly with Valeria today. I even bought the earrings with tassels on for when God next time has a party in Heaven. And when it is fancy dress, I will just wear one and be an angel pirate.

Anyway so Laura's mate - what was your name? the one with the earring and the red hair - call me when you track down my boots. Some heads are gonna roll!

xx Lektrogirl

Thursday, 18 September 2008

TERRORDOME MELTDOWN

God I walked into my flat tonight and just thought "I CANT TAKE THIS ANY MORE WHO AM I FOOLING??!!"

I was just in the West End buying a suit thinking "Yer dress my age so together life is good" and I get home and am greeted by the Terrordome Meltdown aka "my flat" with polystyrene, tools, ironing board, sewing machine, turntables, computer, lamps, cables, craft supplies, a door, clothes [clean and wet, clean and dry, dirty] in a layer all over the place, pattern pieces, half sewn pieces of clothes and the whole place smells like a turgid pussy's pussy cause I cooked fish for dinner last night and didn't clean the frying pan. At least there are no old tea cups here and there.

But fuck me - will I ever grow up? To the sound track of R Kelly's album 'Double Up' I'm going to get stuck in tonight and have a clean up shit fit [I did mop the kitchen floor yesterday - I know! Incomprehensible!]

Sorry I have been so absent lately - I was too busy being busy to get round to blogging - it's tough being all Sheena Easton but I have 6 months of debt to pay off. But other news in brief - the ignoring vortex from The Troll is over which was all pretty yawnsville, Superduck has a poo story that he is too embarrassed about to even tell me - I might tell him the one about Noodles on the train to see if I can exchange it out of him, some dirty Japanese woman left her used sanitary towel in the toilets of Liberty today [don't worry I took a picture], hmmmm I know I have some top gossip about a celebrity as well but I can't think of it right now.

xx Lektrogirl

Tuesday, 16 September 2008

WISH YOU WERE HERE


Wish You Were Here, originally uploaded by Least Wanted.

Monday, 15 September 2008

EXTREME ANIMALS


david hearts myspace, originally uploaded by le_cornell.

Although I am sure they look quite different, I wouldn't be surprised if their lives on tour was pretty much the same.

xx Lektrogirl

Sunday, 14 September 2008

THE JOHN DAVIDSON FAN CLUB #?!

From: John Davidson [mailto:XXCENSOREDXX@hotmail.com]
Sent: 14 September 2008 02:34
To: Emma Davidson
Subject: RE: MY thanks for yr seemingly happier email.


The chapel is in the next room to this comp room, The Chaplain came and smiled at Max and I, then shook her head, wistfully. No hope for we two sinners, mate. Thiugh we are comforted by the thought that if Jesus loved sinners, we are due a bundle of love from the Hairy Ghost. O or off the cross.How'd you get the mozzie bites, Chalie? Not uncovering innappropriately in the park, I hope. Might be the same family of mozzies that bit my arse on V.E.Day at the end of WW1. I scored an A.T.S. SGT. She was on the Victory parade with us 'Old Soldiers(I was 19 and had four years under my belt including service in Italy. She was my first English blow through. The first was an ancient old Hungarian shiela in the snow in a paddock ioutside Trieste, Northern Italy. Her father was an Italian Mussolini Nazi. H e would have stuck a bayonet up me jacksie if he had found me on top of his daughter. I'm still here, so the bastard didn't see a mound of snow going up and down in the paddock. T.I.F.I He's dead now, for sure. So is she, I reckon. She was old enough to be me mother 60 years ago. FARK.
The bloody KIWIS DID US OVER LAST NIGHT AR RUGBY UNION Rhe black bastards. Though to be fair we were in front for the second half but we just hsadn't got the bottle to finish on top.
Thanks for he email, mate. You'll never know how much it brightens an otherwise pissy day when YOU commumicate with me. Thanks a lot. Keep up the good fight mate. Tomorrow Might be a better day. We might win the LOTTO.aND THEN WE HAVE TO BE PREPARED That we won't It's only muckin foney Cheers E.J. Thanks again. Kuv ex yer ancient DadXXXXX.

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Saturday, 13 September 2008

FUN FOODS


Fun Foods, originally uploaded by tracky_birthday.

Friday, 12 September 2008

KNIFE CRIME

Last night was Craft Night and it has to be said that the blades come out in full force.

Mr Chips seriously got cut up...



The cardboard vibes brought make everyone Thugly!!







But that is how we roll.

