Monday, 17 November 2008

COMIC BAKERY

Oh yeah and I wanted to mention this site cakefarts.com that Manara sent me this morning.

That one is for you Mum.

xx Lektrogirl

P.S. And I got my period about 15 minutes ago. How can I tell one of my best friends I got all worked up and had a 'talk' then deleted him all over some fucking PMT without looking like some EMO loser?! I guess I will wait a couple weeks and make up some other excuse... God. >>>!!HH!!MM!!LL<<<

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Wednesday, 1 October 2008

THAT FUCKING ANNOYING SEX WOMAN ON TV

FROM MANARA'S FLICKR - another fucking hilarious rant and another reason why I love her:

THAT FUCKING ANNOYING SEX WOMAN ON TV

I put my headphones on immediately. FUCKING CUNT i hate this stupid twat so much she is everything that is wrong with the world today. reinforcing unachievable aspirations, FOR FUCKS SAKE IF YOU CAN'T AN ORGASM THEN FINGER YOURSELF WHILST GETTING BANGED OR GET YOUR MAN TO LICK YOUR PUSSY IT'S NOT HARD. FOR THOSE WHO ARE UNFORTUNATE AND CAN NEVER HAVE THIS, THAT'S THAT A TV SHOW WON'T HELP WILL IT YOU FUCKING VIVACIOUS BUBBLY CUNT. i also hated how she was like 'oh i have nice shoes, and nice pets, so what's missing?' err my shoe kicking you in your fucking cunt? AND she has a boyfriend! i know she's doing it for the money obv but god. i hate how the female orgasm has been standardised as a tangible, set experience that can be analysed by a tv show. besides, most of the world is conceiving without orgasming, i'd love to see her go to bangladesh and teach village women about orgasms. it's not like she's correlating orgasming with power hierarchies or autonomy or anything, the premise it is literally her being unsatisfied with what she's got and wanting to ~dig deeper~. obviously it's mainstream tv and it's going to be shit and offensive but whatever

also i love how in the first ep they watched 2 girls 1 cup lol

Uploaded by s manara on 1 Oct 08, 2.09AM BST.

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Thursday, 10 July 2008

NAMES OF ALLAH

Tonight Mr Crisps and I made jokes about our chosen Muslim names while we sat and had dinner at Wong Kei. I know - Wong Kei and me have had tough times. I'm still not convinced. Mt Crisps name came out something like "Something Giraffe" and mine was "No email" - I picked my name to be after Naima who works at Feasts Cafe. Anyway this is all by the by cause the real crux of this post is to show you the work of a true artist, Sara Manara. You cannot get a better gif than this:



I swear to you - it is the BOMB. Which is probably not the best choice of analogies but you know what I mean. OJ LOL. [Own Joke LOL as coined by the Air Commodore today.]

Then tonight I was at Tramp for the Antony Price party. I was so happy to meet Mrs Price after all this time. He made some good jokes and his glasses were BOSS like a cab driver from Ghana. YGM. And you can't beat that. Ampofo I wish you were there. Hopefully photos to follow soon from Madame and Cazza. Though Cazzaroo was pretty shit faced when I left and quite possible won't be waking up tomorrow until quite late. Her hair was FABULOUS though.

I have to go to bed though. Oh yeah I saw Brian Ferry. And I am the proud owner of a new sterling silver vase.

xx Lektrogirl

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Monday, 16 June 2008

NEW JAMZ


OUT NOW!!!, originally uploaded by bok_bok.

BOK BOK AND MANARA MIX - nice for waking up to.

www.zshare.net/audio/135403945c920f4a

tracklist:
01 * Big MIDI intro
02 * DROP THE LIME - Like Thunder
03 * SCREAMA - Bones
04 * DJ DEEON - Ok
05 * KINGDOM - Bang (Vocal Dub)
06 * BURGA BOY - I Can Love You
07 * Oh Oscillator interlude
08 * MR VIRGO - Hypnotiq
09 * TRC - Freak Me ft ZOE & SCREAMA
10 * BOY 8 BIT - Suspense Is Killing Me (DROP THE LIME remix)
11 * NASTEE BOI - Mussy Mad '08 ft E-MAN
12 * AGENT X - Skanked
13 * DJ ABSURD - Hats To The Back
14 * A DOT R - Flippin Hell ft GRINDSTARR
15 * LEIF - Black Magic
16 * STICKY - Ganjaman
17 * SCREAMA & MERKURY - Get Up
18 * DJ DEEON - Acceler8
19 * JON E CASH - War
20 * DJ MATABAYA ft DJ VR - O Puro
21 * DS1 - Lockoff
22 * JUMPIN' JACK FROST - Pornography
23 * MIDI Nation outro

