Friday, 28 September 2007

BEIGE

Milan is very beige grey and black. And when I'm walking past people do stare at what I'm wearing. I forgot what that was like once I left Tasmania. I made Brains laugh the other day saying that I was so cool I stopped clocks when I went past cause I'm telling them what time it is.

Today I was in the cab going back to the hotel and out of the window was an Australian flag. It made me cry.

xx Lektrogirl

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I'M SECURE

Hot from Milano...
Was just on the phone to Brains telling him about wassup in Milan and the party last night. So many cool pairs of glasses on every one but it freaked me out none of them had lenses in them. All the boys looked like they were off a Bobby Orlando sleeve. Anyway I was in the loo at the time - which isn't gross cause technically we are still married - chatting away singing the PC World jingle and punctuating the conversation with other random stuff. going on abouit the weather etc. Someone was knocking at the door a few times while I was hitching up my tights. Out I came to be greeted by the scowls of 8 Italian women all identical to each other all petite with patent leather boots and expensive hand bags and giant me in a pink and green tshirt purple tights pretending to be Tim Westwood down the phone.
Well I found it funny.
There is the NIKE party tonight and a gang of others. If any of the parties are like last night that will be mega fun.
Xx Lektrogirl
p.s. Donatella Versace looks fucking babyfaced compared to some of the creatures at the show.

MILANO III [Party Time]

How many coffees? Not sure, but they all look as good as this:



Food like this:



Art like this:



Friends like this:


Make friends in any language - teach them something new.


Happiness like this [ITALO WILL NEVER DIE]

Party like this:



After going to some PIGMAG party, running ino Kesh of all people, watching glitter tape fall from the sky, seeing Sarah from Colette, dancing to tunes and meeting loads of funny Italians ["You are more Rock and Roll than them, No?" [my new boyfriend...]] and trashing Roxy's room after raiding three mini bars, there is only one thing left to say:



xx Lektrogirl

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Thursday, 27 September 2007

MILANO DUO

There isn't really a lot to say about Milan other than it rains a lot, the people are friendly, there is a guy who is cute who does the security to our area at WHITE, but when you look at him face on, maybe he is looking at your friend: he is really boss eyed. I have had a lot of boyf's tell me that they find that sexy in a girl. Can't say I share the predeliction. [spelling]. <--- HAHAHA JO APPS remember LAP TOP FACE/?!! I'm sitting in my hotel room at the desk in from of a big mirror checking my own laptop face - I look amazing of course.

Tonight KH has booked us a table at some restaurant that is meant to be the best fish place in town. She also booked us in there on Saturday as well. Last night was a pretty awesome joint we found by accident and I had apple sorbet for dessert. COUNTRY APPLE. That was a joke for ANTOINE CATALA. Nameless - we also have something about that too, but the one with Antoine was funnier.

Everything feels like a weird dream here - not helped by the fact I had a giant whiskey sour with Roxy after work today.

xx Lektrogirl

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Wednesday, 26 September 2007

MILANO

Well after the first day in Milan that seems like it stretched for eternity - I was up at 4am... - we arrived, it pissed with rain, we got cold, wet and grumpy, then went shopping for warmer clothes. In the meantime I saw and video taped loads of neon lights that Paul and I might use for our new video we are working on and homeless beggars with weird limbs that I couldn't look at properly without feeling sick.

More from me later. Plus pictures.

xx Lektrogirl

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Tuesday, 25 September 2007

TOILET TROUBLES

I raced down to the ladies loo a little while ago and there was an olive green stinky floater in there laid by some vegetarian girl. It stunk too bad so I went up the corridor to the other ladies [I don't like to use the disabled loos after I learnt one of my workmates had been rooting in there. There was later a few poo smears on the toilet cistern that never got cleaned so I don't go back.] anyway the door was locked on the other womens loo's and I had to use the men's.

In the bottom of the men's toilets, was a single key. What a mystery.

Nameless told me that he pisses in his sink. With great delight I pissed over the edge of his bath and I wish I didn't laugh so loudly cause he never would have know otherwise.

Paul and I have been hanging out together a lot cause we are going to make a video for The Fonts. It is going to be incredible. Watch this space.

xx Lektrogirl

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Monday, 24 September 2007

RANDOM

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Sunday, 23 September 2007

ONE FOR THE LADIES

Last night I couldn't help but feel a bit sheepish about the amount of fun I was having with three other girlfriend's in a restaurant talking about men and the similarities to that TV show Sex In the City with the horse faced once that I never really got into.

Oh how we laughed!!