I'm seriously in the bin at the moment, but my life could be worse:



here is the Britney impersonator from the other night with XXCENSOREDXX. So amazingly wrong. If the sound system wasn't so shocking I could have stayed all night. Nice silk flame. Nice SEX t-shirt.

Hot news is that I have heard that both Warren G and Busta Rhymes have BAAAAAD breath from someone who has met them both. One kiss from Warren G then and you are instantly regulated!

xx Lektrogirl

Thursday, 11 September 2008

SPORTIN WAVES


Sunday Afternoon Shopping, originally uploaded by Lektrogirl.

My sign came today! I was woken up too early by the DHL man and was surprised at how big the package was... I didn't open it straight away cause I wanted to string it out for a bit the excitement. When I did open it I was blown away sideways. Henry's model face is so beautiful and his eyes follow you round the room. He's my new boyfriend.

Look at him and listen to this [I've post it before] and get all Wo se mbaa



xx Lektrogirl

TELL YOU LATER



This video is really funny. I'll tell you about it later.

And you know what my Dad says, one door closes and another one opens. I'll to you about that now.

I saw XXCENSOREDXX tonight. We had dinner in town. Only it wasn't totally him but it was also totally him. I have to tell you - he is the best dressed guy. So totally elegant without looking all Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen. I cannot tell you how impressed I was. Srsly. SO HOT. I looked like a fugly manosaur. But XXCENSOREDXX manners are so impeccable that his compliments were perfect. And you know when you can just chat away away away like all the way to nowheresville and back and still be laughing no uptight nothing telling you what to do and say. What a dream. Can't wait to hang out again. HEY XXCENSOREDXX I KNOW YOU WILL BE CHECKING UP ON ME!

Okay so two cocktails, a glass of red and a glass of G&T with Britney impersonator "two for a fiver" I gotta go to bed!!!

xx Lektrogirl

Tuesday, 9 September 2008

1 GIRL 1 CUP


1girl, 1cup, originally uploaded by nirE cigaM.

Today I am totally heavy hearted. I mean - he's below your league you need a man 'you're a prick you were wrong' stand up for yourself and don't let yourself be part of the negative problem 'you're being an idiot' so amazing 'not impressed' you can make each other happy 'he won't make you happy' i love you 'you aren't attractive any more'.

Everyone - I can't keep up with you - you are driving me crazy! Which way is fucking up?

The answer to that is neither way. Because ultimately, I'm a nihilist.

xx Lektrogirl

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Monday, 8 September 2008

DROP THAT ASS









Hydraulic Style - DJ Nasty

Listen to the counter melody? Or does it count as a melody? Or just a synth line? It's so beautiful! And while you are dropping that ass to the ground - which is something people can do with all ass sizes - we don't have to be all bootylicious about this - why not check to see who got kicked to the curb lately? It might just surprise you!



I actually untagged this picture of myself on Facebook. I don't know why I bothered cause I have a totally private profile. I regret untagging it now. Because you know me - Mrs. No Secrets. The last time I was in the Glasshouse was years ago with Nick Phillips / Noodles drinking Ayingerbrau [a.k.a. The Angry Brew] Rail slide down a tube station bench on my shoulder [how I did that I will never know] and throwing up all night bright orange vomit until Noodle's flatmates thought I was gonna lose a liver. Speaking of Noodles, I saw ANDREW HARTWELL of all people at PIZZA the other night. AND BDL walked past while our whole table got a glacial vibe shower from his girlfriend. AND FOUL PLAY FOWLER. The shame. That hadn't happened to me since about 1999 when Karl Hutchinson, Chris Chang Towers, Dan Moss and someone else - probably Smiler all rolled into The Bricklayers Arms AND SAT AT THE SAME TABLE. I was there with The Witch at the time choking on my pint. See how much I have changed? I would down pints back then with a full face of make-up with a severe bob and Prada shoes.

I'm off to have more of a living room disco chill out and max out those dance vibes. So much fun.

xx Lektrogirl

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Sunday, 7 September 2008

JUST A NOTE


Sunday Afternoon Shopping, originally uploaded by Lektrogirl.

Less like elephantiases as foot in mouth when it comes to a beautiful compliment someone made about me and choux pastry and I had to remember some bullshit blow job story. So wrong. No wonder some people think I'm a dick head.

xx Lektrogirl

ME & MACKULCY KULKIN

Both home alone last night.