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Monday, 31 March 2008

SUNDAY NIGHT & FEELIN' RIGHT

Actually I'm feeling pretty exhausted. Lemme make like Craig David and fill U in.

Rewind to Thursday night when I went to YoYo with my HoHo's at the Notting Hill Arts Club. I know that there are a lot of haters for this place and the club that it is but I will say I LOVE IT THERE cause there is absolutely no hating going on in there, loads of attitude [thug love], people are dressed up and the bar serves cocktails - there is always a happy hour cocktail! So G'ed up with the Sinus Spray and Cold and Flu tablets I was sitting sipping Honey and Grapefruit cocktails for the first half of the evening, then when Martello came on -

[Double screwface. Nice teeth.]

- I spent four hours dancing. In fact, Carrie and I even took our glasses off. It was really such a powerful moment. BOOYAH. The BEST part about the night though was instead of the breakdancers busting out which the small dicked lithe men sometimes do, this time the camera phones came out for some Poser-Popping ina big circle in the middle of the floor. Some serious shapes, signs and leans. Sorry for the blurry picture. I had my glasses off remember.



And here are my two pals with their own efforts.



The next day I wasn't feeling too bad. Only bad enough to miss the postman ringing on the doorbell. However a full recovery was required for the launch of the incredible NIGHT SLUGS - Bok Bok and Manara's night down at the Red Star once a month. For such a heavy date, dressing appropriately was required:


Which I have been told is straight gull-ee and fucking badgirl. Not bad for a Tasmanian G right? Someone has to regulate.

Before going, I had been having a deep an esoteric conversation with a friend about the kind of music that would be played. He said that generally bassline is a fake movement. That it only exists up North as something real and that probably it would be just full of bloggers anyway. Funny that - Prancehall, DJ Venom, Manara and Bok Bok all DJ'd and all have blogs. And I blog and I went there. However, my view on bassline and niche is that it is hilarious bouncy pop music and if a scene is 'real' or not I don't care. It seems a bit like thinking yourself out of having too much fun to be academic about it. The party was filled with good time vibes.


I mean - check the look on Bok Bok's face. It was good times all round!

ESPECIALLY ESPECIALLY WHEN:
Prancehall's first track of the night was Snoop Dogg's sexual/sensual seduction/eruption [sorry was too busy dancing to notice which version it was.] It really surprised me because I never pictured him as a particularly sensual guy [bubble bath and vanilla candles?] but his womanly thighs have been pointed out to me by more than one person so perhaps Prancehall feels something in his groin for Snoop Dogg, like I do. Prancehall played a great collection of grimetime hits and grunk and crip crop and areandbee. Good times. Where's the beef? There is none. I was just feeling the love.

It was not a good time however after getting into bed at last at 6am to be woken by the postman at 7.30 delivering a package and he didn't know if it was the one from yesterday or not because he had the day off yesterday. The postman is my most regular male visitor. Which is fitting as he delivers the mail.

Later that morning I had to get up again with some urgency cause by a certain set of co-incidences, my friend Koogs was making a website for Samwell [you know 'What What In The Butt'] and it had to be ready by yesterday evening. Urgh so some frantic .cssing .gifing and .htmling with serious party issues. Not my idea of a Saturday night - especially when Cardinal be calling me for another night out. Which I am so gutted I missed.

BUT there is an upside to being stuck at home - Marisa Olson from Nasty Nets asked me if I wanted to have my video 'The Result' screened at the NY Underground Festival on Friday, April 4th. The Nasty Nets DVD is finished and you will be able to buy it - a 'coolection' of all the best craps from the internet compiled by people from the Nasty Nets Crew. So - awesome. I am so happy! If you want to watch the video for 'The Result' in the comfort of your own living room:
<------ scroll down
<------ check the links
<------ you'll find it there.