Look - no fillings! [and a VINTAGE milk fed t-shirt FYI for anyone who knows anything]

This is my cacking myself at Sarah Lee [who is an amazing photographer who does a lot of stuff for the shop] who can't throw signs with ease - but she is very good and making shadow puppets of dogs who could adopt the personality of various past lovers from Pippa, Jasmine and I. My lord - we laughed till we cried telling each other the calls from the vinegar strokes: Sarah told of a man who said "It's coming" in the same tone of voice as Prince Charles when he saw a really ugly building. I told of a man who said "There you go" when he shot his load, but I also heard him use the same phrase on the phone to his mother when then were cracking each other up! Jasmine had a fella say "I've got a surprise for you". Pippa was more of a lady about divulging her tales but the ladylike behaviour dropped to the wayside when she cackled at the rest of our stories. We also discussed size, impotency and a variety of other men's health problems [their brains...] But I can't divulge more. Cause that would be telling.


We ate at a restaurant of Sarah's choice - a tapas place in Mornington Crescent.

I've been a bit lax photographing things lately but I remembered to take a photo of our food after it was mostly finished. I ordered roast beetroot with onions and chestnuts, fennel with spinach and pinenuts and chicory salad. I nicked a lot of Sarah's chorizo and she nicked all the pine nuts.

Pippa named her sardines Sylvia and Little Joe. No surprise then that she couldn't eat the fish named after her son...


We weren't even drunk but we spent ages taking pictures of ourselves with these brooches. All the amazing ones - of people looking horrendous had to be deleted but there were some real corkers! What is actually unbelieveable about this is that I sat there doing possibly the most retarded thing I've done in ages and I was missing CSI and Law and Order at home. Thank god I made it back for Criminal Minds!!

And today I have a lot of web work to try and do for Maria, and mountain of laundry and sorting my house out. If anyone wants to come and clean the floors - they need mopping - I'll pay them £20 for an hours work.

xx Lektrogirl

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Saturday, 22 September 2007

WHAT PIPPA DID!!



The other night when we were making another video and little Harry got wacked in the face, Pippa took the tapes away and this is what she made! She is nearly as good as me!!

This is all SONIA by SONIA RYKIEL you can buy in the shop and some catwalk stuff from the SS08 Eley Kishimoto catwalk show. Woo hoo!

xx Lektrogirl

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HOT NEWS IN HOBART

Myer store fire shuts down Hobart centre



A massive fire is burning through a Myer department store in Hobart, threatening surrounding buildings in the CBD.
It is understood that one floor of the multi-storey building in Liverpool Street has collapsed.
Roads surrounding the area have been closed to traffic and pedestrians have been banned from entering a police exclusion zone for safety reasons.
It is understood the blaze started around 3.30pm (AEST) on Saturday.
A massive plume of thick, black smoke hung over the building late on Saturday afternoon as the blaze intensified, forcing fire crews to back away from the Liverpool street area.
There have been no reports of injuries at this stage.
Police said the Liverpool St part of the building had been destroyed and the roof had collapsed.
The building is one of Tasmania's most historic, dating back to 1836.
Fire crews from all over the city were attending the blaze and a large part of the CBD had been evacuated, a police spokesman said.
Shoppers fled the fire as the large department store was engulfed in flames.
A Tasmanian Police spokeswoman said shoppers and staff were evacuated from the busy department store on the corner of Liverpool and Murray streets.
"Fire crews are attempting to stop the fire from spreading to nearby buildings," the spokeswoman said.
"There are no injuries from the fire. All customers and staff were safely evacuated."
It is not known how many people were in the building before the blaze took hold.
"There is nothing to indicate at this stage that the fire was suspicious," the spokeswoman said.

I just gave Mum a weekend morning call and she was telling about how there was a black out last night at home and it blew her modem. I was trying to convince her to get wireless [cause I'm gonna be there with my laptop at Christmas of course.] I was asking why she let me marry an asshole and she cut me off with the news that Myer was on fire at the very moment we were talking which is far more interesting news than only the last three years of my tortured life. Myer has been with me for much much longer.

Myer is the "posh" department store in town - they sell POLO by Ralph Lauren for men there and they are probably amongst the most expensive shirts you can buy in town. Tho' I didn't check over the road in Routley's to check the competition. They also have this massive stair case up through the central section of the part of the store that is burning down which terrified me from a very young age. They are the kind of stairs that you can see through on the riser part of each step. I used to be terrified of heights when I was little and I used to scream all the way up these stairs. When they still sold vinyl, they had a really good sale bin section there where I got all my Stock Aitken and Waterman stable hits from in there. I'm sure all the other stores in town are rubbing their hands with glee at the thought of the boost in sales for them at Christmas time cause it sounds like the store is wrecked, but it is a worry for all the staff members who were lucky to get a job in Hobart anyway. What are they gonna do now?

xx Lektrogirl

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Friday, 21 September 2007

NICE PICTURE


Here is a cool picture of Katie, Kellie and Cissi from the blonde vs brunettes party Roxy promoted the other night.