Had a WICKED time though before that at PIZZA which is Cesca's mates party. Me and Mr Chips totally cleaned up the dance floor together. So happy! I really needed a dance out. I drank far too much and am a bit hung over today. Thank Allah that there is a lunch date planned with the Kuntish Frown crew [The Cardinal, The Air Commodore] at The Junction Tavern. Be there at 2pm if you have a score to settle and have a mind to shank. I'll be ready for you.

I bought two Marjan Pejoski shirts the other day and am LOVING them. Here is a fucking overly gross picture of me in one of them.



In other news, here is Pippa's son Joe.



Isn't it great being a kid?

xx Lektrogirl

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Saturday, 6 September 2008

RAINY SATURDAY


Shelving, originally uploaded by Beniah Brawn.

I'm so in love with these pictures that Frecker has been uploading. He has one of the best Flickr streams.

Well what did I do today? Well more to the point, what have I been doing with my life the past few days? I'm not sure - I've been so busy that I had to sleep from 8pm to 11am last night missing Law and Order: Special Victims Unit and Cocadisco and XXCENSOREDXX making special faces with XXCENSOREDXX. God I wish I could tell you the details of that but I can't. Oh Lord!!

Today The Cardinal and I braved the foulest weather that was so LONGING me out to go to the fabric shop on Kingsland Road to buy some material to make The Cardinal a skirt. We found some great eye prints and great crown prints. NICE. Then after persistant phone calls from Mr Chips we went down to Brick Lane to see Silverlink with Jammer and Badness shooting the video for "The Message is Love".



When we got there, a gang of people were jumping around with flags to the track and Mr Chips was going CCRRAAZZYY. I wondered why he was puffing so much when he answered the phone. And then I knew why. I hadn't lolled so much since I was in the bin with him after dinner:



and



The Cardinal and I took a moment to absorb the various carnivalesque outfits galdem were wearing - neon pink stuff, one was dressed as a bee - all in hooker shoes. Not sure how I felt about that. Or the outfit that Jammer had on later that looked a little bit like girls pyjamas from Woolworths in shade of lavender. What happened to this boss look that Jammer used to merk?



As I have said before, it would be my dream to be a menswear stylist. Now that I have met Cesca who has promised that we can be a team then maybe it will be true. Silverlink was looked banging of course. He was wearing slightly less baggy trousers than normal. I want him to take them in just a little bit more and I would if Cesca and I were his personal stylists.

The Cardinal and I had lunch at Canteen and again the service was shoddy and they gave me a cappuccino instead of a latte. YGM?! NOT ON!! Also the Welsh Rarebit was over cheesy etc. I always assume that place is going to be better than it is and swear never to go back. Most importantly today I totally won out the game "Your Boyfriend" against The Cardinal. She had hangoverface so she wasn't on the ball. I even cleaned up with the game "You In Ten Years" which I invented in the same moment.

Tonight I am going out to PIZZA. Which I hope will be fun.

xx Lektrogirl

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Thursday, 4 September 2008

FUN AND GAMES


Wednesday, 3 September 2008

Black Bike Week 2008 223


Black Bike Week 2008 223, originally uploaded by beachtoyota.

N how I roll

BUMP


bump, originally uploaded by Least Wanted.

This is how it felt waking up this morning!

xx Lektrogirl

Tuesday, 2 September 2008

VAT IS FUN!

How can doing the slightly overdue VAT return be the best fun you've had for ages. Well of course when it is with Pippa Brooks and it turns into a couple of drinks [Miller's Gin and Tonic] down The French with Nathaniel [M Goldstein's in the house!!!] and Foul Play Fowler who was very kissy kissy and making jokes about drawing me in the nude - but as we all I know I never sow the same field twice.



Here is M. Goldstein stopping to do some poppers with his girlfriend. Talk about heat magazine circle of shame. Look at the tan lines round the ankles! Do you think that guy is thinking about losing his trousers cause he has his key around his neck?



Here is my new boyfriend on the way to our wedding.

The other night could have turned out to be really depressing. It was a barbeque date with friends. One 'friend' was super rude didn't bother to call and cancel til the last minute much to the disdain of those present as we all tutted under our breath. If we were going to a club different story, but if it is to your home with food and stuff - hello - common courtesy? LOLZ. Anyway it turned out to be another magical night with Mr Chips, Cesca and I playing dress up and having a 'photo shoot' with the smouldering Mr Chips as a model.







Anyway Jah / Allah / God / Buddah etc - today is LONG. Work, Dr's appointment, working for Pippa LONG. All night.

xx Lektrogirl