Or if you are in New York:


Event InfoName: NASTY NETS at NYUFF - DVD release screening!
Tagline: As Nasty As U Wanna Be
Host: Marisa Olson
Type: Music/Arts - Jam Session
Time and PlaceDate: Friday, April 4, 2008
Time: 8:30pm - 10:30pm
Location: Anthology Film Archives
Street: 32 2nd Avenue
City/Town: New York, NY

Nasty Nets has just produced a DVD (with video & data for maximum pleasure!) and we're releasing it in a screening called NASTY AS U WANNA BE at the 15th (and final) NY Underground Film Festival.

Please come and enjoy, and get your discounted dvd's--$5 while supplies last!

Big thanks to RHIZOME for sponsoring the dvd & screening!
http://nastynets.com/dvd.html
http://www.nyuff.com/2008/index2.php?p=arc&s=res&fid=295

Nasty As U Wanna Be
EXPERIMENTAL VIDEO MIN INTERNATIONAL PREMIERE
Organized by Marisa Olson & the Nasty Nets with support from Rhizome.org

Identifying themselves as an "internet surfing club," Nasty Nets is an international ensemble representing some of the most active artists working online today. Together their work both celebrates and critiques the internet by employing original and appropriated imagery and audio, such as animated gifs, YouTube hacks, html cheat codes, and other found and edited material, offering a poignant and humorous take on contemporary digital visual culture.

This event will serve as a release party for their new dvd, which features videos for dvd players, copious digital files to be opened on personal computers, and a type-in website by Michael Bell-Smith. Tonight's screening will feature videos from the dvd and additional works by members of this 25-person crew.

Nasty Nets was founded by artists John Michael Boling, Joel Holmberg, Guthrie Lonergan, and Marisa Olson, and includes members Peter Baldes, Michael Bell-Smith, Camille Paloque BergeĢs, Kevin Bewers- dorf, Brian Blomerth, Charles Broskoski, Petra Cortright, Chris Coy, Paul B. Davis, Michael Guidetti, Britta Gustafson, Travis Hallenbeck, Chance Jackson, Lektrogirl, Tom Moody, Javier Morales, Paul Slocum, James Whipple, Robert Wodzinski, and Damon Zucconi. The Nasty Nets DVD is generously supported by Rhizome. Discs will be sold at a discount to NYUFF ticket-holders, at the festival, while supplies last. - Marisa Olson

Anyway I better get to bed cause I bet the postman will be here bright and early again in the morning. Which I am so not looking forward to.

xx Lektrogirl

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Tuesday, 25 March 2008

GOT A TISSUE?

Well I'm guessing that there wasn't a lot going on for anyone over the Easter break cause come Saturday, my webstats were through the roof! Thanks for stopping by!

The 'result' of my long weekend is that I have a cold and spent yesterday in bed with Season 4 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation DVD's [the LA one] and then got a total of 3 hours sleep last night. Today I am in my PJ's listening to the Mr Martelo mixes he sent me chilling out in front of the heater. Cardinal is going to be excited to learn that I have to have a section of my wall ripped out to mend some damp and re-plastered just like her and I can't wait to discuss the details with her.

I was also happy to read that Manara had said in one of her Flickr descriptions that I have a beautiful house



A shame that everything in the picture came from IKEA.



A trip to IKEA is more fun that a Racine / Wendy James gig any day of the week however. Last week or so I went with Pippa / Max / Paul Gazz / Caz / Jazz to the Bloomsbury Bowls to check out Wendy James' band. I have to say it was pretty shockingly bad. Had she chosen her band to be the same age as her I think the show would have been more convincing. Sadly the show looked like a bit of a weird Whatever Happened to Baby Jane scenario. And none of the songs were dope.