Apparently Prancehall, Easychord and Brains are hanging out together eating wings and talking hip-hop. Brains said if I wanted to call by I was welcome, and I considered it cause any excuse for House of Wings - and I wanted to pick up my portable turntable but the thought of hanging out with guys... but I can almost smell the tube socks from here! And boys love hanging out together - watching YouTube videos and talking about hip-hop.... errrr hang on a minute.... that is what I am doing here on my own anyway.... Am I a boy?

I wonder what my friend Lu Weed is doing these days?

xx Lektrogirl

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Thursday, 20 September 2007

BLACK BY POPULAR DEMAND


I went and visited Madame Tussards the other days and saw this waxwork depicting Whitney Houston after Bobby Brown gave her the crack pipe.
Ho ho. Indeed this is the lovely Kesh from the Coconut Twins eating lunch on the stand at London Fashion Week. I heard some bad things from other people about her and so I was a bit tentative about getting to know her, but I got to say that after hanging out with her, I really like her. She cracks me up man. Well I dunno - she laughed at my jokes at least!


Here is a new t-shirt that I got off eBay. I saw it a while ago and asked Paul if he wanted it and that I would get it for him. In the meantime between that email and receiving the t, Paul has ended up in this relationship with the polyamorous curator. I'm not feeling so generous about the t-shirt any more. I dunno - I put on the t-shirt this morning to wear to work and I felt really happy. I have been crying my eyes out recently. PAUL - I WANT THE HAPPY FUCKING T-SHIRT! YOU GET ME!!?

xx Lektrogirl

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HAHAH AHAHHAHA HAHA!!!

I was talking to the hottest photographer I know today and was telling him that Nameless has a new girlfriend. At first he didn't believe me and he was saying "What that one that dances with her boyfriend identically - that you see them bobbing their heads identically??! Like exactly the same?" And when he finally realised I wasn't joking, he wooped out "Ohhhh FUCK BRAINS MAN!! He's going bald anyway!!!!!"

I laughed til I nearly choked.

Thanks photographer friend. You really really made my day.

xx Lektrogirl

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KATHARINE HAMNETT AND THE HAMNETTE



Bored at London Fashion Week Katharine and I pose for a multitude of pseudo porno pictures with the Boom Box book. On the wall behind us are all the amazing pics of Kesh and the other models in the SS08 collection.

Paul told me the other night I was a "bit fat".

x Lektrogirl

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Wednesday, 19 September 2007

MY PUSSY

Oh my days! The Boom Box book is out and Katharine had been invited to take pictures for it. One of them is up my snatch at the last Christmas Party for KH. So if you wanna see what my fanny looks like, go check the book!!

xx Lektrogirl

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OUT OF BREATH

If anyone else has got anything shit to tell me, today would be a great day to do it.

I woke up with morning with tears all over my face and aching. Totally unable to move, my heart was totally broken, I just realised I had been holding my breath for the last 8 hours in my sleep. I know that sounds lame, but anyone who is human knows about these awful feelings. So I called my Mum - tears cascading everywhere and she soon put it right.

Last night, Paul finally had to admit that he is fucking the curator. How embarrassing for them. It isn't that weird as he habitually gets together with females he thinks can further his career. His last girlfriend was bitching to him about it when they broke up, Paul and I spent 3 years arguing about it and he has just gone and done it again. It also isn't a surprise cause I was saying to Roxy and Kellie just down at LFW walking along the tunnels to South Kensington tube - I ALREADY KNOW - I just dont want to be the last TO KNOW. Paul and I are tight though and he tells me everything. He is also really easy to pump for the juice! OMG it was like totally XXCENSOREDXX!!! Philippa!! Where are you!?? Come back from Florida!! I need to go for a Sunday Roast with you...

I don't feel that bad about this new stuff going on. Paul is a loser and even he is the first to admit it. He also admits he was a shit husband but that I was an amazing wife who really did a great job. Yo! Big ups me. The thing that was totally weird was just before he went home, all the feelings I should have experienced on my wedding day about the amazingness of being married to someone you love so much just went through me. I never let myself feel like that ever cause I was always more worried about the day he was going to dump me. Nevermind - Paul and I did everything back to front.