I heard some really 'dope' songs on Sunday night when I went to GO BANG! at East Village on though. I was going to save writing about it until my sub-editor Alex T told me how to spell Nadia Kasaiba correctly but I was so happy I went out that I can't resist writing soon. I'm sure that next time Alex has eaten a kebab he will be more than happy to breathe the after effects all over me and tell me about my shitty spelling. As per usual I had some spiritual moments with Alex as we discussed the universe. I cried AGAIN! [I know!!!] Which could either be the subject matter of the conversation OR the number of drinks I had consumed. My drink of choice was Malibu and Pineapple. Steph called it 'The Summertime Ho' but I think a better name for it is 'The Sweat'. I was also very happy to meet Alex's friend Amph who guessed I was 26 years old. I'm gonna guess he really thought I was about 29-30 and was being nice. Even so, he will be getting a Christmas card from me this year.

OMG. I just went to Flickr to get another picture to put online and you know what it said to me?

O HAI Lektrogirl!
Now you know how to greet people in Lolspeak!

Errr I don't think so. I think Flickr just overstepped the mark there.

I got a 'zimce' [German for SMS] on my 'handy' from Mrs Vanderbilt in Berlin today. I miss them like crazy already. We went to Canteen the other day before they left and it was pretty terrible.



Bachelor Food. And the waiter didn't find it funny when I asked him what his problem was that they didn't have soya milk for a latte.

Oh this was cool: My nephew Tom who is two and I have this really amazing joke.



It is pretty complicated and esoteric so if you don't get it, I kind of understand. Basically it works like this: I go up to him and say "What's that smell?" and he thinks for a minute and then says "It's me!!" Then we both crack up laughing. It even works over the telephone. It is a really great joke. In a few more years I will teach him a little more toilet humour and lesbian jokes. Anyway Tom is really into Cars and loves being a Jedi [Mum... Can you love a Jedi?] even though he has never managed to stay awake through one entire Star Wars movie.

xx Lektrogirl

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Saturday, 15 March 2008

NIGHT SLUGS



My bestie faves Bok Bok and Manara are starting their residency at their party called - NIGHT SLUGS - London's first and only club dedicated to 4x4 / heavy bass music / global gutter house @ the legendary REDSTAR, Camberwell. DJ Venom is gonna play classic freestyle. I wonder if he has The Sisters with Destiny?

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Friday, 29 February 2008

I BUILT A DESK

Today I was one of those people who sat in Starbucks staring into middle distance sipping on a soapy coffee wishing that I wasn't really there. However, I knew I wasn't beyond redemtion because I was on my way to Homebase to buy some wood for making my desk supports later that afternoon.

Actually it wasn't even a coffee - it was a Soy Chai Tea Latte. LOL.

This morning I woke up without a hangover but felt I deserved one. After hanging out with Max all day, talking about Pantie Wetters, Nannies, Turncoats and Dead or Alive, we went into Soho to see Pippa and Nathaniel and drink some wine. A more wine later at The Three Greyhounds [my first blush since 'The DJ Assualt Night' that I could finish] and then some Geisha Rocks at Abeno Too I was sending random texts about spiritual vibes to God only knows who.


Lovely! So pretty - like sour cherries.

Max had cooked me an Apple and Rhubarb crumble. Until then, all I had heard about Max's cooking capabilities was from his old flatmate Neil who had seen Max take the top off a yoghurt pot and that was it.

But check this out:




I am Max's fantasy girlfriend. He is always asking me if I had sex with a woman. I always get out of answering by asking him if he ever had sex with a woman.


Look at the AWESOME temperature guage on the oven! It reminds me of Gary Numan or The Buggles or something. So jealous. And such a neat crumble.


YUM. And by now, Alex T had come over to Max's too so we all sat and ate crumble together like naughty school children telling naughty jokes.


Here is Max's knicker drawer. No he isn't at all anal.

And check this garden out that Max made. It used to be just rocks and weeds and nothing. It was just nothing and it is so beautiful now.



Someone who isn't quite like Max in some ways [totally anal] but quite like Max in other ways [I think she only fancies men] is my mate Sara Manara who if I was a big licker I would fancy her because she is a good cook and likes good music. Oh - yeah I know she is with Bok Bok so no dis bruv, but your girlf is a babe. And as you know, I'm only interested in guys anyway [I'll tell the rest of my gossipy stories later! LOL and I promise I will keep your secret forever...] I was over at Bok Bok and Manara's house the other night and Manara cooked a BANGING dinner for us all. SO DELICIOUS.


And I gotta tell you, Manara's Pav was almost authentic Australian [we would probably only have raspberries OR strawberries with passionfruit and banana.] It was so awesome. I could have eaten the whole thing to myself.

Mum is sending over some old tea cups and saucers from home that I am really looking forward to receiving in the post. I am planning to have a tea party. I only have two cups right now and one teapot. And it isn't big enough.

xx Lektrogirl

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Friday, 22 February 2008

AMAZING

I will tell you what is really amazing - reading 70's cookbooks, looking at 80's porn and reflecting on memorial pictures of dead families from the turn of last century with Bok Bok and Manara making vag, braap and minge jokes.

Good times. (Gross to the muffy prolaps beef curtains - and that was just the 70's cookbook.)

xx Lektrogirl

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Sunday, 17 February 2008

TWO BABES NO CUPS



I was just organising my Flickr and I found this picture of Manara and Cardinal from when we went to Hamburg together for my birthday last year. What a total TOTAL pair of BABEZ !!!

I mean - what else can you say?!

xx Lektrogirl

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Wednesday, 6 February 2008

MAD DECENT NICHE MIX

Remember when they used to be called Faggatronix? I don't any more cause now they roll by their government names, Bok Bok and Manara.



Bok Bok and Manara have done another mix, this time for Mad Decent Worldwide Radio.

01 . intro
02 . DJ MURKZ - datz me
03 . TRC - toybox
04 . CHEEKSTA - baby (T2 remix)
05 . EJ - u.f.o
06 . JTJ - love
07 . DA MIGHTY BLAZE - trojan warrior
08 . TS7 - smile ft TONIA
09 . PALEFACE & FLUKES - salt slugs
10 . DEXPLICIT - lifey
11 . TRC - best things ft SCREAMA
12 . DJ MURKZ - dark and grey
13 . DJ Q - fear
14 . NITRO - its you
15 . DEXPLICIT - might be ft GEMMA FOX
16 . IRONSOUL - you liar
17 . MERKURY - my all
18 . ZOMBY - spliff dub (MR FIGZ remix)


As you all know I think that shit music - I can't remember what it is even called now - the music at that crap rave in the squat I went to that stunk of onion bhajis and wet toilets - is shit. But as I have discussed previously, I like "niche". What a stupid effing name. I mean - IDM too. LOL. Niche is like a non-name name where some dude at the record store didn't know what to call a few records so he put them in the corner and called them niche. I should ask Prancehall if he wasn't hating on me so much. Surely he knows everything about everything.

Anyway so I listened to the new Bok Bok and Manara mix today while I painted the living room. It certainly made the task a lot more bearable. The mix is great - even if I wasn't into all the tracks individually. Bok Bok and Manara are my favourite UK DJ's. DJ Goon and DJ Koyote are my favourite French DJ's [see BOYZ II MEN video a coupla posts down HA.]

Oh shit - I'm listening to DJ Guy while I type. He is pretty incredible too...

xx Lektrogirl

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Sunday, 16 December 2007

POSITIVE SIDE TO H.M.L.


My plane to Australia got cancelled! H.M.L. !!! But we all have to stay in a Premier Inn til tomorrow for the next flight. Roxy said I can try and lengthen my trip if need be. So ace. Then I was at the buffet trying to gag down some food. It was really fucking bad. Manara already challenged me to take great pics for my flickr but ones of my minge don't count.

So I took one of hers instead. In the middle of me seafood rice was a screwed up tight little furry mussel I pulled out and started snapping with my camera. These two Asian dudes in plastic gloves and messy aprons came over asking me if everything was okay and if there was a problem with my food. I looked at them like they were retards and said "Have you guys heard of flickr? I'm on holiday" They apologised and left me but kept staring. I couldn't eat any more. The food was revolting. So i went up to them and showed them the picture and said "don't worry guys, this is for my friend Sara. I'm sending it to her cause it looks like her minge." The Chinese Asian knew what I meant. The Indian one didn't. LOL.

xx Lektrogirl

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