Now! I really got to get ready for work! Being down in the tents for LFW is totally bizarre and you see some incredible [in every way that word can be applied] looking people. It is funny watching the Eley Kishimoto catwalk shows too cause in the background behind the models, sitting in the front row are Max and Pippa with Joe and Duke on their knees. Really hilarious. Yesterday I was watching the telly on the phone to Pippa giving her a blow by blow account "now you are scratching your ear.... Now you are REALLY sticking your finger right in there. Oh my God! the look on your face!!! you really hate that dress!!!!"

xx Lektrogirl

P.S. All flowers and condolences for my broken heart please send to Paul to make him feel bad. All guys look for a hot date email me! I am not splitting my income any more with anyone else so I can take you to dinner somewhere real good.

And Koyote - I think I got dumped another time right now...

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Sunday, 16 September 2007

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!

The show will be open!

This weekend, Bex and I put together the stand for London Fashion Week. Bex is the new girl and she is learning fast - check her out - she already has the new office throw mastered!


Two in the pussy and one in the butt.


We spent hours with the spray glue putting up all the posters on the wall at the back of the stand. We didn't forget to tag the wall underneath btw - Emma and Bex was here 2007 BIG UP US!! It was a bit gross though, I kneeled on a broken of drill bit still jammed in the floor and punctured my knee. I had to go and see the first aide man and get it all swabbed out with disinfectant. Of course I got the tee tree oil on it when I got home and that was way better. But my knee is still feeling weird now.

After, we strolled down to Ladureé for some macaroons - Bex never went to Harrods before!! And the windows were all dolled up in Harvey Nichols for London Fashion Week.

My first job in London was in Harvey Nichols. It was still fancy then - we weren't allowed to wear open toed shoes!

And finally - from the desk of the biggest pimp in London:

Desktop courtesy of DJ Goon and DJ Koyote from Diamond Grilling.

xx Lektrogirl

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Friday, 14 September 2007

NASTY NETS

Well in the excitement of Paris last week and the hype of getting ready for London next week I forget to tell you all about another awesome thing. I got invited to join NASTY NETS (I'll do the hyperlink later - I'm on my phone and you can't do html on it)

If you don't know already, Nasty Nets is a surfing club started in NYC that displays the flotsum and jetsom from the WWW and talks about it and does projects together etc. People who I totally rate as artists like Olia Lialina and Tom Moody have members for a while. So I'm pretty stoked. But even so, I have a lot of q's about Nasty Nets - I have to see how many glitter unicorn gifs keep appearing on the internet these days because glitters are like totally over. (Says me who put one on her Nasty Nets profile...)

I can't type fast enough on my phone for what I want to say here so I'll finish it at a later date.

xx Lektrogirl

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Thursday, 13 September 2007

BLONDES VERSUS BRUNETTES 2


Hey! I'm the blue robot - you better not get on my bad side! - particularly the part in the club with the other shit DJ. Cause tomorrow night I'm DJing at BLONDES VERSUS BRUNETTES II



There is also the BRUNETTES HAVE MORE FUN option, and there are t-shirts printed. WOO HOO! Pippa is also spinning and Team Mega Mix. It is gonna be awesome!

Last night I spent shooting video in the street for Madame with girls and hula hoops. It was pretty cool. Except the part where little Harry who is four got hit in the face with a hula hoop. He rolled around on the ground at Romilly Street refusing to look at anyone. I tried to tell him what happened to me when I was rolling around on the pavement there some weeks ago and picked up a homeless man's bum crack lurgy that made me sick for weeks.


Today is total wipeout city for me - by lunch time my brain just couldn't think any more - so I came home and slept all afternoon. Ohhhh no!! I can hear XXCENSOREDXX in the other room trying to get Eat Zone noodle house to home deliver, but they are coming back with the old story that they won't deliver because "Our driver come and kids in the street hit him down." I know which kid it is - it is the midget one with the glasses who must be only 14 or 15. Looks we have to get sushi instead.

xx Lektrogirl

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Tuesday, 11 September 2007

HOME AGAIN

I'm back from Paris - it was amazing! I didn't do loads of shopping for clothes - my bags were too full of samples. Instead I bought loads of jewellery. I was flipping through the pictures on my camera on the train home and I really didn't take many this trip -which is not at all like me! So in a snap decision I thought it would be a great idea to do a photoshoot in the toilets of the Eurostar featuring my new jewellery.


I was born in the Chinese year of the Rat. "Being the first sign of the Chinese zodiac, rats are leaders, pioneers and conquerors. They are charming, passionate, charismatic, practical and hardworking. Rat people are endowed with great leadership skills and are perhaps the most organized and systematic of the twelve signs."


Bijoux By Sophie. The shop that sells this jewellery is always closed when I'm in Paris. This time it was open and look what I got!!


My new bakelite cicada. There was a whole felt covered in them at the antique jewellery store. I'm now in love with it and will collect more. I daren't tell you how much this was...

xx Lektrogirl

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Sunday, 9 September 2007

SERIOUSLY LAGGING

Today Goon and I are sitting at the stand with our eyes propped open with matchsticks. I'm sure that Katharine and Roxy are probably the same on their plane to New York! I heard them getting up at the hotel around 5am this morning. I had only got back from the party about an hour before.


Our stand.

As always it was so cool to see my dog Koyote. And as always he had some beautiful things to say to me. Last time it was he thinks I dance like a German girl. This time he found it hilarous that Paul dumped me twice. Then he was kind of inferring by vibe that I was a salope, [I couldn't deny it outright but would have liked to] and then when I explained that my life has changed he called me a "Retired Slut". It makes me sound like j'ai une chatte comme les abricots secs.


Connard qui j'adore.

Also, Fanny came and she wore her KH tshirt too! Here is Goon telling you all what to do - send me an email and tell me how you are.


The new E t-shirt is gonna be a big hit guys. Believe dat.

xx Lektrogirl

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I'M NEVER COMING HOME

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Saturday, 8 September 2007

C'EST TROP RUPTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today there were four meufs who where super excited to see all the Katharine Hamnett stuff - They were saying it was really new rave. Then they said "C'est trop RUPTURE!" which means nothing but sounds awesome. Teenie Slang.

Today on the stand was again good for sales - but there is still loads of time for making trouble. Tous les PD's aiment Goon! Mais il n'y a pas assez des hot straight guys. I made Goon horrified with stories of guys I had slept with who got really small penises. Then YSL's old boyfriend came to the stand to meet Katharine. He is the president of Fashion or something in France.

Now I am watching Italy play Les Blues le foot with Goon eating ham and cheese sandwiches. Soon we go and meet Koyote and chill at some party. But not too late cause we gotta start the stand at 9am again tomorrow...

xx Lektrogirl.

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Friday, 7 September 2007

NO MORE FASHION VICTIMS

WOO HOO IM IN PARIS

And I am so sorry for not being able to update my blog as regularly as usual. Today I saw some old man with only two half legs burning along the road in a mechanised wheelchair that had a bumper sticker "i heart coffeeshops" and on the train into Paris was some Frenglish graffitti "NO MORE VIOLENT". Goon is here with us and I can give him hugs all day and tell him I love him and wish I saw him more often when we aren't busy selling. I've been spying on the two guys in the Loomstate stand - kind of cute! - and the quality of French men is ASTOUNDING as per usual. Katharine has been outrageous - if we don't keep an eye on her she runs off every other minute to have a fag outside and once we had to call her and say "Where are you?" and she had decided to hang out with the security guard called Camel and get him to check peoples bags for something to do. I got the morning off today and spent some time sitting in a cafe drinking coffee and eating tartine getting to check the split ends in my hair - sounds boring but I was loving it - a total change of pace from the hectic spin of the show. And then bizarrely I ended up buying a bunch of stuff in the SONIA RYKIEL ENFANTS store - all for myself - weird pompom brooches and a belt that I'm gonna wear as a headband. I havn't hit any knicker shops yet - I'm saving that for Monday which I will have all to myself.

More soon when I can.

xx Emma

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Monday, 3 September 2007

WATCHED BY THE CLOCK

Oh God the clock is ticking and not even that, the power adapter for my laptop is broken and the battery is running dead.

SO MUCH HAS BEEN HAPPENING! I've been checking the samples and measuring all the prints match specs, taking photos and writing comments. I've been organising samples for a shoot, ordering in catering, packing boxes, preparing to go away for Paris, trying to deal with incoming orders, JoJo leaving to have a baby, picking through photos for lookbooks and line sheets. I'm too tired. I wish I had the time and energy to upload all the pics I have and tell you all about the shoot on Sunday we did and the excellent pics Alex Sturrock took and the hilarious and hot models we had, getting to see Becky Seager again who loved a dirty gossip about all kinds of hideous things - mostly grotty sex and getting drunk - in between singing old rave tunes which the Little Witch Molly and I enjoyed immensly

Sarah Lee has sent me a gang of hot photos from Shop At Maison B as well of Pippa in the new Eley Kishimoto clothes. I didn't even have time to stop and chat with her properly last time I saw her [to spunk money on two new woollie SONIA hats and a SONIA top with gros-grain ribbon details.]

Everybody wish me well and I hope to get the chance to update my blog over the next week. I hope you are all well and making lots of hot gossip.

xx Lektrogirl

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